Midnight

Jake Uniacke

MIDNIGHT

Copyright © 2018 by Jake Uniacke

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced in any manner without written permission except in the case of brief quotations included in critical articles and reviews. For information, please contact the author.

ISBN-13: 978-1979066716

ISBN-10: 197906671X

All characters appearing in this work are fictitious. Any resemblance to real persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

https://www.facebook.com/juniackeauthor

Books by Jake Uniacke

Life’s a Gamble

The Dog Who Came for Christmas

Chapter 1

The rain hammers against the kitchen window panes as me and my parents sit around the dinner table. “How long until dinner is ready?” asks my dad.

“Not long now,” Mum replies. Dad sighs. It is Saturday evening and dinner still isn’t ready. It’s usually ready around five o’clock but not tonight. And what makes it even worse is that my mum’s favourite show, Strictly Come Dancing, is on soon and she never misses it.

“Well, ‘Strictly’ is on soon so it better be ready within the next ten minutes,” says Dad. “Otherwise you’ll miss it.”

Mum gasps. She had obviously completely forgotten that it was on tonight.

“Oh no!” she cries. She runs over to the oven and sees that the shepherd’s pie is done. “Phew!” she says.

Carefully, Mum takes the pie out of the oven and starts dishing it out onto three plates.

“There,” she says, placing the plates on the table. “Bon appétit!”

We all dig into our dinner and scoff it down as we’re all extremely hungry.

I finish mine pretty quickly so I just sit here sipping from my glass of orange juice as I wait for Mum and Dad to finish.

Mum is the last one eating like always so Dad and I awkwardly sit here watching her eat. “Can you stop watching me?” snaps Mum. “It is quite off-putting!”

Dad and I look away. I don’t think Mum likes living in the house because she is the only woman. Last year, Mum fell pregnant and she was hoping for a girl. But she fell down the stairs and miscarried the baby. It was a very emotional time and Dad blamed himself for it.

That was only because he and Mum got into an argument that night about whether to clear out the box room and make that a nursery or to clean my room to make me and the baby share. Dad didn’t want to rush into anything as Mum was only two months pregnant at the time so he said there was plenty of time. But Mum called him ‘lazy’ and said he didn’t care about the baby.

I knew that wasn’t true. I was holding my head against my bedroom door listening to them arguing.

That’s when I heard my mum scream and a lot of thumping.

That’s when I knew something had happened. “Helen!” cried Dad.

I swung my bedroom door open and was horrified to see my Mum laying at the bottom of the stairs, not moving a muscle.

I couldn’t believe what had happened. Dad called an ambulance and when they arrived, Dad told the paramedic that Mum was pregnant. They rushed her to hospital and did a scan immediately but sadly, they couldn’t find a heartbeat. Mum stayed off work for about a month because she was too upset to go.

I still had to go to school though, even though my emotions were everywhere. I even got bullied for showing my emotions. “Boys don’t cry,” laughed one of the girls. So I turned round and said “Girls don’t bully boys.”

That’s when she shut up. When I got home that night, I confided in Dad because I didn’t want to add any more stress to Mum’s already existing stress. And ever since then, Mum has not been herself.

~

I lay in bed, thinking about the past and what life would be like if all the bad things didn’t happen. If Mum hadn’t had her accident, I would have a little brother or sister right now to play with. But I don’t.

I know Dad wants to try for another baby but he knows Mum won’t want one. Not after what happened last year. He doesn’t talk to Mum much about his emotions because she always mocks him. She doesn’t care about how he feels.

That’s why there is always a lot of tension in the house between them because whenever Dad shows the slightest bit of emotion or wants to talk about them, Mum just says “Oh man up Fred!”

I think that is the most unfair thing she says to Dad. It makes him feel lonely because he has no one to confide in about his emotions. A few months ago, Aunt Jessie passed away due to a heart attack. She was only 43 years old. Dad was extremely upset as she was his sister and he didn’t talk to anyone for days! Whenever he ignored Mum, she just said “Snap out of it Fred! Get some work done!”

She can be quite controlling and demanding.

Dad doesn’t like to get angry at her though because in a previous relationship, he got angry.

He didn’t do anything to hurt his ex-girlfriend. He just shouted at her because she wound him up. She went to the police and he was charged with domestic abuse and had to complete a 3 month anger management course whilst being under police probation.

He was wrongly accused of a crime he didn’t even commit. When the police questioned him, he even said that she got angry at him. But they just shook it off, didn’t care and only cared about the fact that a man had been reported.

Ever since then, Dad has tried to control his anger because he didn’t want to go to prison.

He told me about it when I turned 13 and I was shocked.

I said to him that even if he reported her anger and abuse towards him, the police rarely do anything when men are on the receiving end of abuse from females, in my opinion. That’s when Dad decided he would never go to the police about anything.

Reflecting on the past is quite emotional for me. Especially when I’m thinking about my parents. I fear for my dad. I’ve even told him he should go to the doctor because there’s a chance he could have depression.

He has been feeling down a lot lately and I don’t want him thinking he is alone. I even said he doesn’t have to tell Mum. After all, why should he?

All she’ll say is “Oh you’re just being stupid!”

I stare at a painting on my wall. I painted it when I was six years old at school.

There’s me, Mum, Dad and our dog Rex. I called him Rex after my favourite dinosaur, the Tyrannosaurus Rex. We were doing a project about dinosaurs in Year 1 and I just fell in love with the T-Rex. And when I was given a puppy for my sixth birthday, I decided Rex would be the perfect name for him.

Now though, he is getting quite old. He’s 9. I suppose that isn’t too old but in dog years, that’s quite old. But we all love him. The painting isn’t great but it holds memories for me.

My childhood was brilliant. Every summer, we’d go to the zoo. I would always beg to see the monkeys as they were my favourite zoo animal. In fact, I loved them that much that I even asked for a huge cuddly one for Christmas. And I got it! I’ve still got it in fact.

It sits next to me on my bed and I use it as a pillow some nights if I struggle to sleep. Every night when I was a kid, if I was scared or just couldn’t sleep, I’d always lay on my monkey.

I named him Milo. I’d always beg my parents to let me take him on holiday with us.

And he always found his way into the car even if Mum and Dad said ‘no’. It happened every year and they never noticed he was in the car with me until we got to the campsite. They weren’t happy about it but they laughed it off eventually.

And now there isn’t anything to laugh about. If I do something wrong, Mum would lose her head. If Dad does something wrong, Mum would lose her head. If Mum does something wrong, she’d just blame either me or Dad for it. It isn’t fair. Nothing is fair.

~

It is 22:30.pm. I can hear voices coming from my mum and dad’s room. I can’t quite make out what they’re saying but I hear my name. I slowly get out of bed and creep over to my door. I open it ever so slightly so I can hear what they’re saying.

“I think it’s best if you and Ben move out for a while,” mumbles Mum. “I can’t think with you two around.”

“What do you need to think about?” said Dad.

“I just need to think about life really. The future. How I feel.”

“I get it. I think about my emotions all the time.”

“Stop making this about you. You’re not the one who’s constantly feeling rubbish about yourself. You’re not insecure.”

I shake my head. Is Mum serious? She thinks she is the only insecure person in this house! I can’t believe how selfish she is being. Tomorrow, I am going to give her a piece of my mind!

Chapter 2

I wake up to the sound of thunder. It has obviously been raining all night. However I wasn’t aware we were getting a storm. Sneaky weather. I stretch and as I do, Rex jumps off my bed and shakes. He looks at me, waiting for me to open my bedroom door so he can run down the stairs and go outside for a wee.

I open my door and go downstairs. I let Rex out and when he comes back in, he is dripping wet. I dry him off with his towel and then I make myself some breakfast. It is 8:30.am so Mum and Dad won’t be getting out of bed yet. So I’ve got the TV to myself for a bit.

Rex jumps up onto the sofa and lays down next to me. He is a little cutie when he’s asleep. Mind you, all dachshunds are, aren’t they?

Just as I finish my breakfast, I hear someone coming down the stairs. It’s Dad. “Morning,” he says.

“Morning,” I reply.

I frown as I see Dad is upset. And I know it is because of what Mum said to him last night. I have a feeling that Dad is going to mention it to me at some point this morning because if Mum wants us gone, she’s going to want us gone pronto.

He comes into the living room and sits down on the sofa-chair by the window. “What’s this you’re watching?” he asks.

“Just some rubbish Sunday morning show,” I tell him. “You can change it over if you want.”

I hand the remote to Dad who refuses to take it. “No, no,” he says. “You can keep the program on. It’s not as if we’ll have much longer to watch it.”

I realize that Dad is talking about what was said by Mum last night. But he doesn’t know that I know. So I act oblivious to what he is talking about.

“What do you mean?” I ask. I brace myself for what Dad is about to tell me.

“Your mother thinks it is best that we move out for a bit.” Dad tells me. “She can’t think when we’re here.”

I frown. “Yeah right,” I mumble. “She wants us out because she only cares about how she is feeling and doesn’t give a second thought as to how we may be feeling.”

I don’t even know what Mum has got to be upset about.

Nothing bad has happened to her for ages. Not since last year.

I think back to when Mum lost the baby. It was tough for all of us. Dad couldn’t cope. He’d sit on the sofa all day just thinking about it. It replayed in his head over and over again. But Mum would come in and make him do everything for her as if he was completely fine about what happened.

Maybe these emotions are coming back to Mum and she’s struggling to cope. I don’t want to judge her based on what she is doing and saying but when she is constantly grumpy and selfishly thinking about only her emotions, it is a bit hard not to judge.

“I’m sure in time, she’ll be ready for us to come home,” says Dad, unsure.

“Where are we even going to stay?” I enquire.

“I rang your Uncle Max last night,” Dad informs. “He says we can stay with him for as long as we need.”

I nod. I do like Uncle Max. He’s great fun. The last time I saw him was probably last Christmas. We went round to his on Christmas Eve for dinner and of course, he got drunk. But that was fun because he was doing and saying random things which made me and Dad laugh a lot. But Mum rushed us out of there so I wasn’t ‘influenced’ by his behavior.

“Go pack your things,” says Dad. “You’ll only need your clothes and toiletries and maybe one or two gadgets.”

“What about Milo?” I ask.

Dad looks at me. I can tell he wants to say ‘yes’ but at the same time, he wants to say ‘no’. “Okay,” he says. “You can bring him.”

~

My bag is packed. I have a small suitcase full of my clothes. I’ve folded my duvet up and put my pillow on top. Dad has to borrow one of my old duvets and duvet covers because Uncle Max’s spare room only has two single beds, not a double.

I carry all my things downstairs and I see Mum stood in the living room, crying. “Why are you making us do this?” I ask.

“It isn’t fair. If you need space, why can’t you move out for a bit?”

Mum just stares at me as if she was saying ‘just do as you’re told’.

She doesn’t say a word. I sigh as I put my things on the floor and go upstairs to get my duvet and pillow. Dad is already outside putting his things into the car. Luckily, we have a big car so we have lots of space to put our things. I put Milo on top of my duvet and pillow and then carry all three down the stairs at the same time.

~

Outside, Dad is just putting the last few things in the car before we leave.

Mum watches in sadness. I just wish she would change her mind so we don’t have to leave. But it doesn’t look as though she will change her mind anytime soon.

I go over to give her a hug but she backs away. I’m confused. What’s her problem with me? What’s her problem with Dad? As Dad gets in the car, he looks at Mum and shakes his head, giving her the hint he is not happy with her. But she doesn’t care. When does she ever care?

Dad reverses the car out of the driveway and we speed down the road.

I look back and see Mum close the front door. “Do you think I’ll be able to go see her at some point this week?” I ask.

“You have school,” replies Dad. “And even if you didn’t, she wouldn’t want to see us anyway.”

I sigh. I just don’t understand. There could be many reasons as to why Mum has kicked us out:

She could be ill

She could have cheated on Dad (she cheated with Dad on her previous partner so what’s stopping her?)

