Temptation by Design by Andrea Dalling.

© 2016 Andrea Dalling.

Amazon Kindle Edition.

Edited by Dj Hendrickson Editing.

Cover design by Artesian Well Publishing.

All rights reserved. No part of this story may be used, reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means without written permission of the copyright holder, except in the case of brief quotations embodied within critical reviews and articles.

This book is a work of fiction. The names, characters, places, and incidents are products of the writer’s imagination or have been used fictitiously and are not to be construed as real. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, actual events, locale or organizations is entirely coincidental.

The author has asserted her rights under the Copyright Designs and Patents Acts 1988 (as amended) to be identified as the author of this book.

This book contains sexually explicit content which is suitable only for mature readers.

First electronic publication: December 2016.

http://lovelightpress.com

Temptation by Design is set in North Carolina, and as such uses American English throughout.

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

Chapter 5

Chapter 6

Epilogue

Chapter 1                      

Professor Ben Silver strolled into the auditorium through the backstage door. With the production of Macbeth premiering in two months, set design was underway. His pulse sped up as he approached the stage, lights bright. Chase Coltrane came into view. The framing for the backdrops was complete, and Chase was attaching the canvas with a strong, steady hand.

The guy was gorgeous with his thick, dark hair and golden skin, sharp cheekbones and coal-black eyes. Ben shouldn’t notice a student that way, but it was difficult not to. Besides, it wasn’t like Ben would be tempted to do anything with the man. Chase was clearly straight, flirting with all the female students after class. His charisma kept them swarming.

Chase was an architecture student taking Ben’s Shakespeare in Performance class as an elective. Older than most students, he was at North Carolina Coastal College on the G.I. Bill. Now in his junior year, after two tours of duty in the Navy, Chase had to be in his late twenties. It was nice having a more mature student in charge of this aspect of the play.

Ben approached. “You’re making good progress.”

“Thanks.” Chase set down the staple gun. “It’ll be a challenge, designing it to look right from the audience’s perspective rather than close up. But I appreciate the opportunity. I’m learning a lot.”

“We appreciate your hard work.” Ben gave him a smile. By “we,” he meant himself and Professor Fiona Leonard, a drama specialist who was co-teaching the Shakespeare in Performance class. She was also serving as a drama coach for the Coastal College Players, the college’s all-male Shakespeare troupe. Chase had expressed an interest in set design the previous semester and helped out with their production of The Tempest. He’d done such a great job that Ben had put him in charge this time around.

“You hungry?” Chase asked. “I was just about to take a break. You’re welcome to half my sandwich. I’ve got a twelve-inch salami.”

A tingle skittered up Ben’s spine. He was tempted to ask, Yes, but what kind of sub do you have? but didn’t dare. Flirting with students was out of the question, and with straight ones was just foolish.

This wasn’t the first time Chase had offered to split a sandwich with him while they were working on-set. To be honest, Ben had been kind of hoping it would happen tonight. He had no plans for the evening, so a meal with the handsome former petty officer held plenty of appeal.

Ben got himself a water from the vending machine, and they took two seats in the front of the auditorium. “Have you made plans for spring break?” he asked Chase.

“I think I’m going to hang around here mostly. Get ahead on my architecture project. Go to the beach. It’s different for me than for the younger students—they’re away from home for the first time. I spent eight years in the service traveling to places I never thought I’d go.”

“That must have been rough.”

Chase shrugged. “I was in the construction battalion, so I never saw combat. It came close a few times, and we had to pull out in a hurry.” His lips pressed into a thin line. “My mom was a girl in Vietnam during the war, so I grew up hearing stories about what that was like. It gave me some empathy for the civilians we served.”

“Did your dad fight in Vietnam?”

“Yeah, career Army. He retired about the time I graduated high school. I’ve got three older brothers, so…I was a surprise baby.”

Ben chuckled. “A good surprise, I would say.”

“I hope so.” Chase wagged his eyebrows.

Damn, on a gay man, that would have looked like flirting. Ben suppressed the little thrill that rose in his chest. He’d spent too much of his teens and twenties crushing on straight guys. He was thirty-three now, and it was time to grow up.

Ben liked people, was fascinated by them, and most of the time, that was an asset. Unfortunately, it often meant he fell for a guy before he even realized it was happening. And most of the time, they couldn’t reciprocate. It led to a lot of heartache.

Ben was ready to settle down. His last long-term relationship had ended in disaster about six months earlier. Bars weren’t his scene, and Internet dating seemed like a horror to him. He didn’t do hookups, and that’s mostly what guys on the Internet were looking for.

In a small college town in coastal North Carolina, there weren’t that many out gay men to choose from. Ben had gotten tenure a year earlier, so he was committed to the place. Really, he loved the location and the lifestyle. The liberal campus had an unusually large LGBT population. But most of them were students, and off-limits.

Like Chase.

Ben had to keep reminding himself of that. Because even if Chase weren’t a hundred percent straight, Ben could lose his job if he fraternized with a student—tenure or not.

But Chase was what—maybe four years younger than him? Not like Ben would be taking advantage of the guy. And Chase already had an A average, so he had no incentive to swap a blow job for a better grade.

Dumb. Ben shouldn’t have let himself have that thought. Because now he was focusing on Chase’s kissable mouth. Plush lips, neither too full or too narrow.

He tore his eyes away. He didn’t want things to get weird between him and Chase. He liked the easy friendship they had. Well, maybe that was too strong a word. It was companionship.

There weren’t many people Chase’s age on campus. Ben and Chase were more like peers in that respect. It was no wonder they enjoyed hanging out. Was Ben enjoying it too much?

He didn’t think so. He had plenty of self-control, and experience hiding his feelings from straight guys. But something about Chase was different. Things between them were comfortable in a way Ben hadn’t felt before, and that was just…dangerous.

He couldn’t let himself get complacent. Maybe casually sharing a sandwich with the guy on a semi-regular basis wasn’t the best idea in the world. He couldn’t let his heart get involved.

But damn, it felt nice being close to the guy.

***

Chase sat in the amphitheater-style classroom watching Professor Silver and Professor Leonard perform a scene from As You Like It. He repeated that name in his head: Professor Silver. Chase didn’t dare think of the man as Ben. He was already considering him a friend, which of course he wasn’t. Couldn’t be, as long as Chase was a student.

Chase was in a five-year architecture program that would allow him to graduate with a master’s degree. So even though he was a junior, he still had two full years to go. Once he finished his education, though, he hoped he and Silver could become friends for real.

It was weird. He’d never felt drawn to a man like this before. The friendships he’d developed overseas had run deep, but this was different. Like, whenever he saw the guy, a strange sense of lightness came over him. He’d puzzled about it at first, but now he just accepted it. Hanging out with Ben made him happy.

Not Ben. Professor Silver.

Chase smiled as he watched the man perform. His movements were as graceful as a panther’s, his voice smooth and resonant. As good-looking as he was, he could have pursued a career as an actor.

The professors ended the scene, and the class applauded, a spontaneous reaction. This was a teaching exercise, not a performance, but they were good. The teasing, sensual interaction between them in the roles of Rosalind and Orlando was sexy as hell. Who knew Shakespeare could be like that?

It didn’t hurt that Dr. Leonard was a willowy blonde of about thirty, with pale blue eyes and an alabaster complexion. The flowy dress she wore didn’t accentuate her curves, but she definitely had them. Not that Chase was attracted to her, but she was nice to look at, her fair coloring contrasting with Dr. Silver’s dark hair and beard, and his warm olive skin tone.

The guy exuded so much energy when he was in character—but that settled when he went back into professor mode, as if all that passion were somehow unprofessional. Chase wished he could see more of it. The measured, controlled man on the outside did a good job of containing all that exuberance, but that wasn’t the man Chase wanted to know. And he couldn’t help wondering why Ben kept that part of his personality hidden.

When class ended, Chase gathered up his backpack and turned to find Melissa Grayson approaching. She was the stage manager for Macbeth and they were becoming close. Tall with long, dark hair and a slender build, she was dressed in a white blouse and khakis, looking responsible and efficient, as usual. She made a good study partner because she took notes on everything.

“Chase darlin’, would you like to join me for lunch?” She wore an eager smile, and Chase knew what that meant. He wasn’t interested in her that way, but lunch couldn’t hurt, right? Not like it was a date.

“Sure.” He flashed a smile to hide the awkwardness he felt.

Truth was, he’d never really learned how to date. He joined the Navy straight out of high school. With their fraternization rules, dating wasn’t much of an option until he left the service.

So at twenty-six, when he enrolled at Coastal, he felt every bit as inexperienced as the other freshman despite being eight years older than most of them. In a way, Coastal was like an incubator helping him transition back to civilian life. Sometimes when he thought back to his time working in the Construction Battalion, or Seabees as they were known, it felt like he was a different person then.

Now he was almost thirty and still figuring out how to handle women. Melissa was a friend, and he didn’t want to lose that. But he wasn’t attracted to her at all. She was pretty enough, with a nice figure, but not his type. Why did he always seem to attract the wrong women?

As he stood talking to her, he caught Professor Silver’s eye. The man gave him a crooked smile—wistful almost. The expression tugged at Chase. He’d much rather have lunch with Silver than Melissa, but fraternization rules again, even if these were unwritten. As long as Ben—Dr. Silver—was handing out Chase’s grades, they couldn’t be friends.

Which sucked, because Chase couldn’t remember the last time he’d liked anyone so much.

Chapter 2                    

Saturday morning, Ben corralled the members of the Shakespeare troupe in the parking lot of an office park for the third annual Shirtless for Shakespeare car wash, raising money for the play. It was a bright, sunny day, and warm for early spring. The unseasonable weather allowed them to hold the event earlier in the year than usual.

It was almost embarrassing wearing nothing more than a bathing suit and flip-flops in front of his students. Some of them were barely more than boys, slender and still growing into their adult physiques. But most were in prime condition, their bodies firm and defined. As fit as Ben was from running and weight training, he felt self-conscious next to them.

And then there was Chase, who looked every inch the warrior he was. Powerful biceps, sculpted pecs, rippling abs. Ungh. Ben had to pull his gaze away to keep from staring.

“How do you all want to handle this?” Ben asked the young men. “We could set up an assembly line with two guys washing, one rinsing, and one drying.”

He got mostly shrugs from the cast members, who seemed more interested in squirting each other with water than coming up with a viable plan. He caught Chase’s eye, and the guy gave him a smile. There was no need to say anything—he knew that Chase was thinking the same thing he was, and that he could rely on him to help keep the younger men in line.

By noon, the event was drawing more attention than he had expected. Apparently they’d built up some buzz through social media, and a line had developed. Their customers seemed willing to wait—since apparently the enticement was not, in fact, the car wash but the shirtless men. Still, Ben didn’t want to create a traffic flow problem, or the city might give them trouble.

His usual approach was to let the students work things out for themselves, but it was clear that another strategy was needed now. Before Ben could act, Chase stepped in. With military precision, he organized the guys into teams and gave each member a specific job. They quickly cleared out the backlog and were able to keep up with the new customers as they arrived.

As the day wound down, the guys relaxed a bit and it was harder to keep them on task. Even Chase started horsing around. Which was fine, because the crowd had thinned.

At three o’clock, with no more customers in sight, Ben said, “Okay, looks like we’re done here. Gather up the supplies—”

A cold spray of water silenced him as he jumped from its path. He turned toward Chase’s melodious laugh.

“I’ve been wanting to do that all day,” Chase said.

“You’ll be sorry when I dock your grade,” Ben replied with a smile.

“You wouldn’t do that.”

“No, but I might require an extra credit assignment.”

“Designing the set for the play doesn’t count?” Chase gave him a cocky grin.

“Good point. Maybe you should drop and give me twenty instead.”

Without a word, Chase did just that, clapping between each push-up. Then he rose and stared at Ben hard, eyes dancing.

Ben swallowed, a ripple of desire running through his body. “Show-off.”

Chase shrugged. “What’s the point of having it if you don’t flaunt it?”

Ben chuckled. “Flaunting it around this crowd might get you a different kind of attention than you’re looking for.” Probably half the members of the Shakespeare troupe were gay, and a good number of them were checking Chase out at that moment.

Chase raised his brows. “I don’t mind if they look.”

Ben shook his head. “That’s good, because you seem to have made quite an impression. Let’s just collect our things and get out of here. Then we can head to Romeo’s for pizza, my treat.”

That got the group moving. Ben watched with pleasure as Chase barked out orders to the rest of the students, fascinated by how everyone fell in line. Chase exuded confidence and authority, and the other guys responded to it.

Their eyes met across the parking lot. Longing washed over him, more than he had felt for the man before, and it wasn’t just physical.

He had to get a grip on these feelings. He couldn’t fall for a student.

Come Monday, he’d have to talk to Fiona, ask if she could be responsible for Chase’s grades. No way Ben could be objective. Not anymore.

***

Chase took the last slice of the Greek pizza: feta cheese, black olives, artichoke hearts, and bacon. The flavor of garlic, oregano, and sweet tomato sauce burst on his tongue. Romeo’s was a national chain with a family-friendly atmosphere and a 1950s vibe: clean stainless steel, black and white enamel, red and white checked tabletops. A jukebox played “Johnny B. Goode.”

Chase leaned back, feeling as close to bliss as he had in a while. Watching Ben that day, with his gentle way of keeping twenty boisterous young men in line, had been fascinating. He created a sense of camaraderie and teamwork that required no policing.

During his time in the Navy, Chase had studied different leadership styles. Ben’s was pretty rare, but it was among the most effective. Chase wasn’t a natural leader, but he had learned because he wanted the promotions and the responsibility that came with them.

He had joined the Seabees because he liked working with his hands and building things. But the Navy had taught him other skills, too. He learned that he liked envisioning projects from the ground up and watching them come to fruition. His sense of humor and laid-back style made him approachable. He led by example, and his strong work ethic encouraged others to follow.

Ben’s charisma, on the other hand, was the kind you had to be born with. He showed a warmth and appreciation that made those around him feel special. Chase had encountered enough manipulators to recognize bullshit when he saw it. Ben was the real deal.

Chase looked over to the next table, where Ben spoke intently to the group, all eyes on him. He talked about the mythology surrounding “the Scottish play,” as actors called it, since it was considered bad luck to call Macbeth by its name. That man was a natural performer—the intensity of his eyes, the timbre of his voice, the open gestures of his hands all drawing the audience in.

Oddly, Ben didn’t seem to recognize the effect he had on others. Or maybe it was because he was a professor and couldn’t really have a personal relationship with his students. The women in his classes swooned over him—not that he would have been interested in that—and more than one of the cast members had said he wouldn’t mind hitting that.

Chase understood. Not that he was into men that way, but there was no denying Ben was hot. He wasn’t as big as Chase, but what he lacked in bulk he made up for in definition. His easy smile and intelligent dark eyes added to the package. If Chase were gay, he would definitely want some of that.