She might be giving Dad hints that she wants a divorce

I don’t want to think that any of those are true as I love both my parents and don’t want to choose between them. But I really want to get to the bottom of what is going on.

~

We arrive at Uncle Max’s house and I can see him stood by his window looking out for us.

As Dad and I step out of the car, Uncle Max emerges from his house. “Hello, hello, and hello!” he cheers. He hugs Dad and shakes my hand.

“Need any help getting your things into the house?” asks Uncle Max.

“Yes please,” replies Dad. Uncle Max takes the duvets and carries them through to the house and upstairs. I take my suitcase and Milo out of the car.

“Don’t worry about your mother,” whispers Dad. “We’ll get to the bottom of it.”

I smile as I take my things into the house and up to our new temporary bedroom. “I’ll leave you two to make yourselves at home in here,” says Uncle Max. “I’ll put the kettle on. Do you drink tea or coffee Ben?”

“Erm, no,” I reply. “Do you have orange juice?”

“Yes. Would you like a small glass of that?”

“Yes please.”

Uncle Max smiles and leaves the room.

I look at Dad for a brief moment and smile. “Shall we start making our beds?” asks Dad. “That should be done first I reckon.”

I nod. “Yeah that’s okay,” I say.

Dad looks at his bed and spots the dirty sheet. “Really?” he says. “I’ll have to ask Max for a clean one.”

He leaves the room, leaving me alone to make my own bed. Luckily, my sheet is clean so I don’t have to worry about asking Uncle Max for a clean one. I throw my pillow onto the bed and unfold my duvet, spreading it across the bed. Dad comes back with Uncle Max. “Sorry about that,” says Uncle Max. “I didn’t realize it was dirty.”

He takes the sheet off of the bed and puts the clean one on.

Then he leaves Dad and me alone again to carry on making ourselves feel at home.

“I really don’t like having to share such a small room,” I say. The only reason why I say this is because the room is about as big as my bedroom at home but it seems smaller here as there are two beds rather than one.

“Well hopefully it will only be for a few days,” says Dad. “Then we might be able to go back home.”

I nod unconvincingly. Dad seems to believe that we’ll be able to go back home in no time but I don’t believe we will.

Mum is very stubborn and it’ll take her a long time to allow us back in the house. One of my other worries about staying with Uncle Max is that it is now an extra ten minute walk to school.

My school is literally just around the corner from my house. So the fact we’ve had to move further away means that I will have to leave Uncle Max’s house earlier so that I can get to school on time.

I’m extremely disappointed in Mum. Why does she have to do this? Why does she have to be so awkward about everything that happens?

Chapter 3

It is the evening now. We’ve just finished our dinner which was kindly cooked by Uncle Max. It wasn’t the best meal I’ve ever had but it was still nice. “What did you think?” asks Uncle Max. Dad stares at him. “Do you want my honest opinion or do you want me to lie?” says Dad.

“Honest opinion,” says Uncle Max. “Mum always taught us to tell the truth.”

“Yeah when we were ten! Anyway, I didn’t really like it to be honest. But it was okay. Six out of ten.”

Uncle Max smiles. I sit here quietly as I feel awkward. I mean, who can honestly sit down and have a meal with someone they haven’t seen properly in almost a year and play happy families? I certainly can’t. But for some very odd reason, Dad can.

 But maybe that’s because Uncle Max is his brother. I don’t know. All I know is, is that I feel awkward having dinner at Uncle Max’s. I want to be at home with my mum. Not sitting around a table fit for two people having disgusting meals and having stupid conversations. And Uncle Max isn’t the best influence either. He’s a very childish adult; and he’s meant to be 35 years old!

Dad and Uncle Max start having a conversation about work so I excuse myself to go to the bathroom. I need a break from them and I figure a bath is the best therapy to get over the fact that I’ll be living here for a while. In the bath, I can relax. I have my own space where I can just think about things.

And in this bath, I just want to think how different life would be if Mum or Dad wasn’t around. Because I know for a fact that if Mum and Dad ever split up, Mum would be so stubborn and make me stay with her whether I choose to or not.

~

The water in the bath rises as the tap pours it in. Bubbles huddle together as the water fills the tub. “Do you need a towel?” asks Uncle Max.

That was a bit of a stupid question. So I decide to give a sarcastic answer.

“No it’s okay,” I say. “I thought I’d dry myself on the carpet.”

Uncle Max giggles. “Still got your cheekiness then?” he laughs. “I’ll get you a towel from the airing cupboard.”

I smile. He returns with a towel just before I get in the bath. “Thanks,” I say. I close the bathroom door and lock it, placing the towel on the hook on the back of the door.

Laying in the bath, I just think. I think about Mum. I just wish that she didn’t have her attitude. The fact she has caused all this just by not caring about anyone else baffles me. I want her and Dad to make up. Even if Dad has to be the one to apologize (which he shouldn’t because it isn’t his fault) then that would make me feel better. If it means we can all be together again, then that’s what may have to happen.

~

It is my first night at Uncle Max’s and it is awkward sharing a room with my dad. He fell asleep almost instantly and he is snoring! And it is seriously doing my head-in! I just sit on my phone texting my friend, Kai.

I haven’t seen a lot of him recently because he’s been busy with his family, which is understandable.

So texting him is the only way I can be social with him these days.

He doesn’t know about what’s been going on and I don’t plan on telling him either because I don’t want a fuss and obviously if we end up going back home soon, telling people about it would just seem as though I’m looking for sympathy – which I am not!

I end the conversation by telling him I’m going to sleep.

It takes me a while but eventually, I do nod off – even if Dad’s snoring keeps me awake most of the night.

~

The morning comes around pretty quickly and it is the first day which I will have to leave earlier for school. I ask Dad if I can have the day off today just so that I can settle into Uncle Max’s but he says no and I have to go to school. I really don’t want to go in today, mainly because it is assembly day for Year 10 and I absolutely hate assemblies.

Also, adding on the fact that the end of term is in a few weeks before the summer holidays, this could be the last one before we have the awards assembly. The dreaded awards assembly.

No one likes the awards assembly because it is embarrassing having to walk up in front of everyone with them all looking at you as if you’re some kind of teacher’s pet.

I’m not one of them of course. But the biggest teacher’s pet in the school is Kimberly Taylor. She would do anything to get into the teachers’ good books and every awards assembly we have, she always gets at least one. I don’t remember the last time she didn’t.

I get my school uniform on and pack my bag. There isn’t a lot of food for me to take to school so I raid Uncle Max’s kitchen to find something I like. I also ask Dad for a little bit of money so I can buy something from the school.

Mum usually packs my lunch the night before so that I know it is done but here it is different. Dad said that I have to pack my own lunch otherwise I’ll go hungry because he nor Uncle Max is doing it for me.

From Uncle Max’s kitchen, I managed to find a bag of Quavers and a chocolate biscuit bar. Dad gives me £2 to get a drink and a sandwich from school. I’m kind of gutted I have to buy a drink from school because they don’t sell fizzy drinks. In fact, they’re banned! But I always manage to sneak in a bottle of lemonade when I can. I just say it’s sparkling water. They never know!

~

By the time I arrive at school, I’m exhausted. The long walk really hurt my legs and has given me a stitch.

I see Kai stood by the bike sheds, locking his bike up. “Kai!” I shout. He looks over and waves.

I walk over to him and see he’s struggling to lock his bike. “Need a hand?” I offer.

“Yes please,” he says.

I take the lock from him and loop it through his wheel. His mother has always told him to lock his bike with two locks – one for the frame and one for the front wheel.

She has always been overprotective of him.

“So how are you?” he asks, trying to making conversation.

“I’m not too bad. You?” I reply.

“I’m okay.”

Locking the bike up through the wheel is difficult. Kai always struggles with it but manages to do it eventually. But for some reason today, it just won’t lock.

I take the lock out of the wheel and have a look at it.

“It’s busted,” I say. “Something inside has broken and is stopping the lock going in.”

“Oh no!” cries Kai. “Mum’s gonna kill me!”

Kai worries a lot. In fact, he worries more than he should. “You’ll just have to get a new one after school,” I say. “I’m sure one day without this lock won’t do any harm. After all, you’ve already got a lock around your frame.”

“I suppose.”

Kai takes the lock from me and chucks it in the bin.

~

It is lunch time. And Kai being the worry-machine he is, goes to check his bike. I’m shocked. He’s shocked. “Oh no!” he cries. “Oh God, please no!”

His bike isn’t where he locked it up. “This can’t be happening,” shouts Kai. “My mum is gonna kill me!”

“Kai I’m…” I say before being interrupted.

“This is your fault! If you had managed to lock my wheel, my bike would still be here!”

He’s furious. He isn’t the kind of person to erupt like that. And right now, he’s like a volcano erupting to let all his anger out.

“Kai!” I shout. “The lock was broken!”

He doesn’t want to hear what I’ve got to say and runs into the school, my guess to see the headmaster, Mr Williams. They both come out about five minutes later and I stand there while Mr Williams stares at me as if I’ve done something wrong – which I haven’t.

“What happened?” says Mr Williams, eventually. He looks at me, his eyes begging me for an answer.

“His bike got nicked,” I say, bluntly.

“Don’t be cheeky. Tell me what happened.”

I look at him for a moment wondering what he is talking about. What does he mean ‘cheeky’? “I just told you what happened you stupid old man!” I shout. “What more do you want?”

Mr Williams is the most annoying human being ever. He asks for the truth and when he gets it, he doesn’t seem to accept it. I kind of feel bad for snapping at him like that. But he is winding me up, as always. “Detention!” he shouts. “You will go to the detention room tonight at half past three. Miss Everton is in charge tonight.”

My eyes bulge out of my face. Not Miss Everton! Please not Miss Everton! She is the worst teacher in the school. She hates everything and everyone. All we have to do is breathe and she’ll start shouting. In year nine, she was my English teacher and she wanted single tables in the classroom so we couldn’t sit next to anyone. The only time we were allowed to talk was if we were answering questions, discussing texts as a class or doing group work. At any other time, we had to be sat in silence and if we so much as breathed, she would give us an hour detention.

I’m usually one of the good kids though so the fact I’m in detention for no reason will shock her and I do not want to guess what she’ll say to me. Kai looks at me and then looks at Mr Williams.

By the look of it, even he is shocked by my unnecessary detention.

“Sir,” he says. “He doesn’t deserve a detention. He didn’t do anything wrong.”

“You said he caused your bike to get stolen and then he called me a ‘stupid old man’! Of course he deserves a detention!” cries Mr Williams.

“I was wrong. It wasn’t his fault. I was just angry that my bike was stolen that’s all. Don’t give him a detention for that.”

Mr Williams thinks for a moment. “Fine,” he says. “You are off detention for the bike theft. However you must serve half the detention time for insulting me. Half an hour with Miss Everton after school.”

He walks off and leaves me and Kai to make things right. “I am sorry,” says Kai. “I didn’t mean to shout at you earlier.”

“It’s fine,” I reply. “You were angry. I get it. Friends?”

“Friends.”

Kai and I shake hands and go inside to get some food. Mr Williams had wasted our time so we didn’t have much longer to eat.

The cafeteria is busy so we have to push past people to get to the queue.  “I hate Mr Williams,” I mumble. “He’s such a pain in the…”

“A pain in the what?” a voice interrupts. I turn around and see Mr Williams lurking over me. “Oh hi Sir,” I say. I force a smile on to try and get his attention away from the fact I was about to insult him…again.

“Detention,” he says. “For an hour!”

Chapter 4

I sit bored in the detention hall. Miss Everton walks up and down making sure everyone is behaving. We’re not allowed to do anything. We have to just sit here, bored out of our minds. And I’ve got to be sat like this for an hour!

~

Dad and Uncle Max are surprised when I arrive home late. I don’t want them to know I had a detention so I lie and just say I went to an after-school club. “What club?” asks Dad. I have to think of something quick so I say “Tennis club!”

“Tennis club?” questions Dad. “Since when did you enjoy playing tennis?”

“Since I saw Andy Murray win Wimbledon,” I lie. “Inspiring!”

Uncle Max giggles. “We know you had detention,” he laughs. “But good on ya for standing up to your headmaster!”

I look at Dad and see he’s laughing too.

“Mr Williams was my headmaster. He’s a right pain in the…” says Uncle Max.

“What’s for dinner?” I interrupt quickly.

“Stir-fry,” says Dad. “I’m cooking tonight.”

I smile when Dad says this. He can cook a great stir-fry and whenever Mum tries it, it either goes horribly wrong or it doesn’t taste very nice. Therefore, Dad’s is much better. And I also didn’t want another meal from Uncle Max. Not after last nights.

“I’ll just go and get changed,” I say. I go upstairs and decide to put my pajamas on. What’s the point of putting clean clothes on when in a few hours I’ll be going to bed anyway?

~

“Ben!” shouts Dad. “Dinner’s ready!”

I run downstairs and sit down at the dinner table. There are three glasses on the table at each place with a jug of orange juice in the middle. I like how Uncle Max always organizes the table so no one gets in the way of Dad cooking.

Dad hates it when people get in his way. At home when he’s cooking, if me or Mum even so much as step foot in the kitchen, he’ll moan at us and tell us to get out.

We sit down and have dinner. “Can I go back home tomorrow after school?” I ask. “I want to bring Rex here.”

Dad and Uncle Max look at each other as if there is something I should be aware of. “Ben,” says Uncle Max. “I don’t want your dog here. When I was twenty-one, I was attacked by a Rottweiler and it has traumatized me ever since.”

“But Rex is a softy,” I say. “He wouldn’t hurt anyone.”

“I’m sorry Ben.”

I sigh. I suppose I could go home anyway just to see him, even if Mum doesn’t want me there. I’ll be there for Rex, not for Mum. There. My mind is made up.

I’m going home tomorrow to see Rex and to make sure Mum is looking after him properly.

I mean, I’m sure she is looking after him properly. But with her mood lately, I don’t know if she would have taken him out for proper walks or just let him do his business in the garden.

And if that was the case, Dad would not be happy. He doesn’t like it when Rex does his business in the garden because he should be doing it in the fields we take him to on walks.

The only exception is if he is ill and needs to go into the garden. That’s when Dad is okay with it. Any other instance, he hates it.

“We’re going out for dinner on Wednesday,” says Dad.

“What’s the occasion?” I ask. The only time we ever go out for dinner is if it is an occasion such as Christmas Eve, a birthday or an anniversary. “It’s Uncle Max’s treat,” says Dad. “He usually goes out for lunch every Wednesday with his lady-friend. But she’s ill so he’s booked us for dinner instead.”

“Oh okay,” I reply. “Thanks Uncle Max.”

“That’s alright, pal,” replies Uncle Max.

We finish dinner and I go back through to the living room. I really want to watch TV as my favourite program is on tonight but I know that Uncle Max and Dad like watching TV together every night. Sometimes I sit and watch it with them depending on what it is they’re watching but otherwise, I just go and lay down in the bedroom.

“Uncle Max,” I call. “Is it alright for me to watch my favourite program tonight?”

I feel like it is polite to ask before I just jump in and turn it on. “What time is it on?” asks Uncle Max.

“Half past six,” I inform him. “It’s an hour.”

“Course you can.”

I smile. “Thank you.”

~

My second night at Uncle Max’s is much better than my first night here. We played Monopoly for a while before I decided to head up to bed. Dad is still downstairs with Uncle Max. I can hear music quietly playing so I think they might be having a few beers or something.

I don’t know though. Kai texts me and I open the message to see what he wants.

I’m so sorry about today. I’ll make it up to you this weekend. How about McDonalds?

I think for a moment. I’ve already forgiven him so why is he apologizing – again? It’s all a bit ridiculous if you ask me. But I’m not going to turn down a free McDonalds.

Yeah, sounds good. See you at school tomorrow.

I reply.

Dad comes up and sees me on my phone. “You should be asleep,” he says. “You’ve got school tomorrow.”

“I know,” I reply. “But I’m texting Kai.”

Strictly speaking, I’m not texting him really as I only replied to one text and don’t plan on replying to anymore tonight. But I decide to just sit on my phone and read through Twitter.

“Right well don’t spend too long on your phone,” Dad tells me. “I want you feeling refreshed for school.”

I nod in agreement. “Yes Dad,” I say.

He turns on his bedside lamp and rummages through his draws to find his pajamas and toothbrush. Then he leaves the room again and I hear the bathroom door shut.

Tomorrow, I’ll be late back from school again because I’m going back home to see Rex – and to get through to Mum. I hope it goes better than what I think it will. Because I do not want my dad saying “I told you so.”

Chapter 5

Mr Williams watches me as I walk into school. There still hasn’t been any news about Kai’s bike and I think Mr Williams still believes I caused it.

I sit down next to Kai in science and ask him about his bike. “The police have added it to the stolen bikes list,” says Kai.

“Along with the other thousands of bikes!” I tell him. “The police don’t do their job properly when it comes to theft. They’re more worried about arresting people who go two miles over the speed limit.”

Kai giggles. “Yeah I suppose that’s true.”

My teacher comes in and demands everyone to be quiet.

“Now,” she says. “I have an important meeting today so you’ll have Miss Everton.”

The whole class groans. “Quiet!” yells Mrs. Ward.

She waits for Miss Everton to come before she leaves. When Miss Everton arrives, one boy in my class, Tyler, hits her with a question which makes all of us wonder why she’s actually here. “Miss, you don’t even know anything about science!” calls out Tyler. “You teach English!”

Miss Everton looks at him. “You’ll be working from textbooks. I’m just here to supervise you. Now you’ll be working on pages five and six, you’ll answer all the questions and you will not talk to anyone.”

We all groan – again.

~

It’s 15:30. I leave school and walk straight back home. Mum made us leave our keys behind so we couldn’t just walk back in so I had to knock on the door. And when she answers, she doesn’t look very pleased to see me. “What’re you doing here?” she asks.

“I’ve come to see Rex,” I say. “And to see how you are.”

“I’m fine. Rex is asleep on your bed.”

She doesn’t make any eye contact whilst speaking to me. I don’t get what her problem is.

I run upstairs and into my room where I see Rex fast asleep. He looks so cute and peaceful and I don’t want to disturb him but I haven’t seen him in a few days.

And I know he will be excited to see me. “Rex,” I say. “Rex.”

His ears perk and when he sees me, he enthusiastically wags his tail and starts whining. “Hello boy!” I say. “Yes hello.”

He jumps up wanting a cuddle so I pick him up and hold him close to my chest. I take him downstairs where I can talk to Mum as well as be with Rex. “Have you been feeding him?” I ask.

“Yes,” says Mum, not making any eye contact.

“Have you been taking him out for walks at least twice a day?”

“Yes!”

“What about…”

“I have done everything you’d normally do Ben! Now shut up about your flaming dog!”

I stare at Mum. How dare she speak to me like that! Dad was right. She is a very angry person. “What’s your problem?” I ask.

Mum stares at me before answering.

“You and your father constantly at me!” she says. “Whenever I’m feeling down, you never check up on me. I don’t feel respected. I don’t feel wanted. I feel alone!”

I’m shocked. How can she feel like that? She makes Dad feel like that! “Excuse me?” I say. “Whenever Dad is upset, you just tell him to ‘man up’ and ‘get on with it’. You never comfort him. You don’t respect him. Whenever you get angry, you hit him. You know what you are? A man beater!”

I’m surprised by my outburst but I had to say it. She doesn’t give a second thought for anyone else. But Mum just laughs. “Ha, ha!” she laughs. “What are you chatting about?”

Right now, I am very angry with Mum. Even when the truth smacks her in the face, she still acts the same.

“You know what Mum?” I say. “I don’t have to listen to this. Come on Rex.”

I get Rex’s lead from the coat hooks in the hallway and attach it to his collar. “I hope you’re happy,” I slyly say before leaving.

~

The sun starts to go down but I don’t want to go back to Uncle Max’s. I’ve been out here for about two hours now and I haven’t had a text from Dad so I reckon he thinks I’m still at the house. But I’m not. I’m actually on my way to the beach.

For the past two hours, I’ve been walking through parks and fields with Rex, giving him a long walk.

The beach is the place I sometimes go when I’m stressed or angry. I just sit on a bench and think. So that’s what I’m going to do now.

There aren’t that many people around except for one or two dog walkers (not including me). I find a bench and sit down and Rex jumps up next to me. I just stare into the distance, watching the waves gently move in the wind.

It is getting dark but I still don’t go back to Uncle Max’s. I begin to tell myself that I need to take Rex back home because he can’t stay here with me all night. But I want to be with him – he’s my comfort rock.

Sitting down is making me numb so I stand up and walk up the pathway towards the lake at the back of the beach. The lake is where lots of people go when they want peace. It is a very peaceful area and even I sometimes come here when I need peace and quiet; and today is no different.

Rex looks up at me looking hungry. There are no shops around the beach so I finally decide to take him back home.

~

“Rex needs his dinner,” I say.

“Okay, I’ll give it to him in a minute,” Mum replies.

I give Mum the lead and then leave the house. I’m not sticking around for another argument.

I stop at the end of the driveway and think. Do I go back to Uncle Max’s? Or do I go back to the beach for some alone time?

Mum has pretty much wound me up and I still think I need some time alone.

So that’s what I do. I start walking back in the direction of the beach.

I arrive a lot quicker than before – mainly because I had Rex with me before and he kept stopping for a wee every few minutes.

It is extremely dark now and I am starting to feel scared. But I just don’t want to go back to the warmth of the house. I’m starting to think I’ll be out here all night with the way things are going for me at the moment.

~

No one is around now except for the maintenance team locking up the beach toilets for the night. I just sit on a bench again and lay down. This is where I’ll sleep tonight. I’m not going back to Uncle Max’s and that’s that. Which means I won’t be going to school tomorrow either.

Luckily I still have my uniform on and I have my bag so I can easily pretend I’ve been to school – but I’ll have to ring the school pretending to be my dad to say that I’m ill.

I close my eyes but I just can’t sleep. It’s too cold. I sit up and look around me to see if there’s anywhere warmer – or at least some shelter where I can sleep tonight.

But there’s nowhere. This bench will be my bed and I’ll just have to get used to it.

The sound of the waves make me tired but not enough to sleep.

I am concerned that Dad hasn’t text me yet. If I’m not home, he usually texts me to see where I am or to check I’m safe. Maybe he’s just assuming I’m staying at home tonight and Mum has finally come round.

Obviously that isn’t the case. But I wish it was. That way I wouldn’t be sleeping out here tonight.

Chapter 6

I wake up to the sound of a car horn. I’m not exactly sure what time it is but it certainly isn’t morning as it is still dark. I get my phone out and see that it is only 23:57pm. I’ve only slept for about 45 minutes. I sit up and breathe in the fresh, night beach air. It is calming.

Standing up, I stretch and walk over to the seafront. The sound of pebbles crunching underneath me sounds nicer at night for some reason. I’m worried that I’m going to get attacked by a wild animal or a lone walker. But I doubt that will actually happen.

I just walk straight up the seafront, kicking pebbles and throwing them into the water, some skimming, some splashing. It is extremely cold and I am extremely hungry and thirsty. But I just have to push through it as I’m not going to be able to have any food and drink for another day.

If I had money, I’d be able to buy some tomorrow. But I don’t.

I keep walking up the seafront, still kicking pebbles as I go.

Something glimmers in the distance. I’m not sure what it is but it is very bright. A bright blue colour. I jog up to it and bend down to pick it up. It’s a stone. Someone must have dropped it and not realized. Or it has fallen off some jewelry. I stare into it. For some reason, it hurts and I feel a sharp, stabbing pain travel through my body.