But Chase wasn’t gay. He’d been with enough women to know. Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell had forced a lot of guys into the closet, but Chase wasn’t one of them. He’d noticed men, of course, but when you lived surrounded by fit guys, it was impossible not to. Noticing a good-looking guy was different from wanting to get with one.

Besides, he couldn’t have gotten with one if he’d wanted to—not without risking his career. So it was a moot point.

Ben came over and pulled up a chair, apparently checking up on the rest of the group.

“How much money did we pull in today?” Chase asked him.

“Enough. With the college matching it, it’ll cover the additional expenses.”

“Cool. Maybe we should do this more often.”

Ben shook his head. “Once a year is enough for me.”

“Or maybe once a semester? We could add a dance number to it, really draw in a crowd.”

“A car wash and cabaret show,” Ben said. “That makes sense.”

“It doesn’t have to make sense. It just has to make money.”

Ben chuckled. “Good point.”

Chase loved the man’s laugh, low and throaty, and how his eyes crinkled up in the corners. He wanted to see him relax and laugh more often, lose that teacher persona and just be a regular guy. He didn’t laugh nearly enough. He was too guarded. Chase wanted to break down those barriers and see the real man.

After dinner, Chase rode with Ben back to campus and helped him put away the supplies. Then, as Ben drove Chase to his off-campus apartment, Chase invited him up for a beer.

“I shouldn’t,” Ben said.

“But you want to,” Chase urged, hearing the hesitation in his voice.

“I do. But as long as I’m your professor—”

“There’s no rule against it, is there?”

“No, but—”

“Then there’s no reason not to.”

Ben looked at him with uncertainty in his expression, a combination of fear and desire, like he was at war with himself. Chase leaned closer. “It’s just a beer.”

“Yeah, okay,” Ben said, unbuckling his seatbelt. “What the hell?”

***

This was a mistake.

Ben looked around Chase’s apartment. It was neat and simply furnished—dove-gray walls, charcoal couch with scarlet pillows, dark hardwoods, and an open kitchen with soapstone countertops and white-painted cabinets. Ben loved everything about it, and wouldn’t have minded spending a considerable amount of time there.

But of course, he couldn’t do that.

Being alone with Chase had his skin tingling and his heart racing. They were sitting close together on the couch, and Ben had to keep pulling his fingers back to stop himself from touching him. He was all the way in the corner, and Chase, right next to him, seemed oblivious to the effect he was having.

“I think two backdrops should be sufficient,” Chase said. “One indoor, one outdoor. We can use props and lighting to differentiate the settings.”

Ben nodded. “Makes sense.”

“I’ve done a lot of reading on the minimalistic way they handled set design in Shakespeare’s day…well, I’m sure you know all about it, so I won’t bore you with the details.”

“You could never bore me.” Shit, did I just say that out loud? Way to go, creepy gay professor.

“It’s fascinating,” Chase continued without missing a beat. “I can see how you’d want to devote your career to this stuff. “

“Shakespeare’s canon is so rich, it’s impossible not to notice something new every time you revisit a play. For me, it’s about delving into human nature. Shakespeare’s intuitive understanding of psychology transcends science. Every character study is a revelation.”

“Who’s your favorite character?”

Ben nodded thoughtfully. “Probably Iago. He’s easily the most intelligent of Shakespeare’s characters. Shrewd, incisive, able to manipulate everyone around him by looking into their hearts and detecting their weaknesses. Yet he’s blind to his own heart, to his own weaknesses. He gives a litany of reasons for why he hates Othello, but he never names the one he shows the audience in the very first scene. He never says, ‘I hate him because he’s black.’ Because that’s illogical, and he’s nothing if not logical. He can’t accept his own human frailty.”

Chase tilted his head to one side. “If he’d recognized his own racism, he’d have had to confront it. And then there wouldn’t have been a play.”

Ben smiled. “Good point.”

“I could never do what you do. I’m not book smart like that.”

Ben’s jaw fell open. “What are you talking about? Architecture is one of the most challenging disciplines. It’s the intersection of engineering and art.”

Chase shrugged. “There was a lot of stuff I never learned because I changed schools so much as a kid. Things that are common knowledge. I mean, I studied the Civil War three times, but in other areas there are big holes. And I don’t find out until it comes up in conversation. I mean, you don’t know what you don’t know, right? So I end up smiling and nodding and feeling stupid.”

“You're anything but stupid, Chase. The paper you wrote last semester on The Taming of the Shrew was one of the best I’ve read. I learned some things from it.”

Chase gaped, but his look of astonishment was quickly replaced by a wide grin. “No, really?”

“Don’t sell yourself short. Your education was spotty because you were an Army brat. That’s not a reflection of your intelligence.”

“That means a lot, coming from you.”

Ben chuckled. “College professors are big fish in a small pond. You volunteered to serve your country during wartime. Nothing I ever do will compare to that.”

Chase’s Adam’s apple bobbed. “You really believe that?”

Ben blinked. Chase couldn’t really doubt the value of his service, could he? Or maybe he just had an over-inflated sense of Ben’s importance. “I hate to burst your bubble, but I’m not some genius. I’m a word nerd who likes the insulated world of academia. You probably saw more of the world by the age of twenty than I’ll see in a lifetime.”

Chase rolled his beer bottle between his palms. “In the Navy, there’s a divide between the non-coms and the commissioned officers. I was hyperaware of my lack of education, and it bugged me. My dad had encouraged me to go to Annapolis after high school, but I wasn’t sure I had what it took. My grades were okay, but every time I started a new school, I struggled to catch up. I didn’t have the confidence for college. Even though the Navy helped me get over that, I guess that teenager who felt dumb all the time is still lurking inside somewhere.”

Ben laid his hand on Chase’s shoulder. “Despite what you seem to think, you excel at academics. Plus, you were amazing with those kids today, the way you took charge and they followed your lead.” He squeezed Chase’s shoulder, then reluctantly pulled his hand away. “You’re an impressive guy, Chase. I wish you could see in yourself what I see in you.”

Chase nodded thoughtfully. “I’m sure you say that to all your students.”

“The hell I do. I’ve never admired a student the way I do you.” Shit. I can’t keep saying unguarded things like that. Shit, shit, shit.

Chase pursed his lips. “I admire you, too. You manage to keep this veneer of authority, while making yourself approachable, almost like a friend. You’re a genuinely good guy, and it comes out in everything you do. You set a high bar and use encouragement to help people reach it. I don’t think I’ve ever seen you angry or in a bad mood. You’re easy to be around. I wish we could hang out more, outside of class and the play.”

Ben fell speechless. He was breathless with desire.

Chase loosened the label of his beer bottle with his thumbnail. “I guess that’s dumb.”

Ben laid his hand on Chase’s knee. “You’re not dumb.” Then, his face heated as he realized what he was doing, and he pulled his hand away. “Sorry.”

“It’s okay.” Chase’s voice was soft and raspy. “Do you think we could be friends? Is that allowed?”

“I can talk to Fiona about taking over your grading. I was going to do that anyway. We’re already friends, Chase, whether we meant for that to happen or not.”

“It’s weird how much I like you. I’ve never felt this way about anyone before, especially not another man. I’m drawn to you, and I can’t explain it.”

Ben’s breath stopped. Hope swelled his chest. This couldn’t be happening—Chase couldn’t be developing feelings for him, could he?

The look in Chase’s eyes said something different. The pupils were blown wide, and his gaze was fixed on Ben. Specifically, on his mouth. “Chase—”

Ben’s voice died as Chase leaned toward him and pressed their lips together. A tumult of emotion—half joy, half lust—washed over him. In that moment of bliss, all Ben’s thoughts faded to pure sensation.

***

Chase wasn’t sure what he was doing, but hell if he could stop it. What an idiot he was, that he’d never seen this coming. If he’d felt this way about a woman, he’d have known instantly what it was. He was falling for Ben, and hard.

The guy had the softest lips, but his beard was rough against Chase’s face, and Chase loved the contrast. Pulling Ben close, Chase deepened the kiss, bunching Ben’s hair in his fingers, flicking their tongues together. He loved the scent of him, like wool and cardamom. And suddenly, all he could think about was getting the guy naked.

He couldn’t deny it anymore. He’d been checking out the guy’s ass all day in those swim trunks that had hung low on his hips. Chase’s dick felt heavy in his tightening jeans. Time to move this show to the bedroom.

Ben pulled away and jumped to his feet. “Shit. I can’t believe I let that happen.”

Chase’s stomach tightened. He stood and threaded his thumbs through his belt loops. “Sorry. If you’re not interested—”

“Chase, for—” He broke off and paced. “I could not be more interested. But I’m your teacher. I could be fired.”

Chase sucked in his lips. “Oh. I kind of forget about that.”

Ben let out a breathy laugh. “Yeah. Me too. Look, there’s two months left in the semester. Then, I can talk to the dean and see what we can do about this. If you still want to, I mean.”

“I’ll want to.” Chase couldn’t help the stupid grin on his face. “I mean, my dick really wants to do something about it—”

“Chase, you cannot talk to me like that. For one thing, your dick is the last thing I should be thinking about right now. And for another, it puts us on even shakier ground. We have to put that kiss out of our minds, like it never happened.”

“Uh, sure. I can do that.” Not.

Ben folded his arms and nodded. “I had no idea you were bi.”

“Me neither.”

“Really?”

“With Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell, it wasn’t really an option. So if I ever had any feelings like that, maybe I just dismissed them. Unconsciously, I mean.”

Ben nodded. “I can see that.”

Chase paced, running his fingers through his hair. He should be losing his shit about this—about the fact that he’d just kissed a man, and was totally into it—but he wasn’t. He was much more concerned about the school keeping him and Ben apart. “Two months, right? Then we can date?”

“I didn’t say that. I said I’ll talk to the dean. We might have to wait until you graduate.”

An icy chill washed over him. “That’s two years.”

“Hopefully, they’ll be understanding. You’re ten years older than most students, and there’s no reason you have to take another class from me. But we have to be careful. Keep our distance until the semester ends. Otherwise, it could be bad for both of us.”

“I get that.” He slid his hands into his pockets. “Sorry. About the kiss, I mean. I shouldn’t have been so careless.”

Ben grinned. “Don’t be sorry about the kiss. I’m not. Unfortunately, I really need to leave now.”

Disappointment hung heavy in Chase’s chest. “Yeah. That sucks, though. I guess I’ll see you in class on Monday?”

Ben nodded. “Don’t get concerned if I treat you like every other student. That’s how things need to be for a while, okay? I can’t single you out. But believe me, Chase, you’re special to me. I want this. In two months, hopefully, I can show you how much.”

“I’m looking forward to it.” Warmth rushed over him, the desire to know Ben, to know what it would be like to be with another man. Not acting on that impulse for two months would be torment.

They stood gazing at each other, tension thick between them, but all Ben could do was head slowly for the door. No gentle touches, no kiss good night. Just goodbye.

Chapter 3                    

At noon on Monday, Fiona caught up with Ben in his office. “Can we talk? I could order us some lunch from Giuseppe’s.”

“That sounds good,” he answered. “There’s something I want to discuss with you as well.”

She called the deli, then closed the door and sat, crossing her legs and pursing her lips. “I’m a little concerned about you and Chase.”

A chill raced across his skin. Did she know about the kiss? How could she possibly have found out, unless Chase told her? No, he wouldn’t have done that. Just play it cool. “That’s actually what I wanted to discuss with you. Chase and I…well, we’ve become friends. I didn’t mean for it to happen, but it did. I thought it would be best if you graded his work for the Shakespeare in Performance class.”

She nodded, her gaze hard. “I think that’s a good idea. Ben, you need to be more careful. I overheard some students talking about Saturday…they were joking about you having a crush on him. Which normally I might dismiss, but I’ve seen the same thing myself. The way you look at him is…smoldering. We wouldn’t want these rumors to get out of hand.”

Ben swallowed. That was not good news. Obviously, he wasn’t being as careful as he thought. “I admit, he’s an attractive man. But I’m a professional, Fiona. I’ll keep this under control.”

“I’m sure you will. Still, I think it would be a good idea if you didn’t spend time alone with him. I know the two of you hang out sometimes while he’s working on the set. It might be good if I joined you, if the two of you have anything to discuss.”

Anger built in his chest. “You think I need a chaperone.”

“I don’t mean—”

“No, you’re right. An abundance of caution. We don’t want to take any chances.” Ben couldn’t keep the bitterness out of his voice. It wasn’t Fiona he was upset with—it was the situation. Why shouldn’t he be able to date Chase, if it’s what they both wanted, and Ben arranged for someone else to handle Chase’s grades?

“I’m sorry,” she said. “I’ve obviously upset you.”

“It’s not you. You’re being a good friend, Fiona, and I appreciate that. The fraternization rules at most other colleges aren’t as strict as the ones here. Chase and I are both adults. We don’t need Big Brother monitoring our behavior.”

“The rules are there for a reason. When I was an undergrad, my roommate was propositioned by a married professor with an infant daughter. She didn’t go to the dean about it because she didn’t want to be responsible for breaking up his marriage. When a man is in a position of authority like that, it’s easier for him to pressure an inexperienced young woman into sex. I agree the situation is different for a former naval officer who’s nearing thirty—but they’re good rules, Ben.”

He nodded. She was right, of course. What had happened to her roommate—the very idea of it made him sick. He saw it as his job to protect the students, especially the freshmen, who were away from home for the first time and still learning how to be adults. The fact that any professor would take advantage of the situation that way was infuriating.

People like that had no place in academia.

He would do better. He would obey the rules until the semester ended, and make sure he was never alone with Chase, as Fiona had suggested. It wouldn’t be easy—but then, keeping his hands off Chase if the two were alone together wouldn’t be easy, either. He hated to admit it, but he wasn’t thinking clearly about the situation, and Fiona’s perspective was a blessing.

“You’re completely right,” Ben said. “I appreciate your frankness.”

“Anytime.” She reached out and patted his hand.

That little bit of contact made his throat swell. He’d been lonely since the breakup with Dorian, even if the guy had turned out to be a douche. Ben was finally ready to date again, and the man he wanted was off-limits. Two more months of celibacy held no appeal—but he had to admit, Chase was worth the wait.

***

Wednesday, Chase entered the Shakespeare in Performance class still seething from the night before. After the hot kiss they’d shared, Ben had the nerve to show up on-set Tuesday evening with Professor Leonard at his side, talking about design elements for the interior backdrop, as if he and Chase hadn’t experienced something special. As if they weren’t even friends.

Ben had never been aloof, not even when he and Chase had first met the semester before. He’d been friendly and encouraging, taking an interest in Chase’s history and his service. Made him feel at home in a Shakespeare class that otherwise felt alien to him. Helped him develop a genuine interest in the subject, even a passion for it.

And now he was talking antiseptically about what kind of archways they should have and what color stone they should use for an eleventh century Scottish castle.

Brownstone, not gray field stone like you might assume. Scotland has naturally occurring brownstone, just like New York, because they used to be connected before continental drift—

That’s so interesting, professor who wanted to fuck me three days ago.

What was Chase supposed to make of that? Had the guy lost interest? Maybe he’d decided Chase wasn’t worth waiting two months for.

What an idiot I am. Why would a smart, important man like Ben want to wait for a nobody like Chase? Sure, Chase had a hot body, but what else did he have to offer? Ben had been horny Saturday night. Now, in the cold light of day, he wasn’t interested anymore.

Chase should have seen that coming.

Ben’s words from Saturday ran through Chase’s mind—how Ben would have to treat Chase like any other student. Could that be what was going on? Hope rose in Chase’s chest. But he couldn’t let himself believe that. The situation was complicated, and why would a man like Ben want complications in his life? The dude had everything—a nice body, a prestigious job, a great sense of humor—he could easily find someone else to keep him warm at night.

The thought of Ben with someone else pissed Chase off. Ben was supposed to belong to him now. He’d never wanted a man this way before, but somehow it seemed completely natural. In this situation, how could he fight for the guy? They couldn’t be together, couldn’t even be friends.

Chase should let him go. Let him find someone he could actually have.

Chase sat, shoulders slumped, waiting for the professors to arrive. Melissa sat next to him. The last thing he wanted was to make conversation, but he supposed he should be nice.

“Mornin’, sweetie,” she said. “It’s nice to see you. How are things goin’ with the set design?”

“Good. I should be ready to start painting in a week or two. I’m putting together some sketches for the professors so they can approve the final concept.”

“My goodness, you’re amazingly talented! I didn’t realize you were an artist, too.”

“Artist isn’t quite the right word. I’ll be using a program from my architecture classes and transferring the design to the backdrop. It’s more like a paint-by-numbers than a work of art.”

She shook her head. “You always do that, downplay your skills and all. Humility is nice, but confidence is a very attractive quality in a man.”

He shrugged. “Transferring the design isn’t hard if you know how.”

“Maybe not for you! For most people, it would be.”

“It’s knowledge, not talent.”

“Talent is overrated. What matters is putting that knowledge into practice. You’re a true craftsman, Chase. Don’t underestimate the value of that.”

He nodded thoughtfully, then sat up in his chair as the professors entered. Ben was dressed in a crisp striped Oxford shirt with a navy sport coat and khakis. Something about the look appealed to Chase—the comfort and familiarity of it, but also the way it emphasized Ben’s intelligence. It wasn’t trendy. It was the uniform of Ben’s profession.

And for some reason, that made Chase feel like he would be safe with the man. Ben was a tenured professor. He had a job at Coastal for as long as he wanted it. He could speak his mind, be open and even radical in his ideas, and they couldn’t fire him for it.

Ben could offer him permanence.

Chase had never had that before. Truth was, the three years he’d spent at Coastal were the longest he’d ever lived in one place. And he liked it there. The proximity to the ocean, the mild climate, the friendliness of the people. With Ben, Chase could become part of a community. He could grow roots.

Was that even an option anymore? Could he and Ben make this work? What if two months stretched into two years?

Chase could wait. He’d always been a patient guy, and the Navy had made him more so. But could Ben?

The truth was, Chase didn’t know. He hadn’t had much chance to get to know Ben, really. Most of their interactions had been as professor and student. Yeah, they’d shared some meals together. And Chase knew he really liked the guy. But if they waited two years for each other, how could they know they’d even be compatible at the end of it?

His parents hadn’t known each other all that long when his dad brought his mom over from Vietnam. His mom said it was love at first sight. Chase had never really believed in that, but with Ben, that’s how it felt. Like they were soul mates. Like everything in his life had been leading to this.

Did Ben feel the same way? Or was Chase just a hot body he wanted to hit?

Chase hated this sense that he was drifting and alone. In the course of an evening, everything had changed for him. That kiss had opened up a new world. And he couldn’t even explore what that meant for him. He couldn’t find a solid place to land.

Class started, and Chase turned his attention to the lecture. During Ben’s part, Chase tried to catch his eye, but the guy wouldn’t even look at him. When Chase raised his hand to join the discussion, Ben didn’t call on him once. The guy was actively ignoring him. Chase wasn’t imagining that.

And when Dr. Leonard took over, the couple of times she called on Chase, Ben looked away. Usually he stayed engaged in the discussion, but now he looked uncomfortable. Like he wanted to be somewhere else.

The only time Chase had ever seen a guy act that way was when he was trying to blow off a hookup. So, okay, that’s what was going on here. Ben realized he’d made a mistake, and he was sending Chase a message.

Chase got it, loud and clear.

***

Around nine that night, Ben stood outside the door to Chase’s apartment, hand raised to knock. He dropped it again. This is a bad idea. Being alone with Chase was too much of a temptation. But after four days with so much distance between them, Ben was losing his mind. Chase had been quiet and broody in class, and when he didn’t show up for rehearsal, Ben knew something was wrong.

Maybe talking on the phone would be better. But Chase was the kind of person who could make it seem like everything was fine when it wasn’t. He had that smooth, cool veneer that covered up what was in his heart. The two of them needed to talk face-to-face.

He knocked, and nearly bolted as soon as he did. But he forced himself to stay put and listened as footsteps approached.

The smile that touched Chase’s face when he opened the door quickly fled. “Hey, Professor, what’s up?” he asked in a casual tone, although Ben was sure his feelings were anything but casual.

“You missed rehearsal. Can we talk?”

Chase’s head tilted to one side. “Sure.” He stepped aside to let Ben in, then closed the door behind him.

Ben looked at him intently. “I miss you.”

Chase huffed. “Could’ve fooled me.”

“I’m not trying to fool you. I’m trying to fool everyone around us. Fiona said people have noticed how I look at you, like I want you. So I can’t keep doing that. It’s killing me, Chase, but my job is on the line. Tenure won’t save me if I sleep with a student.”

Chase nodded, and his body lost some of its rigidity. “Oh. That makes sense.”

“I told you I’d have to treat you like any other student, remember?”

“Yeah, but you aren’t treating me like other students. You’re treating me like I don’t exist. I just found out I’m bisexual, Ben. I could use some support here. Instead, you’ve just checked out of this relationship. And I get why you have to do that, but it’s killing me.”

“Babe…” Ben drew him into a tentative hug, and Chase let out a little cry. Ben drew him close, and Chase held on to him.

“I’m sorry,” Ben said. “I don’t know how else to handle this situation. I can’t go to the dean now, not while you’re in a class I’m teaching. That won’t go well. Please just be patient. I love you—”

The words came out of his mouth before Ben realized he was thinking them, but as soon as they did, he knew they were the truest words he’d ever spoken. He’d fallen in love with the guy, and seeing him torn up was like a vise on his heart.

But now that those words were out, how would Chase react? Would he run? Because so far, they’d only shared one kiss, and it was way too soon to be talking about love.

Chase looked at him with teary eyes. “You love me?” His throat worked. “Thank God. I thought it was just me.”

The two of them laughed, and Ben drew him close again, hugging him tightly. He didn’t dare kiss him, because he knew where that would end up. They were both hard—Ben could feel that in the pressure of Chase’s body against his hip. It wouldn’t take much for their reptilian brains to take over and send logic out the window.

“I have to go,” Ben said, “before I lose control here. But I meant what I said, okay? Even if I can’t say it again for a while.”

“Yeah. Okay. I meant it, too.”

“You have to trust me, Chase. Can you do that? I can’t show you how I feel until the semester’s over. But you’re in my heart every moment.”

“Thanks. I needed to hear that.”

“If you’re struggling with your sexuality, you can go to the LGBT center and talk to one of the peer counselors. They’re trained to help. Just don’t mention my name, okay?”

“I wouldn’t do that. I’m not that dumb.”

“You’re not dumb at all. You’re my smart, sexy sailor. One of these days I’m going to have you put on your sailor cap and nothing else, and ride me senseless.”

Chase groaned. “Now. We should do that now.”

“I wish we could, babe. Think about that tonight, and I’ll be thinking about it, too.”

“At least kiss me goodbye.”

Ben looked up into Chase’s eyes, at the need burning there, and a shiver rushed over him. He almost gave in, but knew if he did, he was done for.

“I can’t.” His voice was barely a whisper. He forced himself out of Chase’s grasp, all the while his body screaming for touch, for comfort, for Chase’s large, strong hand to wrap around Ben’s cock. He wanted this like he’d never wanted anything. And he had to go.

He made his way to the door, then looked over at Chase. “We have to be very careful. No phone calls, no texts…nothing that leaves a trail. We can’t have a relationship, Chase. Whatever is in our hearts has to stay there until I get permission from the school to date you. I hate it, but that’s the way it has to be. No doubting me, okay?”

Chase smiled. “Yeah. Got it.”

“See you at rehearsal tomorrow, right?”

“I’ll be there.”

Ben left and closed the door. Then he leaned back against it, longing for Chase’s touch.

He forced his legs to move. If anyone saw him hanging out like this, it was one more piece of evidence that could be used against him if there was ever a hearing. Ben loved this job, and he didn’t dare risk it. Not when he and Chase were so close to being together openly.

***

Friday of the following week, Chase arrived at Ben’s house with a six-pack of beer. About half the guys from the cast were already there. It was just an informal party, but no way Chase was turning that down.

Before he could get his bearings, Melissa came and took his jacket along with a couple of others, and headed upstairs with them. Chase looked around. The house was a craftsman style with cream-painted molding and pale taupe walls. The lights were dim, the furnishings modern but comfortable. An overstuffed couch and matching loveseat upholstered in sturdy fabric were accompanied by a cognac-colored leather easy chair. Chase could imagine Ben sitting in it grading papers. The image pleased him, and a little tickle rose in his stomach.

Professor Leonard came out of the kitchen carrying a plate of fruit and cheese. “Beer can go in the fridge,” she said to Chase, then added for the benefit of the others, “but no underage drinking. I’m completely serious about that.”

Chase went into the kitchen and found Ben there taking the cellophane off a veggie platter. Chase smiled at him. “Since when is Professor Leonard such a stickler for the rules?”

“She’s not,” Ben said, “except where students are concerned. She’s a free spirit if ever I met one.” He took the beer from Chase, and their fingers brushed together. He lifted his eyebrows and gave Chase a smile and a soft look.

Chase smiled back. This felt nice, this little slice of domesticity, even though they couldn’t act on their feelings. Here in his own home, Ben looked comfortable and relaxed. “It’s good to see you like this.”

Ben put the beer in the fridge, then said in low tones, “I can’t socialize with you alone, but I can with other people around.”

Chase raised his brows. “So all this is for me?”

“Basically.” Ben gave him a smile and carried the platter into the dining room.

Chase grabbed a beer and followed. Ben sat in the last seat, so Chase planted himself next to him on the arm of the couch.

“Do you want to sit here?” Ben asked.

“No thanks, I’m good.”

“Are you sure? I wouldn’t be much of a host if—”

“I’m very comfortable.” Truth was, as far as Chase was concerned, he had the best seat in the house. He was as close to Ben as he could be without touching him.

Until Professor Leonard came over and said, “Chase, do you have a minute?”

“Uh, sure.” He followed her into the kitchen.

“Can I get you another beer?” she asked.

“Thanks, that would be good.”

She opened the fridge and handed him a can from the six-pack he had brought, then poured herself a glass of rosé. “You were in the military. You understand the importance of an authority figure avoiding any appearance of impropriety.”

He scowled. “Yeah…”

“Has Ben talked to you about this?”

His cheeks burned. “Oh. That.”

“The appearance of favoritism can be as detrimental to morale as the existence of it. You’re a good student, Chase. All your professors speak highly of you. I wouldn’t want anyone to think your grade in our class was because of a personal relationship.”

Melissa entered and set some wine glasses in the sink. She eyed them a moment and said, “Sorry, am I interruptin’?”

“Not at all,” Dr. Leonard said. “We were just discussing ethics.”

“Oh, that’s such an interestin’ subject. I’m taking Professor Chang’s business ethics class. It’s fascinating, and not always as clear-cut as you might expect.”

“In what way?” Dr. Leonard asked.

“For instance, your intentions aren’t necessarily the most important thing. What matters is how people perceive your actions. Say you visit a country where the custom is to give valuable gifts to clients. Here, well now, that would be bribery. But you have to accept the gift, or it would be insulting. So companies require their workers to donate the gift or a sum of money equal to its value.”

Melissa brushed her hair behind her ears. “Now, you’d think that would be the end of it, right? But there’s more to it. If you keep the gift in your office, someone might get the wrong idea. They wouldn’t know you’ve donated the value to charity. So you’d still have to be careful.”

Professor Leonard nodded vigorously. “That’s an excellent illustration of the point Mr. Coltrane and I were making.”

Chase gritted his teeth. He felt like he was being indoctrinated into some weird cult. Which was strange, because he’d never felt that way in the military. There, he was doing important work protecting his country. Here, it felt like all he was protecting were people’s egos.

“Chase, you’re in kind of a unique situation,” Melissa continued. “You’re about the same age as Professor Leonard and Professor Silver. The line of authority is more blurred. Now I can totally understand that. You’re more experienced than the rest of the students here. Why, you’ve been in a position of authority yourself. Yet, when I came in and y’all stopped talking…well, someone else might have thought y’all were flirting.”

Chase eyed her, stunned by her words. “You don’t really think—”

“Not at all. But a more suspicious person might.” She poured herself a glass of wine and exited the kitchen.

Dr. Leonard stared after her. “Huh.”

Chase let out a little laugh. “I guess I should excuse myself.”

“I guess you should.”

As the evening progressed, Chase watched Ben from a safe distance this time. Everything about him was charming and delightful. His sense of humor, his kindness, his intelligence—the patience and caring he showed toward his students. His eyes shone as he spoke, and his gestures showed off his beautiful hands. Chase had never noticed a man’s hands before, but there was something about them. They weren’t small like a woman’s hands, but the shape was finer than most men’s, as if they were carved from marble.

He never thought the sight of a man’s hands could make him horny, but everything about Ben seemed to have that effect on him.

As the crowd started to thin, Chase helped Ben and Melissa clean up. Dr. Leonard had left earlier for a previous engagement, and only a handful of the guys from the cast remained. Chase wanted to be the last to go, but if that happened, he didn’t know where it might lead. Or rather, he knew exactly where it might lead, and he didn’t want to do anything that could put Ben at risk.

He went to the bedroom to pick up his jacket from the pile. Only a few were left, so it was easy to locate his leather bomber. Though the spring days were warm, the nights were still cool.

Confident footsteps approached, and Ben stopped in the doorway when his eyes met Chase’s. “I thought I’d bring the rest of these jackets downstairs.”

Chase nodded. “Nice big bed you’ve got there.”

“Room for two. Maybe even three.”

“Are you into that?”

Ben chuckled. “No. Just teasing.” His eyes widened. “Are you?”

Chase shook his head. “There’s only one man for me.”