I ignore it though. It must just be because I’m hungry. The stone is beautiful though and I couldn’t think of a reason why anyone wouldn’t want it. I look around me to make sure no one is around and then I stick it in my pocket.

Realizing that I can’t really do anything else anymore, I go back to the bench I’m using as my bed for the night. I check my phone again. The battery is low and there is no where for me to charge it. And even if there was, it wouldn’t be any use as I don’t have my charger. Ugh why don’t I ever think of these things? Oh yeah I forgot. I don’t often fantasize about sleeping at the beach all night.

I lay back down and close my eyes hoping I’ll drift off quite quickly. But it doesn’t help. Seagulls fly over me, squawking as they fly by.

They go off into the distance but it stops me from falling asleep as their squawking scared the life out of me.

~

Morning comes around quickly.

I must have gotten at least five hours sleep in total but I suppose that is better than nothing.

I sit up and stretch whilst yawning. I rub my eyes and look behind me. Mr Williams is in the distance walking towards the beach car park. Scared he will see me, I crawl under the bench and wait until I think he has gone.

He lives close by to the beach so I assume he uses the beach car park to park his car at night if he doesn’t have a driveway. I get out from under the bench and stand up.

I figure that I need to ring the school to pretend to be ill. Luckily I turned my phone off last night so I should have at least 10% battery left which should be enough to make a quick phone call.

“Hello,” I say. “My son Ben Harding will not be attending school today as he is ill. His tutor is Miss Platt”

I end the call quickly. I feel bad for not texting Dad to tell him I’m safe last night. Even though really, I wasn’t. I was in all kinds of danger last night but Mum and Dad don’t need to know that.

The maintenance team open the beach toilets again so I run over so I can use the toilet and wash my face.

I splash water onto my face with my hands so I feel a bit fresher than what I did all night.

Someone walks in and looks at me funnily. “What?” I snap.

“Are you homeless?” asks the man.

“No.”

He looks at me like I’m in denial. “It’s okay to ask for help,” he says. “Now, can I get you anything to eat or drink?”

I think for a moment. If I pretend to be homeless for now, I can get free food. “Yes please,” I say. I try my best to act and stay in character. My main worry is seeing someone I know and them seeing me.

The man, who I learned was called George, takes me to the café across the road. “What can I get you?” he asks.

“Full English please,” I say. “And an orange juice.”

George goes to the counter and gets the food. “I’ve got to go to work but will you be okay here?” he says.

“Yes I’ll be fine,” I tell him. “You go to work.”

He smiles before leaving. Wow.

I’m surprised by what he did because I see real homeless people on the streets not getting any help whatsoever. I do want to do by bit to help but Mum and Dad always say no.

The waitress comes over with my breakfast.

“Thank you,” I say. I squirt a blob of ketchup onto the plate and start to tuck into it.

~

I was in the café for about two hours before I left. It didn’t take me two hours to eat my breakfast of course. I was in there so I could charge my phone (I asked the waitress if she had one I could borrow for a bit). So I have power again!

Still haven’t had any texts from Dad so he must assume I got off to school safely and stayed at home overnight.

But surely any parent would contact you just to make sure you’re okay? There isn’t much I can do today as I’m supposed to be in school but I’m not. I want to go back home.

Actually, I can. Mum will be at work all day meaning Rex will be home alone – the perfect chance to see him!

I gather my things and start to walk back towards my road. I stare at my house thinking about everything that had happened here over the years.

I wish everything could go back to normal. Mum made Dad and I leave our keys behind when she kicked us out so I can’t get in the front door. I walk around to the back to see if I’m able to get in through the back door. Sure enough, it is unlocked. Rex runs over to me and jumps up. “Hey Rex,” I say, giving him attention. “Hey boy!”

I pick him up to give him a cuddle.

He does like cuddles from me. I put him down and go over to the fridge to make myself some lunch for later. Considering Mum doesn’t drive, she has managed to buy a lot of stock for the kitchen. Usually, Dad takes her shopping because he’s the only one who drives.

I make myself a corned beef and cheese sandwich with pickle to top it off.

 I spread the dressing over the other slice of bread and place it down onto the cheese and corned beef covered slice of bread. I cut it into triangles – the way I always had my sandwiches cut when was little – and wrap it in tinfoil so it doesn’t go stale.

“Rex!” I call. Rex comes running through to the kitchen and I give him a slice of cheese that I didn’t put into my sandwich. He scoffs it down and then looks at me for more. “No more bud,” I say. “Let’s go and watch TV.”

I walk through to the living room and sit down on the sofa, where Rex joins me as he snuggles into me. I switch the TV on and sit silently whilst watching the program I put on.

~

I hear the front door click. I quickly sit up and turn around. Mum’s home.

“What are you doing here?!” she screams. “You’re meant to be at your Uncle Max’s!”

“I wanted to see Rex,” I say. “He’s my dog and this is my home.”

She looks at me. “How did you get in?” she asks.

“Through the back door,” I tell her. “You’re lucky it was me who came in. Leaving the back door unlocked like that could let anyone in!”

She sarcastically smiles. I’m hoping this could be the moment she asks me and Dad to come home again. “How is it there?” asks Mum.

“Where?” I say.

“At your Uncle Max’s!”

“Oh. Yeah it’s alright. But I prefer here.”

Mum nods and doesn’t say anything afterwards. “Maybe you could stay here tonight,” she suddenly pipes up.

“Really?” I ask.

“Yes.”

“Great! I’ll tell Dad to bring some of our things over!”

“Not your father too. Just you.”

I frown. Why does she have to do this? It’s destroying this family. Okay, that was a bit dramatic but she’s making things awkward for the family, that’s for sure.

Chapter 7

Mum said I can stay at home tonight so I won’t be coming back to Uncle Max’s until tomorrow. Enjoy your lad’s night in ??.

I send the text to Dad and put my phone down. Mum makes my bed up again for me to sleep in tonight and I get my pajamas out of my drawer. I dig around in my school trousers pockets and pull out the blue stone I found last night. I stare at it for a moment. The same strange feeling that I felt last night when I picked it up flows through me again.

It is a sharp, stabbing pain and spreads through my whole body. My organs start feeling weird. This is extremely strange. But like last night, I just ignore it. It’s probably just growing pains. I put the stone on my bedside table.

“Ben!” shouts Mum. “I’ve made dinner!”

I run downstairs, pain still digging into me. “What is it?” I ask.

“Spaghetti bolognaise,” says Mum.

I sit down at the dinner table and wait for Mum to bring the bowls of spag-bol over.

She places one of the bowls in front of me and I immediately dig in. “No garlic bread?” I say.

“No, there wasn’t any in the freezer,” says Mum. “But maybe if your father and I get through this situation and move on, I’ll buy some next time.”

This is my chance to ask Mum about this ‘situation’. “So what situation is this, then?” I ask. “I mean, you’ve been acting weird for weeks!”

Mum stops eating and sighs. “It’s just…” she begins. “It’s just that I’ve been thinking…”

“About?”

“Stuff.”

When Mum says she’s been thinking about ‘stuff’, it usually isn’t good. And I don’t think it’s any better this time either.

“What ‘stuff’?” I ask. I want to know exactly what it is so I can decide whether it is just petty reasons or if it is actually a legitimate reason.

“I’ve been looking at some old photos of when I was young,” she says. “And I’ve been thinking about my childhood.”

I’m still completely confused. What was so bad about her childhood? I’ve never heard any stories about it before! “What about your childhood?” I ask, still wanting answers.

“When I was three, my father left home. My mum had an affair with her boss,” explains Mum. “But then her boss suddenly died after being hit by a car.”

I stare at Mum, seeing the emotion spill out of her. “That’s when she started getting violent. Until I was fifteen, my mum would abuse me. Social services found out after the school found out and I was taken into care.”

I didn’t realize that Mum’s childhood was so rough. I knew that she had a violent past because of her previous relationships but I didn’t think that it was because of her own mum! I kind of feel sorry for her. But this conversation gives me a thought.

“Maybe you could talk to Dad about this,” I suggest. “It might make him understand better as to why you’re like you are sometimes.”

Mum stares at me. I had obviously just said something wrong. “Like I am sometimes? What the hell is that meant to mean?” she snaps.

“I just mean that sometimes you can get angry,” I say. “You blame Dad for things that aren’t his fault. You snap at him!”

Mum sighs. I don’t know whether it is the ‘I’m getting bored of this now so shut up’ sigh or the ‘you know what, you’re right’ sigh. “Come on,” says Mum. “Finish your dinner then we can have dessert.”

I hurriedly finish my dinner and take the empty bowl over to the kitchen sink where I wash it. Mum takes ice cream out of the freezer and rests it on the side to defrost.

“So how’s school going?” asks Mum. “I haven’t had any updates since…well, you know.”

I nod. “Yeah, it’s going great,” I say. “Apart from the fact that Kai’s bike got stolen the other day and I got the blame!”

“How could you possibly steal a bike?” shrieks Mum. “Where you gonna hide it? In your bag?”

“I know. It’s ridiculous.”

“Who blamed you?”

“Mr Williams.”

Mum scowls. She has always hated Mr Williams, ever since he banned her from school trips for having a go at Tia, a girl in my class who thinks she owns the place.

“Maybe I should have a word,” says Mum.

“No need,” I inform her. “It is sorted now.”

“Really? Okay.”

Mum stands up and makes two bowls of ice cream.

~

It is night time now. I glance over at the blue stone next to my bed. It still baffles me that every time I touch the stone, it makes me feel so painful.

So I decide not to touch it for a little while, just until the pain goes away. My bedroom door opens and Mum comes in. “Night, night,” she says. “Don’t stay up too late. You’ve got school tomorrow.”

I nod. “Don’t worry,” I tell her. “I won’t be up for much longer. I’m tired anyway.”

Mum smiles and closes the door. I quickly flick through my social media before turning my phone off for the night. Rex is laying at the end of my bed as usual, snoring away. But I don’t moan. I smile. I haven’t heard his snoring for the past couple of nights and in all honesty, I’ve missed it. It isn’t as loud as Dad’s either which makes it even better.

I close my eyes, in the hope that I will fall asleep quickly. But it doesn’t happen. I’m in too much pain.

I groan, which wakes Rex up. He comes over and sniffs me before licking my face. He can obviously sense that I’m in pain and he wants to make me feel better – by licking my face!

~

I wake up with a jump. Pain shoots through my body. I try to lift myself up to go downstairs to get a glass of water. But I can’t.

I’m literally glued to my bed. I glance over at the stone and it is glowing. The glow fades in and out, in and out, in and out, and it confuses me. I have never seen it do anything like that before.

Suddenly, the stone explodes with blue smoke which fills my room. Rex starts barking but the blue smoke blocks out all sound. What is happening?!

My door has gone. Disappeared. Poof! Instead, a portal-like door has taken its place. Blue shines out of it. Slowly, I walk over to it and take a quick look inside. But just as I’m about to step away, the portal sucks me in.

“Argh!” I scream.

Chapter 8

Bright lights surround me. I cannot figure out where I am. My eyes are still closed but I can tell that lights are all around me as the power of them go straight through my eyelids. “It’s a boy!” I hear someone say. It takes me a while to work out where I am but eventually, I realize. It’s my birth! The day I was born! My eyes open and I’m immediately met by a male face hovering over me. He has a face mask on and a hat. Suddenly, he carries me and places me into the arms of another. This person is female. It’s my mum. My dad is stood next to her, holding her hand. They both look completely different. Dad has a moustache. Mum has blonde hair. Not like now. Dad doesn’t have his moustache anymore and Mum’s hair is brown! I start crying. I don’t even know why.

Maybe it’s because I’ve been brought into this world where I don’t want to be right now.

Mum starts rubbing my head to calm me down. But I carry on crying. It’s almost like I enjoy it.

Mum tenderly puts her lips on my forehead and kisses me.