Ben’s intense gaze burned through him.

An ache Chase could barely contain built in his chest, and he pushed the door shut. The thought of leaving filled him with despair. “I can’t keep doing this. Spending time with you makes it worse. When I’m not with you, I want to be with you. When I’m with you, I want everything.”

“I know.”

“It would almost be better not seeing you. But I couldn’t stand that.”

“Six more weeks, babe.”

“If they let us date. If they don’t…” Chase combed his fingers through his hair. “I can’t do this for two years, Ben. I can’t.”

“Let’s not think about that now. If that happens, we’ll figure it out.”

“Figure it out, how?”

“We’ve got options. But let’s try to stay positive, okay? Hopefully, it won’t come to that.” Ben opened the door. “Come on. Let’s grab these coats and go downstairs.”

Chase nodded, feeling helpless. He was accustomed to following orders, to making sacrifices for the sake of the unit, but this wasn’t some battle plan. This was his life. He ought to have some say.

He and Ben dropped the jackets onto the couch. Chase looked around and picked up the empty cups and soda cans scattered around the room, then went into the kitchen to throw them out. Melissa was there washing the empty platters.

“You don’t have to do that,” Ben said to her as he entered carrying two mostly empty bowls of chips and pretzels.

“I don’t mind,” she answered.

“She’s just gunning for an A,” Chase said.

“Cynical,” she replied.

The last of the guys came in and said their thanks and goodbyes to their host. Ben accompanied them to the door.

Melissa set the platter she was washing in the dish drainer and dried her hands. “This was nice,” she said to Chase. “We see each other all the time, but we don’t get to socialize much.”

“Yeah, the cast party was a good idea.”

She rolled her eyes. “I don’t mean the cast, darlin’, I mean you and me. We should get together more often. You’re still single, aren’t you?”

He bit his lip, unsure how to answer that question. “I don’t have a girlfriend, if that’s what you’re asking.”

“Then maybe sometime we could—”

“Sorry, I don’t mean to cut you off, but I need to find a restroom.”

He took three long strides and exited the kitchen, then locked himself in the powder room. Damn it, he had to stop running from her. He should just be honest. As a friend, she deserved that. But seriously, why the hell couldn’t she take a hint?

Chase did his business, then washed up and headed back to the living room. It was empty. Ben entered from the kitchen.

“Where’s Melissa?”

“She, uh, she left.”

“Oh. We were just talking, and I thought…” He shook his head. “Did she seem pissed at me?”

“A little annoyed, yeah.”

Chase shrugged. “Just as well, I guess.” He looked around. “So we’re here all alone.” Meeting Ben’s eyes, he couldn’t stop a grin from splitting his face.

“Don’t look at me like that,” Ben said with a smile. “You can’t stay.”

He looped his thumbs through his belt loops. “I’d like to see you try to make me leave.”

“Chase…”

“Face it, I’m bigger and stronger than you,” he teased. “Which is just how I like it.” He stalked toward him.

Ben took a step back, but lust burned in his eyes. “You can’t do this.”

“Can’t I?” They were close enough that Chase could hear Ben’s breathing. He swallowed, but the desire welling in his throat wouldn’t subside.

Ben was so close, his body trembling. That vulnerability undid Chase. Reason fled, and he acted on instinct, pulling Ben into a kiss.

Ben groaned and went lax in his arms, parting his lips to let Chase in. The warmth of Ben’s body, the touch of his hands felt right. Like it was written in the stars.

Before long, Ben was rutting against him, the friction of their two cocks sending heavy pulsing through Chase’s veins. The pleasure was like nothing he’d experienced. So different than being with a woman.

Chase couldn’t remember ever being this hard, but just kissing Ben was amazing. The guy was hungry for it, devouring Chase with lips and tongue. Chase backed him against the wall to get better purchase.

Still spearing Ben’s mouth with his tongue, Chase reached around and grabbed Ben’s ass. It was firm and round and perfect. Chase remembered what Ben had said about Chase pounding him wearing nothing more than a sailor’s cap, and the thought of it nearly made Chase come in his pants.

He wanted to be inside Ben right fucking now, but he didn’t dare leave this spot and give Ben time to change his mind. Instead, he unbuckled Ben’s belt and opened his fly. Ben whimpered, the sound so full of desire it sent shivers skimming across Chase’s skin.

His hand found Ben’s cock, and the man keened. It was larger than Chase expected, of average length but nice and thick. Circumcised, of course, and a plump reddish-pink. He ran his palm down the shaft while his thumb circled the satin tip. Ben’s soft pleas encouraged him.

He suckled the man’s neck while reaching under his shirt with his free hand to find the soft nub of a nipple. Flicking it gently, he soon had Ben begging. He pressed his pelvis against Ben’s hipbone, aching for relief.

Ben unzipped Chase’s jeans and found his throbbing cock. “Hell yes,” Chase said in his ear. “Need you.”

Ben rubbed their bare cocks together, and Chase’s mind blanked. There was nothing in the world for him but the pleasure of Ben’s body and his touch. Chase lost all sense of time, but at some point he fisted them together, and he could not stop. The only lubrication was their precum, and it was enough.

He thrust against Ben over and over, like a man devoid of his senses, like a raving, wild beast. He nibbled at Ben’s lips and tugged at his earlobe with his teeth. Ben writhed and moaned and shuddered with each touch.

The dam broke, and Chase spilled over his hand and their two cocks, unable to contain his cries of pleasure. Ben soon followed. “Yes, babe,” Chase murmured in his ear. “Come for me.”

Chase held him through his convulsions, until he stilled and snuggled his head against Chase’s neck. Between little pecks on the tender flesh, Ben said, “So perfect, babe.”

Chase kissed him, softer this time, less needy, more contented. “I could never get enough of you.”

“Spend the night.”

Chase chuckled. “You know I can’t do that. What if someone sees me here in the morning? You could lose your job.”

“I don’t need my job. I need you.”

“That’s the afterglow talking. Tomorrow morning, things will look different.”

“I suppose.” Ben pressed his cheek to Chase’s. “I hate that we can’t be together.”

“Me too.”

Ben caressed Chase’s chest. “Is my beard too rough on you?”

“Your beard feels fantastic.”

“Good. I grew it when I first started teaching, to make me look older. I had kind of a baby face, and looked the same age as my students. I was afraid they wouldn’t take me seriously.”

“You’re great with students. You don’t need a beard for that. Not that I want you to shave it.” Chase kissed him.

Ben looked down. “We should really clean up. As much as I love having your cum on me, we’re kind of a mess.”

Chase grabbed some napkins from a nearby table, and they made do. As they zipped up their pants, Ben looked at him sadly. “We can’t let this happen again. You know that, right?”

Chase’s heart grew heavy. “I know. But I’m not sorry we did it. Now that I know how great we are together…it makes me less anxious. Like, I know that this is worth waiting for. Worth fighting for. And I will fight for it, Ben. Talk to the dean, do whatever I need to do. We belong together.”

Ben skated his hands along Chase’s torso. “What did I do to deserve you?”

Chase smiled. “I’m the lucky one.”

“Not even a little.” Ben chuckled. “One of these days, you’ll realize how amazing you are, and I’ll have to step up my game.”

Chase kissed him. “I feel like we should…make this official somehow. As official as we can, at least. I want to be your boyfriend. I want us to be exclusive.”

“You’ve got it. Although I feel kind of guilty, taking you off the market when I can’t offer you anything.”

“I know you’re mine. That’s enough.”

“Yours forever, my sexy sailor.”

Chase pressed his forehead to Ben’s. “It makes me so hot when you say that.”

“I’ll keep that in mind.”

Chase nodded. “I need to go, don’t I.”

“You really do.”

“I’ll be counting the weeks.”

“Me, too.” Ben’s voice was despondent.

“I could go to Dean Krychek and tell her we’re in love—”

“That would be bad.”

Chase shuffled his feet. “I guess.”

“Trust me on this.” Ben laid his hands on Chase’s shoulders. “June isn’t that far away.”

Ben took his hands and walked him to the door. Chase picked up his jacket and stepped out into the cool night. Looking up at the stars, he made a wish, like he used to do when he was boy. And he prayed the wish would come true.

Chapter 4                    

Ben stood in his office Monday afternoon looking at the stack of bluebooks he had to grade. But his concentration was shot, so there was no point.

Saturday night was bad. It was possibly the best night of his life, but he and Chase had crossed a line. If the truth came out…Ben wasn’t going to lie about it. A student had initiated sexual contact, and he hadn’t stopped it.

He never imagined he would be that guy.

The fact they were in love was no excuse, and it wouldn’t hold sway at any hearing. He wasn’t supposed to fall in love with a student.

A student in his class. Holy hell.

This was the kind of thing that could follow him for the rest of his career. Even if he somehow managed to keep his job, he’d lose the respect of the faculty and administration. Everyone would think he’d taken advantage of his position.

And in a way, hadn’t he? Chase had an overinflated sense of Ben’s importance in the world, and an underinflated sense of his own. Ben should have fought the attraction. Should have told Chase a relationship was out of the question.

As if Ben could have done that, when he was in love with the guy.

He ran his fingers through his hair. These recriminations would have to wait, because he had an appointment to get to.

Melissa knocked on his open office door. “Do you have a minute?”

“I’m on my way to meet with Chase and Fiona about his sketches for the backdrop design. Walk with me?”

“I’d be happy to.”

He stepped into the hallway, then closed and locked the door. “You’re welcome to join us if you like. I’d appreciate your opinion. You have time?”

“Why yes, I’d love to help any way I can.”

They headed down the stairs, their steps echoing. “What did you want to discuss?” he asked.

“Well, it seems like such a small thing. I was sorting through our collection of props for candles, you know, for the Lady Macbeth sleepwalking scene? And the ones we have, well, they just don’t seem sufficient. They look fake even from a distance. So I took a little trip to the mall and found some that would work—but I’m worried about the price. The cost would be about fifty dollars for three of them. I know that seems like a terrible amount of money. But it’s such an important scene, one of the most famous in all of drama! I’d hate for the audience to be distracted thinking about the candles looking fake.”

He chuckled. “I see your point. I’ll check the budget and see if we can swing it.”

“Thanks, Professor, I appreciate it.” They stepped out into the sunlight. “So I noticed at the party the other night—you and Chase, it seems like you’ve become…good friends.”

A chill trickled down his back. Did she suspect something? He didn’t want to lie to her, so he paused a moment to formulate a neutral answer. “It’s difficult to define where the line is between being friendly and being friends. I’m afraid Chase and I may have crossed that line and realized it only after the fact. I’ve asked Professor Leonard to be responsible for grading him to avoid any possibility of favoritism.”

Melissa nodded. “I’m glad to hear that. You know I’m taking Professor Chang’s business ethics class? Well, we’ve discussed this sort of thing. It may seem like it only affects the two of you, but the fact is, it can also touch the people around you. Like Dr. Leonard. She knows you two are friendly. How will she feel if she has to give Chase a lower grade than he expects? Will she worry that it will impact her relationship with you? And what if Chase has friends in your classes—will you feel the grades you give them could affect your relationship with him?”

“You’re right—and I’m aware of the ethical issues. Chase and I agree that our relationship needs to be strictly professional as long as he’s a student of mine.”

“You mean as long as he’s a student at all, right?” Melissa shook her head. “Dr. Silver, may I be frank with you?”

“Of course.”

“I don’t talk about this much, because I keep my business to myself—but my brother is gay. Seeing you and Chase together, it almost looks to me like maybe you’re interested in him. Now I know you’re aware of the stereotype that gay men are predators lookin’ for straight men to corrupt. Of course that’s not what you’re doin’, but the appearance of it could be dangerous. This is a gay friendly school—the conservative media would love to paint us as a hotbed of immorality.”

Ben seethed at her words, but she was right. The fact that he was gay made the situation potentially even more unseemly to an outsider. It wasn’t fair, but it was a fact, and one he couldn’t ignore.

“I appreciate your candor,” he said. “I’m sorry if I’ve been indiscreet. Obviously, you’re concerned, and I shouldn’t have put you in that position.”

“You’re a good teacher, Professor Silver. I have a tremendous respect for you. I wouldn’t want this to hurt you—or Chase.”

“Thank you.”

They entered the Arts Center and headed to the backstage door to the auditorium. Chase was there with Fiona, sketches spread out over a table. The sight of Chase brought Ben’s body to life, but he fought to keep a clear head. He couldn’t take any chances. He had to keep his attraction contained.

“Hey, Melissa,” Chase said, “I didn’t know you were joining us.”

“Dr. Silver just invited me. Wasn’t that sweet of him? Now, show me what you’ve come up with. I’m so excited to see it!”

“Take a look. For the interiors, I’m suggesting Norman arches. Nothing too elaborate, just a square stone molding to create depth. For the exterior, a heather field with craggy rocks and rolling, wooded hills.”

“That sounds nice,” Ben said, “but not particularly ominous.”

Chase grinned. “The flowers will be dried and faded. Desolation and decay.”

“That’s better.”

“Maybe some sheep,” Fiona said.

“I’m not sure we want it too pastoral,” Chase said, “since the opening is a battlefield. Chances are, any sheep hanging around would have ended up as mutton to feed the soldiers.”

“Oh, good point,” Fiona concurred. “You’ve done a nice job,” she added, looking at the images on the computer.

Ben, meanwhile, scanned the printouts. Chase’s drafts were brilliant. He understood the importance of eye-catching imagery rather than small details in designing a set. Ben was proud of him and wanted to say so, but didn’t dare.

He settled back and listened as the women discussed the different options with Chase. Being close to the man but not able to touch him was making Ben anxious and edgy. He got up and paced to get rid of the nervous energy, pretending to examine how the sketches would look against the backdrop. Truth was, he was too preoccupied to focus on much of anything but how much he wanted Chase.

“Ben, you’re making me nervous,” Fiona said at last.

“Sorry.” He took his seat and sprawled away from the table.

Fiona eyed him cautiously. “Do we need to talk about the tension in here?”

“There’s nothing to talk about.”

“It seems silly to ignore it. We’re all adults.”

“Professor Leonard,” Chase said, “I’m sure you mean well. If there’s any tension, it’s because Ben’s being treated as if he’s some kind of predator, and he’s not.”

“The fact that you call him Ben is a problem.”

“Like you said, we’re all adults, and we should be frank with each other. Ben is a nice guy. He’s genuinely concerned about the well-being of other people. And now he’s worried he’s done something terrible by liking me too much. That’s an unfair burden for him to carry.”

“Chase, I appreciate your saying that,” Ben said. “I’m sorry this came up in front of you and Melissa— it’s between Fiona and me.”

Chase’s expression clouded and he looked away.

Damn it. Now Chase was upset, and all Ben wanted to do was take him in his arms and reassure him. He stood and gathered his things. “I think Fiona’s right. My presence here is disruptive. I really like these four sketches—I’d be happy with any of them. The three of you can make the decision.”