This calms me down. All I needed was a bit of love and care. And I know I’ll get this as I grow up. Mum looks into my eyes and begins to cry silently. I’m unsure of what this means. Is she upset because I’ve arrived? Is she upset because I’m not a girl? Or is it happy tears? Dad kisses her forehead and looks at me, smiling. “We are going to love you lots,” whispers Mum. “Don’t ever think we don’t love you.”

I grab one of her massive fingers with my tiny hand and hold it. It gives me a slight sense of security and safety. That’s all I need. To be safe.

I’m on the move again. This time, I’m placed into the arms of my father. He holds me tight, showing me the love I want from both my parents. “Welcome to the world, Son,” says Dad. Usually when Dad says something nice and comforting like that, I smile. But since I’m just a baby right now, I don’t understand a word he says. The same goes for Mum.

“What are we going to call him?” whispers Mum. “We need a name soon!”

Dad thinks for a moment. “Sebastian?” he suggests.

“We don’t live in flaming Downton Abbey! I’d rather not give him a posh boy name.”

“I can’t think of any other names then.”

“Maybe we could name him after your late grandfather, Benjamin,” suggests Mum. “I know how much you miss him.”

Dad smiles and looks at me. “He does look like a Benjamin.”

Mum smiles back. “Benjamin it is then,” she announces. The doctors come back over and talk to Mum and Dad.

But suddenly, everything becomes a blur. I struggle for breath. Dad notices I am struggling to breathe. “Help!” screams Dad. “He’s choking!”

Mum looks over in shock. “No!” she cries. “My baby! Help him please! Please help him!”

The doctors rush over and take me from Dad. I don’t like being passed around like a doll. But I know the doctors are trying to help me. They place some sort of plastic mask over my face and they connect me up to some machine as if I am some kind of robot.

Then, one doctor starts rubbing my chest and sticks a tube down my throat.

Whatever he is doing seems to get me breathing again.

Mum and Dad stare over, hoping that whatever is wrong with me will be fixed soon.

~

I’m back in Mum’s arms now. “He stopped breathing due to being in a new environment,” explains the doctor.

“As he tried to breathe on his own, he choked on his own breath because he isn’t used to having to catch breath by himself. It often happens.”

Dad shakes the doctor’s hand. “Thank you doctor,” he says. “When will we be able to take him home?”

The doctor looks at them both for a moment. “We’d like to keep him in overnight just for observations,” says the doctor. “You’re more than welcome to use the relative’s rest room for the night to stay here.”

Dad nods. “Yes please,” he says. “Will my wife be staying here for the night?”

“Yes. We’d like to keep your wife here just to make sure she’s safe too.”

Mum nods. She looks down at me and smiles. “You be a good boy for the nice doctors and nurses,” she tells me.

I feel myself being lifted again and once again, I’m in the arms of the doctor.

Seriously, who am I going home with? My parents or the doctors? I seem to be spending more time with the doctors than my parents!

I’m placed into a plastic bed. I don’t know what it is but it isn’t the most comfortable thing in the world.

I preferred it in my mum’s arms. They’re much comfier than this plastic box.

~

I’m in a well-lit room occupied by other plastic boxes.

Each one contains a baby. What is this? Is this some child torture center? It certainly feels like one. Why do we babies get put into plastic box-beds but the adults don’t?

I stretch my arms and kick my legs about. There are tubes all over me. What are they doing to me? Are they slowly trying to kill me? Somehow, the tubes make it easier for me to breathe.

Is this how I will spend the rest of eternity? Covered with tubes just so I can breathe?

I certainly hope not because I’ve seen other humans’ faces and they don’t have tubes all over them.

Unless they’re implanted inside them so that they cannot be seen? The world is a very strange place but I’m sure I’ll learn as I grow.

~

I wake with a jump. I look around me. My room is normal. Rex is fast asleep. I look over at my clock and it reads 1:00am. Was I just dreaming? Surely I was just dreaming?

I was a baby again. I experienced my birth again and the hours that passed afterwards. It isn’t possible for that to happen in real life.

Is it? I lay back down and stare at my ceiling. I’ve got school tomorrow and I am knackered. I can’t sleep and me ‘experiencing’ my birth again has just caused me to become extra tired and I won’t get enough sleep now. The blue stone has stopped glowing. Was the stone responsible for what just happened? Surely it can’t be. That would be impossible, right?

I close my eyes in the hope that I’ll just drift off to sleep again. But I can’t stop worrying about everything. Something happened and I can’t figure out how or why.

Chapter 9

“Morning,” says Mum.

“I had the weirdest dream last night,” I say. “I dreamt that I experienced my birth all over again.”

“Oh really? That is odd.”

“Mmm.”

Mum looks at me. “What was that mumble for?” she laughs.

“What? Oh nothing. I’m just tired.”

Mum shakes her head and places a bowl of fruit and cereal in front of me. “Eat up,” she says. “School today.”

I get lost in thought for a moment. “Actually, I don’t really feel well,” I lie. “Can I have the day off?”

Mum feels my forehead. “You look fine,” she tells me.

“I got no sleep. It is making me feel sick and is giving me a banging headache.”

Mum looks at me. She obviously thinks I’m lying to bunk off school. “Give it ten minutes,” she says. “If you still feel ill, then I’ll call the school.”

I smile. I am actually ill. No sleep is making me feel it. But I highly doubt that in ten minutes, I’ll be bouncing off walls!

~

It has now been ten minutes. “I still feel ill,” I say.

“Okay. I’ll call the school,” replies Mum. As she calls the school, I sneakily text Dad.

Mum seems much more cheerful now. I’ll ask her if you can come home tonight. Ben.

I send Dad the text and wait for a reply. When Mum comes back over, I look up at her and ask her the question.

“Can Dad come home tonight?” I ask. Mum looks at me for a minute. The look she gives me can be taken in two ways. It can either be ‘are you serious?’ or ‘of course’. And I’m unsure which one it is. “Maybe,” she says. “I need to feel ready.”

I’m confused again. “Ready for what?” I ask.

“To face your father again,” she tells me. “After everything that happened…”

“Nothing happened. Well if it did, it was down to you.”

I fear another argument is brewing so I try to remain calm just in case Mum goes off the rails again. “Down to me?” she snaps. “I’ve been nothing but…”

“Abusive, hurtful, controlling, manipulative. Should I go on?”

I feel bad for interrupting like that. But it had to be said. She doesn’t see what she did to Dad. What she did hurt him a lot.

And it hurt me too purely for the fact that I’m worried that the same thing could happen to me in the future when I eventually get married and have kids.

Mum doesn’t say anything afterwards. She just struts into the kitchen and makes a cup of coffee. I should go back to bed really. I am ill this time. Not like the other night when I was at the beach.

I stand up and walk up the stairs, one step at a time.

My bedroom is quiet. Rex is still snoring away on my bed. I don’t know why he has to sleep on my bed all the time. He has his own one in the corner of my room.

I slide under my duvet and get myself comfortable. Hopefully I’ll get some decent sleep during the day if I’m not getting any at night. I close my eyes and slowly drift off to sleep.

~

Rex wakes me up by digging at me. He is whimpering as if something is wrong. “What Rex?” I groan. “I need to sleep.”

I turn over and look at my clock. 13:23pm. Wow. I’ve been sleeping for about four hours now. I slowly sit up and invite Rex over to lay on me.

“You wanna go out?” I say. “Come on then.”

Rex jumps off my bed onto the floor and waits for me to get out of bed and open the door to allow him to run downstairs.

I open the door and Rex immediately runs downstairs towards the kitchen. He scratches at the back door. “Alright, alright,” I say firmly. He stops scratching and waits as I unlock the door. Mum has obviously gone out as she isn’t in the house. Maybe she’s gone to the shop.

Rex comes back in and I close the door. The cold, winter air brushes through the house.

“Gosh, it’s freezing out there!” I whisper to myself. I sit on the sofa and switch the TV on.

Rex jumps up on the sofa next to me and goes to sleep – again. I hear the front door open and click shut.

“Feel better?” says Mum.

“Yeah, a little bit,” I say. “Where have you been?”

“Oh I just went to meet Jan for a bit.”

“Who’s Jan?”

“A friend.”

I roll my eyes. Mum isn’t very specific when she tells me (or anyone) things. It’s like she is trying to hide something. Did she really go to see Jan?

She wanders through to the kitchen and looks out into the back garden. “He’s pooped out there,” she tells me. “You’ll have to pick that up.”

“Um…” I begin. “I’m ill. Why can’t you do it?”

“He’s your dog.”

“And it’s his poo!”

“A dog can’t pick up his own poo. Either pick it up now or let it go hard and frosty and pick it up tomorrow.”

“Mum that’s disgusting!” I exclaim.

Mum laughs. She doesn’t care about what she says, as long as she says it. “I’ve got a surprise for you tonight,” she suddenly says. “I think you’re gonna love it!”

Hmm…now when Mum says she’s got a surprise for someone and they’re ‘gonna love it’ it usually turns out rubbish and no one likes it.

So this better make up for all those times when I haven’t loved the ‘surprises’ she has given me in the past.

“Will I?” I ask.

“I certainly hope so!”

Mum laughs to herself as she puts the kettle on. “If you met Jan earlier, wouldn’t you have had tea or coffee then? Why do you need one now?” I curiously ask.

Mum freezes for a moment. Is this it? Is this the moment she’s been caught out and actually hasn’t been to see Jan?

“I want another one,” she says. “You know what I’m like with tea.”

I laugh. It’s true. She does like her tea. “Why didn’t you tell me you were going out?” I quickly ask. I don’t know where all these questions are coming from. I’m just curious I suppose. I just want to know where my mother has been.

“Why all the questions?” squeaks Mum. “You looked peaceful and I didn’t want to disturb you.”

I mumble. Something doesn’t add up. My suspicions are arising. Is Mum cheating on Dad?

Chapter 10

It is the evening now. Mum said she has a surprise for me but she still hasn’t presented it to me yet. I’m desperate to know what it is. All that keeps crossing my mind is my mum cheating on my dad. And she isn’t exactly making the situation any easier by making up excuses and acting guilty. I can sense guilt by the way she speaks. She’s guilty about something. But whatever it is, it better be good.

“You’ll get your surprise soon,” she suddenly pipes up. I look up at her. “When is ‘soon’?” I ask.

“Soon.”

I roll my eyes. Again, she’s not being very specific. She picks up her mobile and starts typing into it. I don’t know what she’s texting or who she’s texting. “Who are you texting?” I ask.

“None of your business,” replies Mum, smiling.

She’s being sneaky…I don’t like it.

~

It’s been 45 minutes now since Mum texted whoever she was texting and I still have not got this ‘surprise’. “Right I’m getting fed up now,” I snap. “When is this ‘surprise’ going to be given to me?”

I’m getting seriously annoyed. Is Mum going back to her old ways? Making promises and then breaking them? “It’ll be here soon,” says Mum.

“Oh so it’s being delivered?” I reply. “Is it a bike? An iPad? A moped?”

I smile, hopeful it could be any of those. “You’ve already got a bike, you have no need for an iPad and you’re too young for a moped.” Mum laughs. I scowl, now feeling grumpy.

Suddenly, the doorbell rings. “Looks like your surprise is here!” Mum sings, dashing to the front door. “Fred!” cheers Mum. That’s when I realize what my surprise is. Dad has finally come home! “Dad!” I cry as he bursts into the living room with a huge grin on his face.

“Hi son,” says Dad. “We’re finally together again as a family.”

I smile. I’m so happy we’re all together again. Mum stands in the doorway, eyes gleaming in happiness. I know I only last saw Dad a couple of days ago but we haven’t been together as a family for almost a week now.

“How do you like your surprise?” Mum asks.

“I love it!” I chime. “Just treat Dad right this time. No man deserves to be treated the way you treated Dad. Please try harder.”

A tear trickles down Mum’s face. “I’ll try my best,” whispers Mum. Dad looks at us both and then suddenly speaks up. “Right,” he says. “Who wants to help me unpack the car?”

“I will!” I cheerfully reply.

“Me too,” says Mum.

The three of us go outside and open the car. I search through everything as the first thing I want to take in is Milo.

Where’s Milo? He’s not here. Please don’t tell me Dad has forgotten to bring him home!

“Dad!” I call. “Where’s Milo?”

Dad looks at me. “Oh Ben!” he says. “I forgot to pick him up when I was packing our bags back at Max’s.”

I frown. “Don’t worry though, I’ll go back tomorrow to pick him up.” Dad reassures me.

I smile. I’d prefer it if he went back tonight to get him but I suppose that there is no rush for it. We carry on taking things out of the car.

“What’s this?” I ask, holding up some rag.

“Oh,” laughs Dad. “That is a present to you from Max.”

“What even is it?”

“It’s a ‘peace blanket’.”

I laugh. I’ve never heard anything quite so ridiculous. What makes a blanket peaceful? Other than the fact it can keep you warm at night.

“What makes this blanket peaceful then?” I question.

“God knows.” Dad laughs back.

Mum comes back out and smiles. “What’s the joke?” she says.

“Oh we’re just laughing at this blanket that Uncle Max has gifted me,” I explain. “It’s a nice thought but it is so ridiculous.”

“What’s so special about the blanket that’s ridiculous then?”

I look at Dad and smirk. “Apparently,” I start. “It’s a ‘peace blanket’.”

Mum looks at Dad and me for a moment before scowling. “I’ve had one of those before,” she tells us. “The peace blanket is supposed to give off peaceful vibes whenever you feel stressed or anxious.”

“What happened with yours then?”

“I ditched it. It ran out of its peacefulness when I continued feeling stressed, anxious and angry even after using the blanket.”

I can’t help but laugh.

“You seriously believe in that superstitious rubbish?” I ask her, laughing.

“Yes.” Mum says, bluntly.

Dad and I look at each other again, both knowing that our jokes about the blanket had hit a nerve inside Mum.

~

It has been a good evening so far. Now we’re all back together again, Mum suggested doing something together to bond again. Not that there was any need for it of course.

Our bonds are already strong. But we did it for Mum. We played a few games – Snakes & Ladders, Cluedo, Jenga – you name it, we played it.

Then we sat down and watched a film together. Personally, I didn’t like it. It was one of those sad, soppy, romantic films that Mum and Dad used to like watching together once I was in bed. And I cannot believe that they made me sit down and watch it with them.

It was a completely ridiculous film. It was about a ship that hit an iceberg and sank. And a guy who could swim perfectly well as he stayed afloat long enough to say a love speech to his girlfriend, suddenly sank. He could have swam across the ocean!

Mum was crying when it finished. Dad was snoring. I was on my phone. Mum obviously didn’t realize I was on my phone as I was texting Kai through most of it.

His bike has been found luckily. He says the police found it dumped in a woodland area. They haven’t found the thief but Kai doesn’t care.

He’s just happy to have his bike back. But really, Kai should care. Someone took his bike!

It could have been someone from out of the school. Some strange person could have wandered in and took it. I just hope that it was someone from school though. There’s someone in Year 11 who has form for this sort of thing though. Julian Holmes is his name. He was arrested a few months ago for shoplifting.

He didn’t shoplift alone though. His girlfriend, Sarah Edmonds was with him. I think it was a pressurized crime though. I don’t know who was pressured into it. But that’s how it seems.

~

I’m in bed. My room has a glow to it tonight. But that’s because of the moon. It is extremely bright and it is coming through the window and forcing its way through the curtains as well. I hate it. It is keeping me awake. Even with my eyes shut, I can still see the light.

I turn over and face the other way but I still see the moonlight reflecting on the wall. I think of ways I could block the light out but none of them are possible. So I just need to deal with it.

But I can’t. I get up and walk to my parents’ room. “I can’t sleep,” I moan. “The moonlight coming through my window is too bright.”

Dad sits up.

“Then face the other way,” he says.

“I did. But it didn’t work. I can still see the light through my eyelids.”

I had been in bed for about 90 minutes. I usually nod off quite quickly but lately I haven’t been. And tonight is even worse. “Then just keep your eyes shut and think of happy things,” suggests Dad. “You’ll nod off eventually.”

I sigh. At this point, I don’t think anything will help me sleep. I drag myself back to bed and pull the duvet right up to my jaw. My room is pretty cold. I do as Dad said and close my eyes. What can I think of? Kai getting his bike back? No, that’s a bit weird.

And it’s hardly something I should mentally celebrate. There’s nothing really for me to think about. At this moment in time, I don’t have many hopes for the future so I can’t visualize it.

~

The same pain digs through me again. I feel like I’m getting stabbed in the kidneys by some mass murderer! I open my eyes and groan in agony. I can’t bare the pain much longer. I hold my sides, hoping it will somehow sooth the pain.

It doesn’t. I look at the blue stone again. It’s glowing. Just like it was last night. I hope I’m dreaming and that I’ll wake up and it’ll be like nothing ever happened.

But then the stone starts smoking. The same blue smoke from yesterday. It makes me cough. I know I’m coughing. I can feel it. But the smoke slowly starts blocking out the sound so I can’t hear anything. And no one else will either.

I stand up and follow the direction of the smoke. It forms an arrow and points me towards the window?

“You want me to jump out of the window?” I say. I’m confused. Why do I have to go to the window?

I pull open the curtains and see that the window has disappeared. It’s is a blue portal – just like the one from yesterday!

I hesitate for a moment. Should I jump through? Or should I just go back to bed and ignore everything?

I’m curious as to what I will witness tonight though. Yesterday it was my birth? What’s next?

I brace myself for impact. The funny feeling that will go through me as I fall through the portal. I bend my knees and dive straight into the portal.

“Arrrrggghhhhh!” I scream as I fall.

Chapter 11

Everything is shiny. The mirror, the skirting board, the doorframe, the tree in the corner of the room… The tree in the corner of the room! Why is there a tree in the house? And more importantly, why is it covered in strange objects? Lights, tinsel, and balls hanging from the branches. That’s when I realize where I am. It’s Christmas! I look around the living room and I see Mum, Dad and me. I’m six months old. So this is my first Christmas!

I stare the Christmas tree up and down admiring its beauty. This was the only time Mum and Dad had put a real Christmas tree up in the house since I’ve been here. Because the following Christmas (in this case, next Christmas), Mum and Dad put an artificial one up because they couldn’t be dealing with the tree needles falling on the floor.

I crawl around on the floor, touching the presents that lay under the tree. Dad comes over and picks me up.

“Not yet buddy,” he tells me. “Santa has left lots of presents for you here.”

He carries me over to the brown sofa that sits at the back of the living room. It is populated with neatly wrapped presents. I wonder what they are!

Dad helps me open my first present. It’s a Teletubby playset. I remember getting that. I played with it all the time until I reached the age of three and a half. Then I grew out of it and wanted other things like cars and soft toys.

“Wow!” gleams Mum. “Look what Santa’s got you!”

I giggle. I was such a cute baby. Anything and everything made me laugh back then. I shake and wave my arms about, wanting Dad to open my next present. He picks it up and I start patting it, somehow hoping it will unwrap itself if I did that. Dad opens it for me and places it in front of me.

It is a Thomas the Tank Engine storybook. Mum and Dad sit me in front of the TV all the time when Thomas the Tank Engine is on. And for a six month old baby, I actually really enjoy it.

Mum and Dad alternate in telling me bedtime stories and I usually fall asleep pretty quickly.

I do like bedtime stories. And now Santa has brought me a new one.

Mum opens my next present. She insisted. It is very big. A bit too big to be gifted to a baby in my opinion.

The wrapping paper drops to the floor. I don’t know why Santa got it for me. It’s not as if I’ll be a chef in the future. It’s a plastic kitchen set. Mum gleams. “Wow!” she says. “Look at this!”

I giggle again. Christmas is now officially my favourite time of year. It seems like great fun. After all, you get free stuff. And it’s all wrapped up in paper decorated with snowmen, gingerbread men, Santa Claus’, elves, snowflakes etc.

There are plenty more presents under the tree. A huge pile. I wonder if they’re all for me. I’ve got enough already. Then I see a giant sock hanging on our fireplace. I gurgle and giggle as I point to it. I jump up and down on my bottom in the process. “Haha, you want your stocking do you?” Mum laughs. “Hang on bubba, I’ll get it for you.”

Mum stands up and skips over to the fireplace. She unhooks the stocking from the hook and brings it back over.

“Right, lets see what’s in here then,” she says happily. One by one, she brings out some slightly smaller presents.

There are tiny hardback books in there. And they’re Thomas the Tank Engine again!

~

A tear runs down my face as I remember the happiness I felt as a child. The happiness we all felt. It was at times like this that we were a proper family. Before things fell apart.

~

A smell runs through the house.

It’s coming from the kitchen. Mum and Dad are obviously making something whilst I’m playing with the Teletubbies. I look over at the tree. There is still a big pile of presents under it. I’m curious to know what’s under the wrapping paper and why Mum and Dad are keeping me from opening them.

I crawl over to the tree and start touching presents. But Mum comes in. “No Ben,” she says. “We’ll open those presents later.”

Feeling like I’ve been naughty, I start to cry. “Aw don’t cry,” says Mum, trying to comfort me. “We’ll open them soon I promise.”

She puts me back down on the floor in front of the Teletubby playset. I don’t really feel like playing with it anymore. I’m too upset.

~

The time comes when we can finally open the presents under the tree. Mum hands one to Dad. Why didn’t she give it to me? Is it not for me? Why isn’t it for me? I’m a baby! I should get all the presents and attention!

Dad reads the label. “To Fred, love Helen,” he reads. He smiles as he begins to take the wrapping paper off. “Aw thanks Helen,” he says, holding up a box. As he opens it, Mum peeks over, smiling. If she already know what it is, why is she trying to see what it is? Adults are strange. I don’t know what it is. Of course I don’t.

It’s probably an adult thing where they don’t tell children what they’ve got each other. The next present is for me. Yay! Mum opens it for me. “This is from Nanny Georgia,” she says. “My mummy.”

I look at it. It is clothes. Clothes? Clothes?! Why would you buy a baby clothes for Christmas? Babies should get toys and maybe books for bedtime! Not clothes! Ugh! Eww! “Look at them,” says Mum in a babyish voice. “They’ve got puppies on them!”

What the heck is a puppy? Why don’t I ever get told about these things? I need to know!

Mum shows me the clothes. They look like clothes I wear in bed. I assume they’re my pajamas.

Oh that’s a puppy! A four-legged furry creature with something strange on its backend. Mum puts the clothes aside with my presents from Santa. The next present Mum pulls out is for her and it’s from Dad. She hands it to Dad. Why the hell is she handing it to Dad? It’s for her isn’t it?

Dad then hands it back. What? What are they doing? Are they confused?

“Thanks love,” says Mum. Grown-ups, especially parents, are super strange.

Mum opens it and sees a box. She opens the box and it shines. She pulls it out and holds it in her hands. “Wow,” she says. “It’s lovely.”

I’ve seen her wear something like it before. It is supposed to go around her neck. I don’t know why she needs to decorate her neck for. It isn’t a Christmas tree!

~

The dinner table is up and a cloth has gone over it. We finished opening the presents under the tree about half an hour ago.

Mum places two glasses on the table and puts a medium-sized glass bottle in the middle. The liquid inside is red. Oh no! Red liquid?! Why are they drinking blood?

I’m sat in my high-chair. It’s what babies have to sit in when eating for some reason.

I’m unsure why though. But it’s great. I get my own mini table and it even has a cup holder!

Mum comes through and places a big plate with a turkey on it. Not a live one obviously. A cooked one. Dad comes through with two bowls full of vegetables. “Merry Christmas,” says Dad as he sits down.

“Merry Christmas,” replies Mum. Dad peeks around Mum and sees it is snowing outside. “Oh wow!” he says. “Looks like we’ve got a white Christmas after all.”