He turned and headed for the exit. Fiona called after him, but he kept walking. He couldn’t be close to Chase like this anymore, and it was time he stopped kidding himself.

***

Ben was at office hours on Wednesday grading papers. The space was tiny and cluttered, barely room for his heavy wooden desk and mismatched bookshelf. The faint but distinct smell of aging paper hung in the air, but sharp sunlight spilled in through the large window. Beyond, the tiny pink blooms of redbuds floated on the breeze.

A knock came on his door. He looked up to see Chase standing there looking sexy as hell in ripped jeans and a Henley shirt that stretched tight across his pecs.

“What can I do for you, Mr. Coltrane?”

“I have a question about As You Like It.” He sauntered over with the door still open, but the hungry look in his eyes said Shakespeare was the last thing on his mind.

In a low voice, Chase continued, “I hate the way you walked out on Monday. And because I can’t even call you, everything is unresolved between us.”

Ben’s chest collapsed. He hated doing this to Chase, keeping him hanging when he was clearly struggling with uncertainty. But what could Ben do? He couldn’t make promises when he might not be able to keep them. Ben wasn’t in control of this situation any more than Chase was.

And even worse, because of the risk involved, they couldn’t discuss their predicament with anyone else, either. They were left alone to stew about it in their own heads.

“That’s a good question,” Ben pretended to answer. “Rosalind and Orlando experience a great deal of confusion during their courtship, but everything works out for them in the end.”

Chase rolled his eyes. “The lack of contact is driving me crazy.”

“Yes, Rosalind is frustrated she can’t reveal her true identity and declare her love for Orlando. But she knows it isn’t safe to do that.”

“Would it really so be so bad if we called each other once in a while—”

“That wouldn’t be prudent. Rosalind’s disguise is her protection.”

Chase nodded. “Yeah. I get it. I just hate that things have to be like this.”

“Orlando is lovesick to the point of being ridiculous at times, but he’s very lovable.”

“Ha, ha,” Chase said, a bright expression on his face.

Ben smiled back at him. “Will you be at rehearsal tonight, Mr. Coltrane?”

“I’ll be there, Professor.” Chase rose and headed for the door, giving Ben a backward glance and smile.

***

Chase sat in a small conference room at the LBGT center with one of the peer counselors. Jake, his name was, and he was a cute little blond thing who probably drove half the gay men on campus crazy. Not Chase’s type, but definitely hot.

Chase looked around, hardly knowing where to begin. The room was modern and spacious with a blond wood table and ergonomic chairs. “This is confidential, right?”

“Every word.”

“Good. I need to stay in the closet a while longer—I’m not comfortable discussing why. But I’ve fallen for a guy for the first time, and it’s weird, this shift in my identity. I’m almost thirty—never suspected this about myself before. Is that normal?”

“There is no normal. Especially if you’re bisexual, you might realize it a little later in life. I mean, the Navy isn’t a place that’s conducive to exploring your sexuality, right?”

Chase grinned. “I spent a lot of nights at a construction site sleeping in a one-person pup tent. Not much privacy there.” He rubbed his palms on his thighs, the texture of his jeans rough on his hands. “It’s strange I’m not more freaked out. Instead, it’s like everything has clicked into place. As if something has been lurking in the back of my mind, just out of reach, and I finally get it. I’m in love with an amazing man who’s also in love with me, so why would I be unhappy about that? I realize there will be challenges, but life is full of challenges.”

Jake nodded. “If you’re comfortable with this change in your status, that’s great. Just be aware, as I’m sure you are, that the world isn’t always safe for LGBT people—”

“Yeah, but I was trained in hand-to-hand combat by the most powerful military the world has ever seen. I’m more concerned about…I don’t know how to describe it. It’s like going through a second puberty. All of a sudden, I’m obsessed with thoughts of sex with men. This new part of myself refuses to turn off, and I can’t compartmentalize my sexuality the way I used to.”

“That’s not uncommon when men realize they’re bi.”

“But it’s a problem. I’ve always behaved responsibly when it comes to sex, and now I’m afraid I’m losing control. The guy I want to date…well, we can’t be together right now. I should be able to accept that. Instead, I’m pushing for more with him. Even though I know things could be bad for him if we take this further. It’s not like me. I’d be devastated if I did anything that hurt him—but it’s like a need, a compulsion. Like I’m fifteen years old again and have no control over my erections.”

“But you do have control, right? I mean, this isn’t some pathology. You just really want to be with him.”

Chase hung his head and stared at the linoleum, at the maroon and teal star pattern. Jake was right. Chase had to be smart about this. If Ben was fired over their relationship, how would they ever come back from that? Ben would never forgive him. Since Ben was the one in authority, he would bear the brunt of the consequences, even if Chase initiated it.

“I’ve got to do better,” Chase said at last.

“I know patience can be difficult when you’re discovering this new side of yourself. But you still have to be smart about it, right?”

“Right. I can do that.” Chase rose and shook Jake’s hand, his head clearer than it had been in a while. But it meant he had to stay away from the man he loved, like Ben wanted. Which was not the answer Chase had been hoping for at all.

***

Chase stood on a stepladder on Friday, painting the interior backdrop. The canvas was attached to a self-standing wooden triptych frame, Chase’s own design. Painting each stone of the arches was tedious, but he wanted to make sure he got the light and shadow just right.

The sound of the backstage door opening turned his head in that direction. Anticipation coiled in his stomach and sent a thrill into his chest. He watched, hoping to see Ben, but instead Melissa came into sight. He had to swallow down the disappointment that gathered in his throat, which was heavier than it should have been.

His desire for Ben wove through every moment, leaving him restless and moody. Painting was a good distraction, but whenever thoughts of Ben entered his mind, his whole body ached for the man.

Why two consenting adults couldn’t be together just made no sense to him. It wasn’t like in the military, where the chain of command could be compromised. National security wasn’t at risk here. They were two men who happened to have a student-teacher relationship that would soon be over.

He pasted on a smile for Melissa’s sake. “Hey, Meliss. Why haven’t you left for spring break yet?”

She set down her backpack, a quilted black leather one with a Calvin Klein label. “Asheville is a long drive. I’m leaving first thing in the morning. What about you, darlin’?”

“I’m going up the coast to see my folks in Wilmington this weekend, but other than that, I’m planning to hang around campus, maybe finish up the painting here.”

“It looks beautiful so far. Even better than I imagined.”

“The real test is how it looks from the audience.”

She nodded. “Are you ready to take a break, hon, get some dinner?”

“Oh, thanks, but I got a sandwich from Giuseppe’s.”

“Maybe another time, then. I was thinkin’, after spring break…could we go out to dinner one night, just the two of us?” Behind her sleek confidence, that eager, entreating look was in her eyes again.

Shit. He was going to have to do this. He was going to have to tell her, once and for all, that he wasn’t interested in her that way. He hated to do it, because he liked her and valued her friendship. But even if he weren’t with Ben—or promised to him, if not technically with him—there would never be anything between Chase and Melissa.

The backstage door opened again, and this time, the sound of Ben’s laughter preceded his appearance. Dr. Leonard was with him, and they were smiling and joking together. His eyes sparkled, and he looked so happy and sexy that Chase’s breath caught. That’s the way Chase wanted to see Ben all the time.

Chase set down his brush and descended the ladder. He took a few steps toward the professors, but didn’t dare get too close. “What do you think so far?” he asked them.

“Oh, Chase, that’s brilliant!” Dr. Leonard said. “The arches have so much depth. They’ve got a look of authenticity about them.”

“Thanks.” He hazarded a glance at Ben, looking for his opinion. The man made eye contact, and Chase melted. A glance from Ben made Chase’s dick hard and his heart soft and gooey, like a teenager with a crush. And Chase realized he must look exactly like that, rocking back and forth with his fingers curled in his belt loops and a big, stupid grin on his face.

He stilled and adopted a more manly stance, crossing his arms across his chest. “What about you, Professor Silver?”

“Good job,” was all he said.

Chase would have been disappointed, except Ben was looking at him with such a combination of emotions that it was impossible to dissect them.

At last Ben put a hand on Chase’s shoulder. “I’m proud of you.” The warmth of that hand, and the depth of feeling in Ben’s voice, made the rest of the world disappear for a moment. It was all Chase could do not to fall into his arms. But Ben quickly pulled his hand away, breaking the spell.

Chase was so done with this. There had to be a way for them to date openly. He wasn’t putting up with this nonsense until the end of the semester. They had a whole week in front of them with no classes, no responsibility, and they ought to be spending it together.

“Oh, Professor Silver,” Melissa said, “I bought those candles, you know, the ones we talked about? They’re in my backpack.” She unzipped it and took out the props, showing them to Ben.

Dr. Leonard pulled Chase aside. “Nice job on your midterm. I was a little anxious about favoritism after Melissa’s lecture,” she said in low tones, a crooked grin breaking out over her face. “But you really do have a better grasp on this material than some grad school students I’ve encountered. You sure you don’t want to change majors?”

“I’m flattered, but in case you haven’t noticed, I like working with my hands.”

“Yes, I have noticed. You’re a man of many talents.” She sighed. “Well, I’ve got to get ready for a flight to Cancun tomorrow, so I’m out of here. Enjoy your time off. Don’t work too hard.”

“Thanks. Have a good time in Mexico.”

“I intend to.” She called to Ben and Melissa, “Have a good break, you two.” They waved and said their goodbyes as she headed out the door.

Chase sauntered over to the others.

“What do you think?” Melissa asked him, handing him a candle.

“One hundred percent better than the crappy ones we used in The Tempest.”

“Thank you,” she replied. “Now I don’t feel so bad spending fifty dollars on them.”

“Fifty dollars!” Chase turned to Ben and said jokingly, “That’s like, five cars we slaved to get clean.”

“Maybe we should increase the price of the car wash to fifteen dollars next year.”

“Next semester, you mean.”

“I don’t know if I can deal with twenty guys horsing around with hoses twice a year.”

Chase laughed. “Nice double entendre, Professor.”

Ben glared at him. “I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

Chase just shook his head.

“So, Chase,” Melissa said. “We were talkin’ earlier…”

His face fell. He went rigid, unsure how to respond. He should just be a man and tell her the truth, but with Ben standing there, it was incredibly awkward.

Her eyes lost their luster, and her lips flattened. “Never mind. We’ll talk another time.”

Chase felt bad at the cool, efficient tone in her voice. He didn’t want to hurt her, but—damn, he was an idiot.

“I’ll just put these in the prop room.” With a false cheerfulness, she gathered up the candles. “Y’all have a good break, now.”

“Have a good time in Asheville,” Chase called after her, but she walked away quickly without looking back.

Ben crossed his arms and shook his head, then looked at Chase sideways. “She’s got a thing for you, you know.”

“That’s too bad, because I’ve got a thing for you.” Leaning in, he said in Ben’s ear, “And it’s in my pants.”

“Behave yourself.”

“I’m tired of behaving myself. What if I talked to the dean—”

“We’ve discussed this—”

“Not the dean of faculty. The dean of students.”

Ben met his gaze, looking at him intently. This time, he had the guy’s interest.

“I tell him I’m interested in asking out a professor, and find out what would be involved with that—how we could start a relationship that’s sanctioned by the college.”

Ben stroked his beard. “That might work. But they still wouldn’t let us date as long as you’re in my class.”

Chase shrugged. “Why not? Dr. Leonard is grading me, and she’s already dazed by my brilliance.”

Ben chuckled. “I’m dazed by your brilliance, too.”

Chase grabbed Ben by the belt loops and pulled him closer. “I want to spend spring break with you.”

Ben’s lips parted. “We can’t do that. We can’t risk anyone finding out until after you talk to the dean. The administration building is shut down for a week—he’s probably traveling, like everyone else.”

“Come to Wilmington with me. There, we won’t have to worry about being seen together.”

“It’s tempting…”

“Everything about you is tempting.” Chase leaned in to kiss him.

Ben pulled back. “Babe, be reasonable. We’re so close now.”

“We are—we’re so close, and I’m so hard. If we pack up now, we could drive to Wilmington tonight and get a hotel room.”

Ben groaned and offered no more resistance. Chase brushed their lips together. Ben’s mouth was soft and yielding, but only for a moment.

He pulled back and ran his hands along Chase’s shoulders. “Babe, we can’t do this here—”

He broke off, his eyes wide with panic. Chase spun and his chest crashed.

Melissa stood with her arms crossed, her mouth tight, her eyes hard. “Sorry, gentlemen, I forgot my backpack.” She picked it up and left without another word.

Chapter 5                    

Ben had no one to blame but himself. He woke up early Saturday morning and cocooned himself in the thick comforter, trying to block out the world. But it was no use. The world would come for him soon enough.

The night before, after Melissa left, Chase had insisted they’d find a way to fix it. But what could they do? If Melissa went to Dean Krychek, which she would almost surely do, Ben would be facing a disciplinary hearing. If he managed to keep his job, he certainly wouldn’t be allowed to date Chase until he graduated.

At this point, he didn’t know which he would choose. Wait two years until he and Chase could be together, or find a new job. Tenure-track positions in his field were difficult to come by. Adjunct positions barely paid a living wage.

There was a real possibility that he would have to give up teaching altogether.

All because of a kiss.

Something seemed very wrong about that. He and Chase were in love. Maybe they hadn’t been a couple long, but they’d been friends first, and Ben already knew he didn’t want to live without the man.

Couldn’t live without him.

He shuffled into the kitchen and started the coffee. He’d forbidden Chase to call him, but checked his phone anyway. Nothing from Chase, which actually made him feel worse.

He should warn Fiona. But he couldn’t do that on the off chance Melissa stayed silent. It was unbearable, knowing that his future was on the line, and he had no control over the outcome.

Contacting Melissa was the worst thing he could do. She deserved better from him than that. Any attempt to sway her would be seen as undue pressure. And he’d told Chase not to contact her, either.

It would be a long week, waiting and wondering. And he didn’t know when he and Chase could be together again outside a classroom.

His gut coiled into a tight knot. He wanted to throw up, but his stomach was empty. How had he managed to fuck up his life this badly? He couldn’t blame Chase. Chase may have initiated the interactions between them, but Ben could have stopped them at any point.

He sank into a chair. He couldn’t talk to anyone about this, which made it worse. He was utterly alone. His mind kept going over the events, but he couldn’t find any solution.

He was fucked.

The fact that a twenty-nine-year-old male student had pursued him, rather than him pursuing an eighteen-year-old girl, ought to work in his favor. He might lose his tenure, though, which would be a huge blow.

It all seemed rather unfair. He knew what he’d done was wrong—the sex part in particular—but not so wrong that it should destroy his career. He wasn’t a predator. He’d fallen in love.

But anyone could use that argument. It wasn’t proof. A cynical person wouldn’t see it as a mitigating circumstance. No, Chase asserting that he had initiated every instance of physical contact between them was Ben’s only defense. Other than a handshake or a pat on the shoulder, Ben hadn’t touched Chase unless Chase had touched him first.