Mum turns around to look and smiles. “It’s beautiful,” she gleams. “Oh I do love the snow.”

A small bowl is put in front of me. Whilst trying to eat her own dinner, Mum tries to feed me mine too. She has given me a small bit of turkey and a few small chopped up vegetables.

I’m not even sure if I’m allowed solid food at my age but I try it anyway. It’s nice. Well, the vegetables are anyway.

The turkey on the other hand…well I don’t like it. I don’t want it again that’s for sure.

“Come on Benny,” says Mum. “Finish your turkey.”

I whimper and push her arm away. I do not want the turkey again!

She gives up. “How about some veg?” she says.

She tries to feed me the vegetables instead. First, it is a slice of carrot. I eat it. “Good boy,” says Mum. “More?”

I happily eat the vegetables. When I finish the vegetables, Mum tries to feed me turkey again. But I refuse. “Just leave him, love,” says Dad. “He’s clearly a fussy eater.”

He smiles at me. But I look away. I don’t like the turkey and I don’t like the fact Mum is trying to make me eat it.

~

It’s night time. Mum tucks me into bed and takes one of the Thomas the Tank Engine books from the boxset and reads it to me.

“Thomas chugged along the train track…” begins Mum.

~

Gasp! I sit up in bed, breathing heavily. I look around me. Once again, Rex is fast asleep in his bed. Last night, I thought it was all a dream. But it has happened again tonight.

It is all very strange to me. Can it be a dream? Surely it is.

Chapter 12

“It’s happened again,” I say to Mum.

“What’s happened again?” Mum replies.

“The dream. Only the other night, I dreamt about getting reborn again and then last night, I dreamt that it was my first Christmas again!”

Dad looks at me. He doesn’t know it happened. Of course he doesn’t! I haven’t told him. “What’s going on?” he asks, confused. I sit down next to him to explain. “I keep having dreams that I’m living my past,” I explain. “The other night, I dreamt that I was born again. Then last night, I dreamt that it was my first Christmas.

Mum kept trying to feed me turkey even though I really didn’t like it.”

Dad looks at Mum. “I remember that,” he says.

“So do I,” laughs Mum. “You were such a fussy eater, Ben. But I don’t know how you managed to remember.”

“That’s the thing!” I exclaim. “Something is making me remember!”

Mum and Dad both look at me. “It’s probably just a phase. You’re getting older and you’re remembering your childhood.” Mum says. “It happened to me when I was about your age.”

“But that was probably different,” I say. “Of course you’ll remember such trauma you experienced as a child.”

Mum frowns. I know she doesn’t like to reminded of her horrific childhood. But I felt like I had to mention it, purely because she seems to think my experiences from these past couple of nights is to do with age and not conspiracy. Something is definitely going on.

“You should get ready for school,” says Dad. “You’ve got a reading exam today.”

“Do I?” I ask.

“Yes. Your mother showed me a letter that came through.”

“When?”

“Last week,” says Mum.

I look at her. Why didn’t she tell me there was an exam? Does she want me to not attend an exam? I mean, I’d quite happily not attend but I do need to go to them so why would she keep it from me?

“Why didn’t you tell me?” I shout. “I’m not prepared!”

“I couldn’t tell you!” shouts Mum.

“Oh yeah I forgot,” I sarcastically say. “You kicked me and Dad out!”

Mum looks at me, shocked. Dad doesn’t look at me nor Mum and does not say a word either. “Just get ready for school Ben!” angrily says Mum.

I go upstairs to get ready. Really, I should regret what I said. But for some reason, I don’t.

Why should I? After all, I am right. What I said was right. Mum knows it. Dad knows it. I know it. When I come back downstairs, Dad is stood at the bottom of the stairs.

“You need to apologize,” he tells me. “Or we’ll have to move out permanently!”

Is Mum for real? She’s going to kick us out – again – if I don’t apologize for being right? Unbelievable. Realizing that there isn’t much point faffing around, I slowly walk into the kitchen and apologize. “I’m sorry Mum,” I say. “I didn’t mean it. It just came out.”

Mum nods. “It’s fine. Now go to school,” she says. I don’t see the point in trying any more so I just leave. “See you later,” I grumpily say as I walk past Dad.

~

School is full of people. Students, teachers, parents and OFSTED. Oh yeah, I didn’t say. Mr Williams told us in an assembly last week that OFSTED would be coming to school to inspect everything.

My ICT teacher, Mr Oaks panicked when he found out because he only ever messes around in lessons. He doesn’t actually teach us – which is great!

But today, he’s had to plan a whole lesson and has actually got to teach us otherwise he could lose his job. And our class doesn’t want that because that would mean having a new teacher who would make us do work.

“I’ll have to plan a lesson,” he told us that day. “But don’t worry, I’ll make it fun. I’ll just teach you how to make a simple game.”

I’m okay with that. I mean, I like playing games on my phone and computer all the time so making one would be great.

Well we wouldn’t actually make it of course. Most of the people in my class moaned. “Can’t we just barricade the door instead?” suggested Gregory Fisher. “That way, they won’t be able to come in!”

Mr Oaks didn’t look very pleased about that. “If we barricaded the door,” he told us. “Then I would be accused of holding you all prisoners and I’d lose my job!”

I laughed at the suggestion of barricading the door but Mr Oaks didn’t see the funny side at all. Well when I say I laughed, I mean I laughed at how stupid Gregory sounded.

~

“Kai!” I shout as I make my way over to my locker. “You alright?”

Kai looks at me. “What happened?” I say, shocked. He’s been beaten up. Black eye, cut lip. “The ‘lads’ in year eleven did it,” he explains. “Because I wouldn’t give them my lunch money.”

I try not to laugh. The ‘get beat up for not giving over lunch money’ trend is so last decade!

“It isn’t funny!” cries Kai, spotting my smirk I’ve been trying so hard to hide.

“I know it isn’t,” I reply. “Have you told Mr Williams?”

“Oh and what’s he going to do? Give them a slap on the wrist!”

I look at Kai. He’s obviously been scarred for life by this. After all, he’s never been beaten up before. If only I was there. I could have stopped them. I could have taken the beating instead!

“Come on,” I say. “Let’s go to class.”

~

We settle down in Mr Oaks’ class.

OFSTED haven’t arrived to our class yet. “Right settle down!” calls Mr Oaks. “Time for the register. Joshua…”

When he finishes the register, he explains what we’ll be doing today. “Today, I’m going to teach you how to make ‘Snake’.” Mr Oaks says. “We’ll be using DigiGame to make it.”

He shows us the software and begins explaining how to use it.

He looks out of the window on the door just to see if OFSTED are here yet. They’re not.

The last time they visited, my mathematics teacher organized a whole lesson and they didn’t even come to the lesson! And I know that if OFSTED don’t come to this ICT lesson, Mr Oaks will not be happy at all.

~

“Good day at school?” asks Mum.

“Yeah it was alright,” I reply. “OFSTED were in today.”

“How was your exam?”

“Easy.”

Mum nods. “That’s good. We’re going out for dinner tonight,” she says. “To celebrate your Grandfather’s 75th birthday.”

“Okay,” I say. “I’ll just go upstairs and get changed.”

I can’t believe it is my Grandad’s birthday today. To be honest, I totally forgot. I don’t know how I forgot considering I bought a card last week but somehow, I forgot.

The card is in a draw somewhere so I need to dig it out. I just hope that I haven’t lost it because if I have, then I’m screwed. I won’t have a card for my Grandad and it’ll be a bit embarrassing for me but very upsetting for him.

Aha! Found it. I quickly write it and put it in the envelope that came with it.

“I’m ready to go,” I say as I run downstairs. That’s when I see Dad’s face. He is crying and Mum is comforting him.

“Son,” says Mum. “I think you better sit down.”

I sit on the sofa and Mum sits down next to me. Dad sits in the chair. “Can you tell him?” asks Dad. “I’m too upset.”

Mum nods. “What’s happening?” I ask, worriedly.

“We’ve just had a call from your gran,” says Mum. “Your Grandad passed away half an hour ago.”

“What?” I cry. “No!”

Dad nods, crying even more. “I’m so sorry son,” Dad cries, walking over to me and giving me a hug. I begin to cry. Why now? On his birthday? This world is very cruel!

“So we’re not going out for a meal,” says Mum. “We’ll go to your gran’s house instead to comfort her.”

I nod. “I can’t believe he’s gone on his birthday!” I cry. I hug Dad, wanting to comfort him.

“I know,” he says. “How cruel does this world need to be?”

Chapter 13

We’ve just got home from my gran’s. She is extremely upset over Grandad’s passing. I mean, what can you expect? He is…was her husband. “I think we should all have an early night,” says Mum. “Emotions are running high so sleep may do us some good. Ben, I’ll call school tomorrow and tell them you won’t be in for a few weeks due to a family bereavement.”

I nod. “Thanks Mum,” I say. I go upstairs and straight to my room. I felt awkward when I was with Grandma. I didn’t know what to say. So I just sat there silently. Uncle Max was there with us too. Whilst Mum was comforting Grandma, Dad and Uncle Max were comforting each other.

And then there was me. Sitting on the sofa, not saying a word, not even knowing what to say.

I sit on the edge of my bed, staring at the wall. It’s only seven o’clock but I don’t think I’d be able to sit downstairs and watch TV with Mum and Dad at the moment.

Our emotions are running too high.

Rex pops his head up from his bed and comes over to me, jumping onto my bed. He can sense I’m upset. He licks my face and tries to snuggle into me. “Good boy,” I say. Rex definitely is man’s best friend.

My phone rings. It’s Kai. “Hi Kai,” I say. “Look, I’m not in the mood to talk at the moment. I’ll call you tomorrow.”

Before he can even say anything, I hang up. I wonder for a moment. Maybe I shouldn’t have just hung up like that. I could have waited for him to say something. But oh well.

~

It is half past eight. Mum comes into my room to make sure I’m okay. “You alright?” she asks me.

“Yeah, I’m fine,” I reply. “I think I just need some sleep.”

“That’s probably for the best. Night, night.”

She leaves the room and closes the door behind her. Rex is laying next to me on my bed.

My room is pretty cold so I’ve completely wrapped myself up in my duvet.

I’m really not in the mood for any of those weird dreams I’ve been having these past couple of nights so I better not have another one tonight because it will make me feel worse.

On the plus side though, if I do have one of those weird dreams tonight, I’ll be able to have a lay in to catch up on the sleep I miss as I won’t be in school for the next few weeks.

I flick through my phone, looking at the photos of me and Grandad. Each photo holds a memory special to me. I find one of when we went to Blackpool three years ago. That was a great day out. Dad tried to build a sand-car, but he dug it a bit too deep and he ended up falling in. Grandad tried to help him out but he fell in too.

That was the funniest day of my life I think I’ve ever experienced. And now, those memories won’t be able to become a reality again – because my Grandad has gone. But at least he’s out of pain now. That is the one main thing I should focus on.

~

I slowly drift in and out of sleep. I want to sleep because I’m tired from crying all evening. But I don’t want to sleep because I have some hope that my Grandad may appear in my room and say it was all a prank and that he is really still alive. But I know that won’t happen.

Death is the final curtain for everyone. And once that curtain has been drawn shut, that’s it. It’s over. Finished.

The idea of death scares me. And it scares me even more now knowing Grandad has passed away. I don’t want to even think about when my turn will come.

Because that will really scare me. It would mean that my life would be over. And what if I don’t achieve anything in life? What if my life is miserable?

No. Stop thinking like this Benjamin Harding! The thought of death is now controlling my mind almost making sleep impossible by now. What if I die tonight? BENJAMIN HARDING! STOP THINKING LIKE THIS NOW!

I can’t help it. I just can’t help it!

Chapter 14

Blue flashes pass through my eyelids. I slowly open my eyes to see the stone flashing again. Smoke starts to emerge and fill my bedroom. My wardrobe doors disappear and take the appearance of a portal.