It was something, but whether it would be enough to save Ben’s job remained to be seen. In the meantime, all he could do was wait.

***

“Not hungry?” Chase’s mother asked him across the dining room table. Her brow wrinkled with concern.

A slender woman with graying hair brightened with highlights, she looked damn good for someone in her sixties who hadn’t lived an easy life. Leaving her family behind in a war-torn country with a man she hardly knew had taken a lot of courage. He’d never known anyone more determined.

He could use her advice right now.

He looked over at his father. His hair was white and still cut in a close-cropped military style. For an old guy, he was more fit than most men Chase’s age, and mentally sharper. He could be brusque and demanding on the outside, but his warm heart had always brought Chase comfort when he needed it.

Though his brothers were all coming for Sunday dinner the next day, today it was only the three of them. He was happy for the time alone. He had so much to tell them, he hardly knew where to begin.

Maybe it would be better coming out to just his parents before involving his brothers. Less to deal with all at once. He had no idea how his parents would react, but they’d always been supportive in the past.

“Sorry, Mom, lunch is great. It’s just, a situation came up at school.” He pressed his lips together. “It’s…complicated.”

“Everything all right with your grades, son?” his father asked.

“Yeah, nothing like that. Although…well, it could potentially be bad. I might have to change schools.”

“What happened?” his mother asked, eyes wide with concern.

He shook his head. Tension gripped his stomach. He hated to admit this to them, to disappoint his parents this way.

“I’ve gotten involved with a professor. I didn’t plan it—I fell in love before I knew it was happening. We tried to avoid being alone together, but…well, yesterday, someone saw us kissing. It was my fault. I initiated the kiss, and I know better. But…being apart is hell, and I just can’t do it anymore.”

“Now, Chase,” his dad said, “you were in the Navy for eight years—”

“Dad, it’s different. Lives aren’t at risk. Another professor is grading me so there’s no conflict of interest. I swear this college has got their head up their ass where this policy is concerned. It doesn’t allow for a student who’s almost thirty with years of life experience, who’s not subject to the undue influence of a hot teacher. I know I’m in love. I know I want to be with him—”

He tensed, then sat back in his chair. He gave his parents a moment to let that sink in before saying, “And yes, I’m in love with a man.”

His father scowled and started to speak, then closed his mouth again. He leaned back and crossed his arms. Finally, he leaned forward and said, “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell was repealed before you left the service, son. You didn’t have to keep this a secret from us.”

“I only just figured it out myself a few weeks ago. I’ve never felt this way about anyone.”

His father nodded thoughtfully.

His mother spoke quickly, her voice taut. “Is it possible you feel that way because it’s a new experience? Maybe you should slow down.”

Chase huffed. “Believe me, it would be difficult to go much slower than we have been. We can’t even talk on the phone because the records could be used as evidence in a hearing. Ben could lose his job over this. It would kill me if that happened.”

His mom leaned toward him. “Like you say, this rule isn’t really meant for a case like yours. You’re a grown man. If they fire your teacher for this, they’re stupid.”

Chase smiled. “I agree.”

His father shook his head. “How did you end up gay?”

“Bi,” Chase corrected.

His mother tilted her head. “I saw a documentary about a gay man who was the youngest of five brothers. They said it sometimes happens that way. The more older brothers you have, the more likely you are to be gay.”

He raised his brows. “Really?”

“When you never had a long-time girlfriend, I wondered if maybe…” She gave him a little smile.

“You suspected I was gay?”

“A mother has certain instincts. I raised three boys before you—you were different. Less aggressive, more cooperative. You were my little helper.” She smiled, so much love and pride in her eyes that Chase had to swallow down the emotion in his throat.

“S0 when can we meet this young man?” his father asked. “Well. I assume he’s a young man.”

Chase smiled so hard his face hurt. “He’s thirty-three. Jewish. I hope that isn’t a problem.”

His mother laughed. “Your Granny, God rest her, never accepted that I was Buddhist. I went to church to make her happy—I was in a new country and desperate to fit in. But it never quite suited me. I’m still Buddhist at heart. Whatever your boyfriend believes, that’s fine with me.”

“Twice as many holidays to celebrate,” his dad said. “Just don’t ask me to eat matzoh.”

“So you two are cool with all this? I’m bisexual, I could be expelled for dating my professor—”

“They won’t expel you.” His mother waved her hand.

“Chase, you’ve given me so many reasons to be proud,” his father said. “What sort of man would I be if I judged you? I knew when you were eighteen that I’d raised you right. The choices you make are yours. I’m not going to question them.”

Chase sat in shocked silence. During his years in the military, he’d received promotions, honors, and commendations that meant the world to him. But nothing had ever touched him like hearing those words of approval from his dad.

***

Tuesday, Ben sleepwalked through his house to the kitchen. He’d stayed in bed late because he’d barely slept, overwhelmed with worry, but he’d finally given up on getting rest. Coffee. He needed coffee.

He nearly walked into a wall, he was so exhausted. Three days of this were taking their toll. The weather was bright and warm, the beach was blocks away, and he barely had the energy to leave his house.

And he missed Chase. Fuck, how he missed him.

The ring of the doorbell startled him. Not like it was too early for visitors, but who could it be? Most of the people he knew were on vacation.

Chase.

Surely he wouldn’t just show up, would he? They couldn’t be seen together. Could. Not.

The bell rang again. Ben rushed forward, hoping his boyfriend hadn’t been foolish enough to drop by yet wishing it was him all the same. He looked through the sidelights and relief nearly knocked him over. There was his sexy sailor in a tight T-shirt that showed every ripple of muscle. And in that moment, nothing else mattered.

He fought for control. He couldn’t allow himself to make this situation worse. The nice, comfortable life he’d spent years building for himself could crumble around him if he didn’t play this right.

He opened his front door and drank in that handsome face, skin golden in the sunlight. Ben stood in the doorway. With a shaky voice, he said, “You shouldn’t be here.”

“Fuck that.” Chase brushed past him and went inside.

Ben pressed his fingertips to his forehead. He closed the door, feeling helpless. He should make Chase go, but what good would it do? It was only a matter of time. The two were just incapable of staying away from each other.

Being in love did that to people.

“I’ve got an idea.” A grin broke across Chase’s face. For a moment, it almost gave Ben hope. Almost.

Chase continued, “I was reading the college’s fraternization policy, and it said something about how professors couldn’t have sex with students they weren’t married to. So I was thinking…” He pulled a ring out of his pocket and got down on one knee.

Ben’s heart rose but fell again just as quickly. At the eager look in the guy’s face, Ben chuckled, releasing some of the tension in his chest. It was an amazing gesture, and Chase was right—at least the college couldn’t stop them from being together if they were married. But it was completely absurd for them to consider marriage this early in their relationship, and frankly, an engagement wouldn’t help him in a hearing.

“What do you say?” Chase asked.

“I’m overwhelmed that you would consider doing this for me.”

“It’s not for you. It’s for us. I love you, Dr. Benjamin Silver. Will you marry me?”

“Chase, it’s too soon.”

Chase stood. “It’s not. This isn’t an impulse—I’ve thought about it carefully. I want to spend the rest of my life with you, so why not get married?”

“We barely know each other.”

“We know each other better than my parents did when they got married just before my dad shipped out of Vietnam. They’ve been together more than forty years, and they’re as much in love as any two people I know.”

“I can’t let you do this. Maybe you just think you love me because you’re used to seeing me in a classroom setting, not in real life—”

Chase interrupted him with a kiss.

“I’m not careless or impulsive. I’m a grown man, and I know what I feel. I’m in love with you for real. And I want to marry you for real. Sure, if we weren’t in this situation, I wouldn’t be in such a rush. But damn it, what I feel is forever. I could date you for a month or a year or ten years, and I wouldn’t be any more sure than I am right now.”

Ben pulled him close and rested his forehead against Chase’s neck. He wanted this. He was certain, too. He loved Chase, would always love Chase. He’d dated enough men to know that this was forever.

His chest broke open and his tears flowed. It was an amazing sense of relief to know they didn’t have to wait anymore—they could take an active step to secure their future. No matter what happened, the college couldn’t take this away from them. This was theirs.

Chase kissed his forehead. “Say yes, Ben.”

Ben swallowed hard. “Yes.”

Chase laughed, a happy, exuberant sound. “You mean it?”

“Yes, I mean it.”

Chase kissed him again. “So I’m thinking we should take the next flight to Vegas.”

Ben stared. “You mean get married…now?”

“Yes, now. Before Monday. So it’s a done deal when classes are back in session. If Melissa goes to the dean, it’ll be too late.”

Of course Chase was right. It was the only solution.

The reality of it washed over him like a surfer wiping out. They were getting married. Like, tonight. Or maybe tomorrow, depending on their flight schedule. But definitely no later than tomorrow.

Chase and I are getting married.

Married.

His mom was going to kill him.

She was a typical Jewish mother, eager for him to settle down. Preferably with a nice Jewish boy, but after she got over the initial disappointment, she’d absolutely fall in love with Chase. His dad, too. They wouldn’t be happy about missing the wedding, but maybe he and Chase could throw a nice reception for family and friends over the summer.

Fuck. This was happening. Right fucking now.

“We’ve got to pack,” Ben said, breaking out of the daze that had settled over him.

“Done. I was in the Navy for eight years. I can pack in five minutes. My suitcase is in the car.”

Ben nodded. “So, then, you can make the reservations while I pack? You can use my credit card.”

“Hell, yes. Let’s do this thing.”

***

Chase followed Ben inside the hotel room and closed the door. Well, room wasn’t the right word. It was an amazing suite, the kind that rock stars trashed when they were on the road. Kitchen, full bar, separate bedroom, whirlpool tub, two giant TVs.

It was midnight and he was punchy, but sleep was not on the agenda right now. He had important business to take care of first. Business that involved his cock and Ben’s ass.

No more waiting.

Ben took off his yarmulke. Chase grinned at him and said, “Wasn’t I supposed to carry you over the threshold?”

“Or maybe I should have carried you over the threshold.”

Chase crossed his arms. “I’m bigger than you.”

“You certainly are.”

Ben massaged Chase’s crotch, and he moaned. The contact made him instantly hard, jolts of excitement shooting all through his body. Finally, finally, they were alone, with nothing to stop them.

It had been a long day, catching a noon flight out of Wilmington, connecting in Charlotte, getting to Las Vegas at seven local time, grabbing a quick bite because they were famished, filling out the paperwork, and finding a chapel. They were married by an Elvis impersonator. It was perfect.

Chase grabbed Ben’s ass. “Unless you have any objection, I’m going to fuck you now.”

“Please.” Ben’s voice was low and breathless, almost a prayer.

Chase unknotted Ben’s tie. “We’ll take this slow, and once I’m inside you, I’ll ride you harder than you’ve ever been ridden before.” He leaned in for a kiss, then nipped Ben’s lower lip. Ben gave a shaky little cry.

Without breaking contact, they made their way into the bedroom. He buried his head in Ben’s neck as he unbuttoned and pushed the shirt off Ben’s arms, kissing and suckling the tender flesh above his collarbone. “I’m going to kiss you in ways you’ve never been kissed.”

Ben held onto him, one hand at his waist, the other at the back of his neck. “I want you naked so I can savor every inch of you.”

“Naked is good.” Chase smiled at him, and Ben shuddered. They undressed quickly.

Chase opened his suitcase and pulled out the lube and condoms. Then he got one more thing—his Dixie-cup service hat—and set it on top of his head.

Ben laughed. “Your sailor’s cap! You remembered.”

Chase tossed the supplies onto the bed. “Hell yeah I did. I’ve been fantasizing about it ever since you mentioned it.”

“Me, too. You look amazing like that, by the way.” Ben’s eyes raked Chase’s nude body.

The feel of his lover’s gaze on him stoked his desire. Ben’s warm olive skin was gorgeous in the dim light, his body slender with firm pecs and abs. The heavy ache in Chase’s cock increased.

Chase stalked toward him and kissed his shoulder, then slipped behind him to taste the back of his neck. Hands firmly on Ben’s arms, Chase trailed his tongue along Ben’s spine, leaving Ben to breathe in trembling gasps.

Working lower, Chase got on his knees. “Your ass is so beautiful.” He rained tiny kisses across Ben’s buttocks as he reached around and grabbed the man’s cock.

Ben cried out and was soon begging, the breathy sound bringing a smile to Chase. Turning a man like Ben to a quivering mess of need sent a surge of power rushing through him.

He parted Ben’s cheeks and found his sweet hole, brushing his tongue against it in small, gentle strokes. He loved the earthy taste of him. Probing with his tongue, he plunged the tip into that tightness. The thought of being inside him constricted his balls and sped up his heart rate.

“Turn around,” he said in a gravelly voice. Ben turned and Chase found himself facing that rosy-red cock. He’d never sucked a man before but he was eager to try.

Ben stroked Chase’s hair. “I love you so.”

“Back at you.” He fisted that thick erection, running his thumb along a vein, then flicked his tongue across the salty tip.

Ben pulled in a breath and threw back his head.

Chase took him into his mouth, swirling his tongue around the shaft before swallowing it down. Ben’s body shook, and Chase took him deeper. He couldn’t get enough of the sweet taste of him, the silky feel of his skin.

He’d dreamed of this every night, planned out every moment. There were a thousand things he wanted to do to Ben, and he wouldn’t be able to do them all tonight. But he didn’t want this to end. Giving Ben pleasure filled him with a sense of peace that nothing ever had before.

With a groan, Ben pulled out. “I’ll come if you keep doing that.”

“We can’t have that,” Chase said as he stood. He suckled Ben’s earlobe. “I want to be inside you when you come.”

Ben turned his face and kissed him deeply. Chase grabbed his ass and held him close, fitting their bodies together, skin to skin, heart to heart.

Chase walked him to the bed and pulled down the covers. “Get on your back for me?”

“Hell yes.” Ben lay flat at the edge of the bed, feet resting on the mattress, legs wide. Chase groaned at the sight of him. “You’re so beautiful, babe.”

“I can’t wait to feel that huge cock inside me.”

“We’ve already waited too long.” Chase stroked Ben’s thighs, the supple skin stretched over taut muscle. He opened the lube and warmed it on his fingers before rubbing it against Ben’s pucker. He pushed two digits inside up to the first knuckle. When Ben’s body offered no resistance, he pushed further.

Ben moaned. “Oh, hell. That’s so good, babe.”

Chase fucked him with his fingers a while just to torment him. Then, when he was sure Ben was ready, he suited up and added lube to the condom. “I’ve never done this with a man before, so tell me if I hurt you.”

“Need you.”

Chase lined up their bodies and pushed forward. Ben hissed. With gentle strokes, Chase worked him until fully seated, engulfed in that tight channel. Then, he leaned forward and kissed him. “You feel so good, babe. I want to pound you until you scream.”

“Do it.”

Chase looped his elbows around Ben’s knees to get better access. He started slow and built up a rhythm until their bodies slapped hard together.

“Yes, like that,” Ben urged. “Give it to me, sailor boy.”

Chase sped up. “Take my cock. Take it all.” He fisted Ben’s shaft and squeezed. Ben trembled, and Chase jacked him for a few quick strokes. That was all it took. Ben came, jizz shooting over their bodies. The sight of it set Chase off, and he shouted his release.

Everything went white as he thrust the last few strokes into his lover’s body, prolonging the orgasm. Then he collapsed on Ben, sweat and semen mixing together as Chase kissed him, their tongues tangling and tasting each other.

“Holy hell,” Chase said. “I’ve never come that hard. You’re amazing. You just do it for me, babe.”

“Mm,” Ben said lazily, “you were perfect.”

“Yeah?” A grin pushed into his cheeks. “Fuck, I love you. I can’t wait to tell everyone you’re my boyfriend.”

Ben chuckled.

“What?” Chase scowled, then laughed. “Oh, shit, we’re married. How the hell did that happen?”

“You proposed, remember?”

“I do.” Chase kissed him. “And I will. For the rest of my life.”

Chapter 6                    

“Ben! Come in.” Anna Krychek strode forward to shake his hand Monday morning in her office. She was tall and broad, her short dark hair tinged with auburn, wearing a navy suit tailored to her figure. As she sat at her desk, she gestured him toward a chair, then sipped her coffee. “Sorry, I’m still booting up my computer. What was so important you had to see me first thing after spring break?”

The knots in his stomach tightened. When I leave this office, I might not have a job. “I got married.”

“That’s wonderful! Congratulations.”

“Thanks, but…you might not think it’s so wonderful when you hear this next bit.”

Her face fell. “You didn’t.”

“He’s in my Shakespeare in Performance class.”

Her lips parted. “In one of your classes? Ben! You’re killing me here.” She sat back and tapped her forefinger against her lips. “How are you going to handle his grades?”

“I’m co-teaching that class with Fiona.”

Anna nodded. “That’s one problem solved, at least. I hate to ask, but I need to know how serious this is. Did you have sex with him before the wedding?”

“Depends on how you define sex.”

“Don’t do that to me, Ben. Any sexual contact?”

“Yes, once. No penetration.”

“I don’t think that’s a mitigating factor.” She typed on her computer. “I assume he’s over eighteen?”

“He’s here on the GI Bill. He’s twenty-nine.”

“That’s better, at least. Let me make notes of all this as soon as I get the document open, and then I’ll have more questions for you.”

“Will there be a hearing?”

“Possibly. I hope not. George will need to talk to him as soon as possible—that’s the responsibility of the dean of students.”

“Chase initiated the relationship, Anna. I told him we couldn’t see each other. The fact is, we fell in love without ever violating the fraternization policy. But once we were in love, we couldn’t stay apart. We tried, but we couldn’t manage it.”

“You should have come to me, Ben.”

“I was afraid you’d say I couldn’t date him until he graduated. I thought if we could just get through this semester…I’m sorry. I handled this badly. I know I was wrong.”

“Ya think?” She crossed her arms. “I don’t know of a single education institution in this country that would allow a professor to date a student in a class he’s actively teaching.”

“We did try.”

“I’m sure you did,” she said softly, then turned to her computer screen.

“I’m sorry to put you through this, Anna. But I’m not sorry I married him. It was the only solution.”

“Pretty sure it wasn’t. This isn’t Romeo and Juliet—you’re not teenagers. There was a right way to handle this. In fact, it’s in the policy. Relationships between faculty and students must be disclosed immediately. I’m not an ogre. We’d have figured something out.” She shook her head. “Shithead. You owe me for all this paperwork I’ll have to do. Oh—and if you fuck another student, you’re fired.”

***

In his office, Ben gathered up the supplies for his Shakespeare class. Things had gone well with Anna, but that was no guarantee there wouldn’t be a hearing. A lot would depend on George’s discussion with Chase. Since Ben never sexually harassed him, that shouldn’t be a huge hurdle. But the ordeal wasn’t over yet.

A knock came on his office door, and he looked up to see Melissa. “Professor, do you have a minute?”

“Of course. Come in.”

She stepped inside and shut the door. “I’ve been doing a lot of thinking. My whole life, I’ve tried to do the right thing. When I saw you and Chase together, I was shocked, and I didn’t know how to react.”

“I’m sorry to put you in that position—”

“No, it’s fine. Really, just fine. Because it was clear you two are in love. I realized the right thing was for you to be together, not for the college to tear you apart because of a stupid rule. You and Chase are good people. Y’all deserve to be happy. So as long as you’re not responsible for Chase’s grades, I don’t see any reason for me to do anything that would hurt the two of you.”

Emotion welled in his throat and he blinked back tears. He’d underestimated her. She really was a sweet girl. “I appreciate that, Melissa. But you should know, I told Dean Krychek myself this morning about Chase and me.”

“Oh my goodness, you should have talked to me first!”

“It’s all right. The thing I regret most is getting you caught up in this mess. That’s not fair to you.”

“They won’t fire you, will they?”

“Probably not. I’m hoping for a reprimand, which will probably mean no raise next year. Which sucks, but it’s a hell of a lot better than losing my job.”

“And what about you and Chase? Will they let you see each other?”

“Oh.” He laughed. “Sorry, I guess I didn’t mention…we got married.”

She looked at him with wide eyes. “Married! Why, that’s wonderful. I’m just going to have to give you a hug for that.”

He accepted her quick embrace.

“Well now,” she said, “I’ve got a class to get to, so I’d best be on my way.”

“See you in a few.”

As Melissa strolled out, Fiona stopped at his door. “Ready to go?”

“Sure, just let me get my briefcase.” He turned and picked up his bag, stuffing some notes inside.

“How was your break?” she asked.

“Good,” he said as they headed down the hallway. “Went to Vegas, married a certain former petty officer—”

“You what!” She stopped short.

He turned and looked at her. “Just go with it, Fiona.”

“You sneaky son of a bitch.”

***

Chase arrived at the Shakespeare in Performance class early, hoping for a minute to talk to Melissa. He had to clear the air between them. He’d been shitty to her—he should have just told her in the beginning he wasn’t interested. He’d been cowardly, and that wasn’t like him.

The fact was, he didn’t understand women. Growing up with three brothers and serving in the Navy didn’t do much to teach him sensitivity. But he liked Melissa and wanted to salvage their friendship.

Bees buzzed in his stomach as she entered and he approached her. “Can I talk to you?” he asked.

She gave him a crooked grin. “I understand congratulations are in order.”

He blinked. What was she talking about? Had the rumor gotten out already, or did she mean something else?

She elbowed him. “I spoke to your husband.”

His face burned. He really felt like shit now. Chase should have been the one to tell her, though he understood why Ben had. “Oh.”

“Darlin’, it’s fine. I only wish I’d known sooner you were gay.”

“I’m not. I’m bi. I’ve always dated women until now. Ben just swept me off my feet.” He scowled. “Figuratively speaking, of course. I don’t want there to be any mistake. I pursued him. The entire time, he insisted it was inappropriate, and we couldn’t be together. But I was relentless.”

She laughed. “Oh, honey, if there’s a hearin’, you’ll have them eating out of your hand. You’re irresistible.”

“I am. I’m glad you can see that.”

“I’ll tell ’em so under oath if you want.”

The professors entered, and the class took their seats. When Ben started lecturing, all Chase could think about was how sexy the guy was, how he wanted his hands on him, to strip him naked…

He forced himself to focus. He was sitting there like an idiot, not participating in the discussion. That wasn’t like him, and he didn’t want Ben or Dr. Leonard to think he was going to start slacking off. He resolved to volunteer the next time he knew the answer.

“One question that persists,” Ben said, “is why Rosalind remains in disguise even after she arrives safely at Arden. Who can tell me what O’Hara says on the subject?”

Chase raised his hand, then realized he had no idea who O’Hara was. He pulled his hand back, but it was too late.

“Mr. Coltrane?” Ben said, calling on him.

Chase gave him his sexiest grin with the hopes of distracting him. “You mean we’re not going to hyphenate? Shouldn’t that be Mr. Coltrane-Silver?”

A confused hush fell over the classroom, and Ben shook with suppressed laughter. “Well, I guess there’s no point in trying to keep this quiet. Yes, Mr. Coltrane and I got married last week. I’ve talked to Dean Krychek about it, and I’ll be happy to talk to any of you during my office hours if you have concerns. Now, Mr. Coltrane, did you have anything to contribute other than disrupting my classroom?”

Chase bit his cheek. Might as well wing it. “Rosalind stays in disguise because she’s confused about her gender identity. She doesn’t relate to the prescribed roles for women, and dressing as a man feels more natural to her.”

“No, I’m sorry, that’s not O’Hara’s position. Did you even do the reading, Mr. Coltrane?”

“I skimmed it.” He shrugged. “Sorry, I was kind of busy. I got married last week.”

“You could have read it instead of sleeping on the red-eye back from Las Vegas.”

“You’re right. Sorry, Professor. I’ll do better next time.”

“You’d better. Or I might have to take disciplinary action.”

Chase grinned. “I’d like to see you try…”

The classroom erupted in laughter. Ben gestured for silence, his open palms pushing downward. “Sorry, that was my fault. But seriously, Chase, let’s try to keep this professional.”

“Yes, Dr. Silver.”

Melissa cleared her throat. “According to O’Hara, Rosalind likes the freedom that comes with dressing as a boy. As Ganymede, she can teach Orlando how to be a better suitor, in ways she couldn’t as herself. But in the end, she reaffirms tradition by setting the stage for four marriages.”

“That’s right,” Ben replied.

“Kiss-up,” Chase said to Melissa. “You’re just trying to get a better grade.”

She grinned and swatted his arm.

That friendly gesture reassured him. It looked like things would be okay between him and Melissa after all.

***

That night after rehearsal, Ben entered his house through the front door with Chase at his side. They hadn’t talked much about living arrangements yet, but since Ben was the one with a king-sized bed, his place seemed like a good choice for now.

“You want to watch TV or something?” Ben asked.

“We haven’t even been married a week. What kind of husband would I be if I wanted to watch TV?” Chase drew him into a deep kiss and started undressing him before they even made it to the stairs.

“How’d I get so lucky?” Ben asked.

“I’m the lucky one.”

“Seriously, you’re not. And when you say that, I worry you’re going to wake up one day and see I’m just a boring—”

Chase kissed him again. “You keep insisting that I’m not dumb. Well, maybe that’s why I fell in love with you. Because I like being with a smart man. Who’s also handsome, and has a tight ass I can’t wait to get my hands on. So let’s stop the talking and get to the fucking.”

“Such a sweet talker.”

“I can give you sweet talk if you want it. Pretty sure you prefer rough and dirty, though.” Chase’s hands found Ben’s balls through his clothes and gently squeezed.

In the bedroom, Chase pushed Ben down onto the bed and undressed. Ben slipped off his shoes and the rest of his clothes. He had just enough time to pull back the covers before Chase launched himself at him.

As they kissed, Ben rolled on top of him and lined up their cocks, rubbing them together. “You were very naughty in class today.”

Chase kissed the tip of his nose. “What are you going to do about it?”

“I have an idea, but I’m not sure you’ll like it.”

“Tell me.”

Ben kissed his mouth. “Bottom for me.”

Chase groaned and leaned his head back, exposing his neck for Ben to cover with teasing kisses. “No pressure,” Ben said.

Chase nipped at Ben’s collarbone. “Let’s do it. Tell me what a bad boy I’ve been.”

“Shit, Chase, I’m going to come before we even start if you keep talking like that.”

“Then I’ll just have to suck you until you’re hard again.”

Ben pinned Chase’s arms on either side of his head. “You’re going to be the death of me.”

“No. We’re going to have a long, happy life together.”

Ben continued to glide their cocks together. “My sailor boy is so big and hard.”

“For you? Always.”

“I’m going to fill you up and make you come like you never have before.”

“Please, babe. Stop teasing.”

“Teasing is the best part.”

“Not really.”

“You’ve been naughty, and teasing is part of the penalty.”

Chase moaned, eyes hooded with lust.

Ben kissed his way down Chase’s body, stopping at each nipple, tracing the lines of those magnificent abs with his tongue. When he finally reached that meaty cock, Chase writhed and shuddered. Ben licked from tip to taint, circling the head, sucking the balls. Chase thrust his hips off the bed, and still Ben held back from taking the rod into his mouth.

“Please, Ben,” he begged.

“Do you promise to be a good boy in the future?”

“Yes. Hell yes. Please!”

Ben swallowed him until the blunt head hit his soft palate, and Chase cried out. Ben picked up the pace, deep throating him and hollowing his cheeks until his big, strong sailor was whimpering with desire.

Ben pulled back and kissed Chase’s stomach. He got out the lube but left the condoms, since they’d both tested negative. Ben didn’t top often, but he enjoyed switching it up once in a while. This was his first time barebacking that way, though.

He swirled a copious quantity of lube around Chase’s tight rosette. “Is my sailor boy ready to pay the penalty for misbehaving?”

“Ohhh,” he groaned. “Yes, Professor, sir.”

Ben pushed a finger inside. Chase clenched around it. “Bear down as I push in, okay, babe?” He worked the finger in and out until Chase’s muscles softened, then added a second finger. “You’re doing great.”

“Feels good,” Chase murmured.

Ben curved his fingers, looking for Chase’s sweet spot. He knew right away when he found it, because the guy cried out like he was about to come.

“That’s amazing,” Chase said in a gravelly voice. “No wonder guys are so into this.”

“I want you to feel every bit of the pleasure you give me.”

When Chase finally relaxed enough, Ben moved over him, spreading his legs. The guy looked so sexy Ben wanted to plow into him, but he knew he needed to start slow. He poised his cock at Chase’s entrance and pushed in the tip. Chase gasped and Ben stilled. “Doing okay?”

“It’s…a lot.”

“Try bearing down.” The resistance eased. “Better?”

“Yeah. Better.”

“We can stop whenever you want. I can be happy if we never do this.”

“I want to try.”

Ben leaned down and kissed him. “Only if it’s for you and not for me.”

“I want to be with you this way.”

Ben caressed his husband’s cheek. “Can you take more?”

“Yeah.”

Ben kissed his lips, then pressed forward by millimeters.

***

Chase wasn’t sure what he’d gotten himself into. It didn’t hurt exactly, but it was a lot of pressure. Still, the way he’d felt with Ben’s fingers inside him—he wanted more of that.

He breathed, and Ben sank deeper inside him. This time, Ben brushed against Chase’s gland, and he saw stars. “Oh, wow.”

“Better?”

“Yeah. Just take it slow.”

Ben eased inside, and the most intense pleasure of Chase’s life pulsed through him. His body shook with it. “Oh, Ben. Yes babe, that’s it, just like that.”

Ben chuckled. “You’re super sensitive.” He pulled back, then slid in deeper this time. Something shifted, and soon Ben was immersed to the hilt.

The sense of fullness overwhelmed Chase—he’d never felt this close to anyone, and his heart swelled to barely fit his chest. Chase’s life had changed so much so fast, in the best possible way.

“That’s it, babe, you fill me so good.”

Ben picked up the pace, and pleasure radiated through Chase’s body. He’d be sore tomorrow, but he could not give a fuck. He’d never felt anything like this, and it was amazing.

“This is what you get for being naughty,” Ben said as he thrust inside with hard, punishing strokes.

“Yes,” Chase cried. “More. Please!” A wave crashed over him as Ben’s thick cock continued to stroke his gland. The orgasm rocked his body, and still Ben pounded into him until he reached his own climax, shooting deep inside Chase.

Their breathing slowed, and Chase floated in a sea of bliss. Ben leaned down and captured his lips. Chase grasped the back of Ben’s neck and held him in place, deepening the kiss.

“This is where I belong,” Chase said. “Here with you. Always.”

After traveling the world—and seeing more of it than a person should—for the first time in his life, he felt like he’d found a place he could call home.

Epilogue

Ben popped the cork on a bottle of champagne in a hotel room in Wrightsville Beach overlooking the ocean. After the wedding reception they’d held for family and friends, renewing their vows in an ecumenical ceremony, they’d decided to take a week’s vacation at a nice hotel. It was July, and they’d had to pay a fortune to get a decent room, but it was worth every penny.

Ben poured the sparkling wine into flutes. Bubbles rose as he carried the glasses to the bed, where Chase was lying down in boxers looking at his cell phone.

“What have you got there?” Ben asked as he set the champagne on the nightstand and crawled in next to his husband.

“Our wedding video. From Vegas. This has to be the goofiest thing I’ve ever seen.”

“Fake Elvis is a hoot.”

“He’s genuinely terrible as an Elvis impersonator, but I think that’s part of his schtick.”

Ben nodded. “I look like I’m high.”

“That’s because you were exhausted.”

“True. I’d barely slept, worrying I’d have to stay away from you in order to keep my job.”

“Yeah, but we outsmarted them.”

“You outsmarted them. Have I told you lately that you’re a genius?”

“I don’t know about that.” He paused the video and set down the phone, then ran a hand over Ben’s bare arm. “But I was smart enough to marry you.”

“And I’m incredibly lucky. I went to Vegas and hit the jackpot.”

Chase kissed him, and Ben snuggled up against him. He still couldn’t believe that the hottest man he’d met in real life was his.

Chase stroked Ben’s hair. “I’m glad the hearing is behind us.”

“Me too. It sucks having that reprimand on my record for the rest of my life, but I suppose it’ll be funny after we’ve been married for twenty years.”

“You’ve got tenure,” Chase said. “The reprimand won’t matter unless you make a habit of sleeping with students…”

“Never again.” Ben stroked his husband’s cheek. “From now on, there’s only you. My handsome sailor boy.”

***

Thank you for reading Temptation by Design! For more gay romance by Andrea Dalling, join her Fan List.

Excerpt from Up and Coming
Book 1 in the Coastal College Football series

Emmett doesn't have time to date. A college quarterback on a path to turning pro, he can't afford distractions. When he's blindsided by a growing attraction to his friend Jake, he fights it—rumors he's bisexual could wreck his draft prospects.

Biochem major Jake has had a straight-boy crush on Emmett since freshman year. He’s sure nothing can come of his longing—until a scorching kiss turns desire into hope.

When their secret threatens to come out, will Emmett give up Jake to protect his career—or risk everything for love?

“Come on, Amber, it’s not like that.” Emmett pulled from her grip. She’d been hovering around him all evening, and now she had cornered him in a dark upstairs hallway of the frat house. She was a close friend, and pretty, too—pouty red lips, heart-shaped face, soft umber-brown complexion—but pretty wasn’t what he was after.

Music thrummed from the dance floor below, vibrating through his Nike trainers. He had only planned to go to the party for an hour, have a beer, then get back to work on his English paper. But he and Waseem got to talking, and one beer turned into two. He didn’t give much thought to Amber, and he certainly didn’t expect her to follow him to his room.

“I can make you happy, baby,” she murmured, alcohol on her breath. He hadn’t noticed how much she had drunk, but it was probably more than she should’ve. And her friend Glenda had left earlier, so he should be a gentleman and walk her to her dorm. Which was bound to give her the wrong idea.

“I’m not looking for a girlfriend right now. I need to focus on football.” To be honest, he wasn’t sure why he had stopped dating. As gorgeous as Amber was, and as much as he liked her, he just wasn’t interested in her that way.

“Look, it’s late,” he said. “Let’s get you back to Harmony Hall so you can sleep it off.”

“I could sleep here,” she teased. “You won’t regret it.”

He gently clutched her shoulders and held her at arm’s length. “You know I care about you. We’re friends, but that’s all.”

He turned to the sound of footsteps. When Waseem rounded the corner, Emmett sighed in relief.

“There you are.” Waseem put his arm around Amber, guiding her toward the stairs. “I promised Glenda I’d make sure you got home okay.”

“I’m talking to Emmett,” she said, but didn’t resist.

“Emmett’s got a paper due on Monday. He’s busy.”

As they turned, Waseem looked over his shoulder at Emmett, who gave him a smile. His best friend had been saving him from overeager women since freshman year. Waseem was gay, so women generally didn’t give him the kind of grief they gave Emmett.

He headed to his room and considered firing up his laptop. It was well after midnight, though, so he decided to get up early instead. He had all day Sunday to finish his paper. That should be plenty of time.

Lying in bed, he couldn’t stop thinking about Amber. He had known her since freshman year—she was a sweet girl, and most guys would want to hit that hard. But he wasn’t in love with her, and hookups weren’t his thing.

So no matter how she flirted, he just couldn’t get into that. Being alone with his hand wasn’t an ideal choice, but the thought of being with Amber just to get off made him feel worse. Besides, she was clearly into him, and he didn’t want to hurt her.

He sat up and fluffed the pillow, pounding it with his fist before lying back down. He wanted intimacy but just couldn’t seem to feel that spark. Alone was better—no matter how much he hated it.

***

The commotion in the hallway interrupted Jake’s thoughts. It was Amber’s voice, louder than usual, which probably meant she’d been drinking.

He closed his genetics textbook. All those symbols and squiggly lines were making his vision swim anyway. He peered out the door to see Amber resting her head on Waseem’s shoulder, his arm around her as she shuffled along.

She looked tiny next to Waseem, but then so did most people. A wide receiver on the football team, he was tall with broad shoulders and biceps to die for.

“What am I doing wrong?” Amber moaned. “If you were straight, wouldn’t you want some of this?”

Jake stepped into the hallway and headed toward them. Amber came up and hugged him.

“Boy troubles?” he asked.

“Why won’t Emmett love me?”

“He’s not the one for you, hon. You’ve got to accept it and move on.”

It was the same refrain he had been telling himself since he met Emmett three years ago. Emmett Cross, charismatic star quarterback and all-around nice guy, was the only straight crush he’d never been able to shake.

Jake wasn’t normally one for lost causes. There was something about Emmett that wouldn’t let him go. Perfect body, strong, classic features, skin a rich, dusky brown. He melted every time he saw Emmett’s smile.

He could definitely relate to what Amber was going through.

“You’re a sweetheart,” he said to her. “Don’t pine after a guy who’s not interested. Find one who appreciates you.”

“I know you’re right.” She pulled back. “It’s just hard, you know? I think I love him.”

Jake nodded. He and Waseem walked her the rest of the way to her room and made sure she was okay. She wasn’t falling-down drunk, just sad drunk. And Jake was sad for her.

He invited Waseem into his room and got two sodas from the fridge, since Waseem didn’t drink. They sat a space apart on the bed and took a few sips before Jake asked, “You think Amber will be okay?”

“I don’t know why she’s torturing herself. Pretty girl like that would have no problem finding someone else. Emmett is hot, but…”

His voice trailed off as Jake swallowed hard, eyes misting. Amber’s sadness must have affected him more than he realized. He had let his guard down too far.

“Aw, man, not you, too.”

“Just a straight boy crush,” Jake said. “I’ll get over it.” He jutted out his chin and gave his friend a half smile. “Something about him is so…unattainable. That’s half the attraction.” Jake sank into his thoughts a moment, then said, “We should go out next Saturday. Find someone I actually can have.” He waggled his eyebrows suggestively.

“I’m in.” Waseem saluted him with his soda.

“Good. Because you’re the best wingman I’ve got.”

“That’s because I know what you like—and because we’re so different.” Waseem smirked. “Guys get a certain look in their eyes when they’re scoping out a twink like you.”

“I’m not a twink.” Jake’s voice was sharp. He hated when people call him that. Okay, so he was blond-haired and blue-eyed, barely five-nine with a slim runner’s build. And yeah, people described him as cute or even pretty. But he wasn’t dumb, and Waseem knew it.

“Twink is not an insult, dude. It’s just shorthand for a certain type. Your type. Embrace it.”

Jake bit his cheek. Maybe a happy-go-lucky guy like Waseem couldn’t understand why that word bugged Jake so much. He knew his friend didn’t mean anything by it, so he took another swig of his drink and let it go.

His gaze roamed over Waseem’s powerful arms, a T-shirt clinging to his sculpted upper body. People said the two would make a cute couple, but they’d never had that vibe. Jake could appreciate how gorgeous the guy was—soulful dark eyes, curly hair, light brown skin the color of sandstone.

But Waseem was warm and outgoing, while Emmett was cool and confident. That must be what Jake went for, because he got hard just thinking about it.

Thinking about Emmett.

***

On Sunday, Emmett was at Waseem’s rehashing the game from the day before. Their team, the Pirates, had won by a field goal, but Emmett didn’t feel good about a score that close. The pro scouts didn’t usually pay much attention to football at North Carolina Coastal College, but he knew they were watching him.

He needed to step it up.

The fact that he wasn’t dating removed distractions from his life. He had classes, he had football, and that was it. His head was clear so he could focus on what mattered.

“Martinelli is off his game this season,” Emmett said, referring to one of their wide receivers, a senior with no professional prospects. “I’d like to push Adams harder, see what he can do.” Brent Adams was a junior with real potential.

“Sounds like a good call,” Waseem said.

A knock on the open door turned Emmett’s head. It was Jake, blond hair damp from the shower. He was wearing a polo shirt and khaki shorts—Emmett knew it was a cliché about gay guys dressing neat, but in Jake’s case, it was true.

His clothes looked good on his slim build. Emmett spent so much time with big, muscular guys that Jake was a refreshing change. Buff, but more like a runner or a swimmer.

“Hey, um, y’all want to grab some dinner?” Jake mainly looked at Waseem as he said it, but then he caught Emmett’s eye. There was something nervous in that glance—a half smile, a blush in his cheek. Even after three years, the guy seemed intimidated by Emmett, and he didn’t know why.

It drove him a little crazy.

Sometimes when people looked at Emmett, all they saw was a big, muscular Black dude, and that scared them. Jake wasn’t like that, though. If he and Emmett had a couple of drinks together, he relaxed, and things were normal between them. But then, the next time Emmett saw him, the nerves came back, no matter how Emmett tried to put him at ease.

They decided to skip the cafeteria and went to a little Italian place just off campus, the kind with tablecloths and heavy silverware. The prices were good, and the marinara sauce was killer. They blissed out on the homemade pasta.

It was a slow night. The lights were low and Tony Bennett was playing. The waitress, a blonde in her forties, was elegant and friendly.

Jake had eased up a bit. He and Waseem were talking about their plans to go to a club the next Saturday night. Emmett’s stomach tightened. He felt kind of left out, even though he knew that wasn’t their intention.

“I guess you don’t go clubbing much,” Jake said.

Emmett’s throat went dry. “Yeah, I was in a long-distance relationship for so long…just never formed the habit, I guess.”

Jake raised his brows. “After being tied down all that time, I’m surprised you haven’t been chasing every woman on campus. Turning down Amber?”

“She, uh…” Emmett couldn’t find the words. “Amber’s not my type.”

Jake shook his head. Emmett knew what he was thinking. How could a beautiful girl like Amber not be every straight guy’s type?

The spark just wasn’t there, and Emmett couldn’t get into one-offs.

He sipped his beer and changed the subject. He and Waseem talked football for a while, and Jake’s eyes started to glaze over. Emmett gave him a smile. “We boring you?”

“Not boring, I just…don’t really understand half of what you’re saying.” His expression was bright now, radiant even. Something about the way he gazed at Emmett made him warm all over. Jake was a good-looking guy, and Emmett couldn’t help noticing how full and pink his lips were. Emmett hated to think of him wasting all that on a stranger at the bar with Waseem.

“Maybe I could join y’all Saturday night,” Emmett said, then squinted. Where did that came from? He didn’t remember having that thought, but now that it was out, he realized it was what he wanted. Straight guys went to gay bars with their friends sometimes. It was no big. “We can talk about something other than football.”

Jake’s eyes went wide, but Waseem just laughed. “Dude, what are you going to do once we pick up a couple of dates?”

“I can take a cab home. Or maybe I’ll ask Brent Adams if he wants to go.”

Waseem shrugged. “If you want.” But Jake still had that wide-eyed, fixed stare, and Emmett had no idea why.

“I’m not gay,” Emmett said. It was sharper and more defensive than he had meant it to be, and Jake flinched.

“I know,” Jake said.

Now Emmett felt like shit. Jake was a nice guy, and Emmett was only giving him reasons to be more nervous around him. And now, Emmett realized, he was feeling nervous around Jake.

What was that about? He was Emmett Cross, star quarterback, the best the college had ever seen. He had no reason to be nervous around anyone. But when this cute little white boy blushed, he forgot everything else. No one had affected him like that before, and he didn’t know what to make of it.

He put the thought out of his mind. Instead, he contemplated Saturday night. It’d be fun to dance, even if it was with dudes, and he’d have a chance to keep an eye on the guys who hit on Jake—make sure they weren’t assholes. Waseem was a big guy who could take care of himself, but for some reason Emmett felt protective about Jake. As good-looking as Jake was, Emmett wouldn’t be surprised if creeps came out of the woodwork trying to get a piece of that.

Jake deserved better. Someone who appreciated him for more than what was on the outside. Emmett’s stomach tied in knots at the thought of watching him with some random stranger, but at least Emmett could keep him safe.

He liked the idea of that.

***

Want more from Jake and Emmett?

Get your copy of Up and Coming, Book 1 in the Coastal College Football series.

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Andrea Dalling lives in the sexy Southeast, where the summers are hot and the romance hotter. She loves to torture her characters but eventually rewards them with a happily-ever-after. Married to her college sweetheart, she is an ally and an advocate for LGBT rights. When she’s not writing, she enjoys gardening at her Raleigh home and scuba diving in the clear blue waters of the Caribbean Sea.

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