“Why is this happening to me?!” I shout, knowing full well that no one can hear me.

The stone forces me towards the wardrobe. I don’t want to witness my past again. It’s too painful. NOOOOOOO! Stop!

Black. Darkness. I can’t see a thing. I open my eyes and the sun stares at me directly in the eyes. “Ouch,” I whisper. I sit up and look to my left. It’s me with my mum, my dad and my grandparents. It’s our trip to Blackpool in 2015. Why am I being tortured like this?

My Grandad died today and now I’m being forced to relive a time when he was alive. Yes it is nice.

But it is torture knowing I won’t personally see him again.

I just wish he could see me right now so I could give him one last joke.

He loved jokes. Especially mine. They were bad. But he didn’t care. He found them funny anyway.

I slowly walk over to the sandy beach and find myself watching Dad and Grandad building a sand-car. “Fred!” shouts Grandad. “Stop flicking sand into my eyes!”

I laugh as I remember this is the moment they fall in. “Sorry,” replies Dad. Dad turns around and sees Mum and Grandma sitting on deck chairs. He waves and steps back. But as he does, he falls into the sand-car. “Argghh!” screams Dad. Mum and Grandma burst into laughter. Grandad and I look at each other and giggle. “You alright down there, son?” laughs Grandad.

“Yep,” calls Dad.

Grandad gets onto his front and reaches his hand down into the hole where Dad is now standing up. Dad grabs ahold of Grandad’s arm. But then he falls in too. This time, me, Mum and Grandma are all laughing hysterically. Mum and I had to help them both out.

We found a rope at the shore rescue team center and pulled them out. “You two are right numpties!” laughs Grandma.

“Thanks for that Mum!” giggles Dad. “Maybe we should get some fish and chips for lunch now.”

“Sounds like a plan,” says Mum. “Come on, let’s go.”

We all go over to the chippie and order our favourite portions from there. I had a medium chip portion with two jumbo sausages. It’s nice. Only with ketchup. “How can you have ketchup squirted all over like that?” asks Grandma, clearly disgusted.

“Easy,” I reply. “It’s delicious.”

Grandma shakes her head. I smile. We all sit inside to eat. It is hot inside but we don’t fancy having a seagull steal our chips or poo on them.

We’ve decided to go to the Blackpool Tower this afternoon before we go back to the hotel. Mum has always wanted to go there. She says if she ever knew how to ballroom dance, she’d go to the Tower Ballroom to show off her moves.

She only says that whenever Strictly is on. Otherwise she doesn’t say a word about it.

But she has always said she’s wanted to go to the Tower anyway. So we are. Dad has paid for the tickets as a treat for all of us.

~

The Blackpool Tower is amazing! I didn’t realize how big it actually was until I went in. “It’s beautiful!” cries Mum. “I would live here if I could!”

We’re told there’s a ballroom and Latin dance competition happening in the Ballroom at two o’clock and tickets to watch it are £3.50 per adult.

Dad decides to pay for the tickets so Mum can go into the Ballroom and watch people dance – badly in my opinion. “I can’t wait,” says Mum excitedly. We head back outside to go to the souvenir shops whilst we wait for two o’clock to arrive.

“Can I have this?” I ask, pointing to an inflatable crocodile.

“What do you want that for?” Mum asks me. “We don’t have a pool.”

“We could get one.”

“And what if your dog bites it and it bursts? That’s a waste of five quid then!”

I sigh. I know I’m not going to win this debate. “Fine,” I say. I pick up a stick of rock instead and go and look at the postcards and fridge magnets.

I pick up a few postcards – not to send to anyone – just to build up a collection of pictures of places I’ve been to, and I pick up a magnet of a donkey too. “Got everything you want?” asks Mum.

“Yes,” I say. “Can we go pay?”

“Yeah, come on.”

We arrive at the Blackpool Tower Ballroom and we take our seats. The Ballroom is lit with orange and red colours. “It looks amazing!” I say. “Looks better than it does on telly!”

“It does, doesn’t it?” exclaims Mum. “I love it!”

Suddenly, the lights dim and music starts. A group of about fifteen adults comes out and they start dancing around to upbeat, catchy music. “Woooooo!” cheers Mum, right into my ear.

“For crying out loud!” I shout. “Don’t scream in my ear!”

~

We get back to the hotel and settle in for the night. It is six o’clock.

“Do you want any dinner or have you had enough to eat today?” Mum asks me and Dad. Grandma and Grandad are in the room opposite us. They’ve probably had an early night as they often do most nights.

“I think we’ve probably had enough today,” laughs Dad. “Ay, son?”

“Yeah,” I reply.

I’m still gutted I didn’t get the inflatable crocodile but at least I’ve got a magnet and a few postcards to give me some memories.

Plus Mum and Dad took loads of photos on their phones so they can make a scrapbook when we get back home. I don’t see the point in scrapbooks. We’ve got technology these days to keep the memories.

“Shall we just have an early night?” Mum asks.

“No,” I scream.

“Yes!” Dad screams at the same time.

~

I open my eyes. It’s one o’clock in the morning.

The stone next to my bed starts to fade of its colour. Why is my life suddenly turning out like this? I’ve started to realize that all these images of my past aren’t dreams. They’re real! I am reliving my life! But I don’t know what’s causing it. Is it the stone? I certainly hope not because I really like the stone.

I throw my head back down onto my pillow and roll over to try and fall back to sleep. But I can’t. Now that I’m awake, I can’t get back to sleep.

Sometimes I feel like I have insomnia because I just can’t sleep. Every night, I only get 4-5 hours of sleep.

Maybe not even that if something keeps me awake. Thoughts? Noises? Mental disturbances? I don’t know what it is that keeps me awake.

I close my eyes in the hope that I fall asleep.

Then slowly but surely, I start to drift off back to sleep…

Chapter 15

I go downstairs. It’s ten o’clock in the morning. “Morning sleepy head,” jokes Mum.

“Morning,” I reply. “What’s for breakfast?”

“Whatever you want. Toast, cereal, pancakes?”

“I think I might have pancakes today,” I say.

Mum smiles. “Coming right up!”

I sit down at the kitchen table opposite Dad and sit in silence. Dad doesn’t mutter a word to me. He has been emotional for the past day though. And if I’m honest, I think this is the first time Dad has been able to show emotion without Mum judging him and telling him to ‘man up’.

“Here you go,” says Mum, putting a plate of pancakes down in front of me.

“Thanks,” I say.

I look at Dad. He seems really down. Not the typical bereavement sad. It is more extreme than that. I’ve never seen him so sad in my entire life. “Are you alright, Dad?” I finally ask.

“What?” he mumbles. “Yeah I’m fine.”

He carries on reading the newspaper. When he’s upset, he always reads a newspaper to keep his mind occupied. “Ha look,” says Dad unhappily. “A chef had a cake thrown at him in Manchester because it contained carrot.”

Mum can’t help but smile. “And what type of cake was it supposed to be?” she giggled.

“A carrot cake!” exclaimed Dad.

Mum bursts into hysterical laughter. “Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha!” she screams. “What is wrong with people these days? Ha, ha ha!”

I can’t help but laugh either. But sadly, Dad can’t laugh. He’s too sad. “Glad you two can enjoy your lives,” he grumbles.

I stop laughing.

I don’t want to seem like I don’t care anymore. Of course I do! I’m just trying to have fun as well as grieve for my Grandad.

That often helps. When my hamster died last year, I was too upset to leave the house.

But with the help of TV comedy programs, I was able to have a laugh as well. However when my Aunt Jessie passed away a few months ago, I wasn’t as upset. Merely because I barely knew her. I didn’t know how to grieve for someone who I had only met two or three times in my lifetime. But she did live in Australia so it was a bit difficult to see her anyway.

Dad wanted us to go out to Australia for a few weeks so we could spend time with her husband and children but I couldn’t go because of school and Mum didn’t want to go because she was afraid of all the spiders and snakes. So Dad went on his own. It was difficult being without him but Mum and I got through it. We had fun actually.

It was in the summer so we visited various places locally – the beach, the aquarium and some other places too.

“Dad,” I say. “Why don’t we go to Grandad’s favourite place today?”

“Why should we?” mutters Dad bluntly.

“To remember him. Remember all the good times we had with him. We can even plant a tree or something there as well if you want.”

Mum looks over at me and smiles, a tear falling from her eye.

“That’s a beautiful idea,” cries Mum, wiping her tears.

“Maybe,” says Dad. “Depends if I’m in the mood.”

I look up at Mum who frowns at Dad. “Come on Fred,” says Mum. “It might be good for you.”

Dad stands up. “How do you know what’s good for me?!” screams Dad. “Neither of you know anything so leave me alone!”

He storms out of the kitchen. “Where are you going?” cries Mum.

“Out!” yells Dad. “And don’t follow me either!”

He slams the front door. I hear the car engine start and eventually, it fades into the distance.

“It’s the grief talking,” Mum tells me. “He’ll come back when he’s ready.”

I stare at the door, frowning before I tuck into my pancakes again.

~

I sit on the sofa next to Mum. She’s showing me a photo album of when I was little. “Look,” she says, pointing to one photo. “Here’s your Grandad. Gosh, doesn’t he look different?”

I smile. “Yeah he does,” I reply. Mum keeps flicking through the album.

“If he was still here in person,” states Mum. “He’d be proud of whatever you achieve in your life.”

“Would he really?”

“Yes.”

Hearing Mum say that makes my day. She has never really said anything like that to me before.

Mainly because she has been too busy abusing Dad and hating on us rather than supporting us and giving us the respect and treatment we deserve. “Dad’s been gone ages,” I say. “When will he come home?”

Suddenly, the doorbell rings. “You’re not expecting anyone are you?” Mum asks me.

“No,” I reply. Mum gets up and looks through the blinds. “It’s the police,” says Mum, worriedly.

Mum goes to the front door and opens it. “Mrs. Harding?” says one of the police officers.

“Yes that’s me,” says Mum.

“I’m DC Mayhew and this is DC Matthews. May we come in? We need to speak to you.”

“Of course.”

I look round to see two police officers enter the living room followed by Mum. “Is this your son?” one of them asks.

“Yes,” says Mum. “He’s off school due to a family bereavement.”

“I’m afraid we have some bad news for you,” says one of the officers, the one I believe is DC Mayhew. “You may want to sit down.”

Mum sits down next to me. “At approximately quarter-to-one this afternoon, there was an accident on the B-Road into Cosham,” explains DC Mayhew.

“Right?” asks Mum.

“One of the identified casualties is a man we believe to be your husband, Fred Harding?”

Mum face drops. “Oh my…” she says, crying.

“He has been taken into hospital and that is all we know. However when he is more stable, we will need to ask him a few questions.”

Mum shakes her head. “It can’t be him,” she cries. I move closer to Mum. “It’s okay,” I say. “At least we know he’s alive and getting treated.”

Mum nods. “But what if he dies?” she says.

“Don’t think like that.”

DC Mayhew and DC Matthews walk towards the door. “We are very sorry to have to break this to you,” says DC Mayhew. “We’ll show ourselves out.”

Mum and I hug on the sofa as the officers leave. “What are we going to do?” cries Mum.

Chapter 16

Beep, beep!

The taxi is outside the house, waiting for us to come out. “Come on,” I shout from the bottom of the stairs. “The taxi’s here!”

Mum rushes down the stairs. “This is all our fault, Ben!” cries Mum. “If we hadn’t pressured him, he wouldn’t have even left the house!”

“No one is to blame,” I tell her. “Well, unless someone crashed into Dad then yeah, they’re to blame. But it isn’t our fault.”

I can tell that Mum isn’t convinced by my words. But what can I do? Mum’s emotions and thoughts compared to mine are completely different. She likes to overthink and be negative. I like to under-think and be positive.

Even through the toughest of times, I still try to see the positives. Yes, I’m weird like that. Deal with it.

We leave the house and make our way over to the taxi.

“QA Hospital is it, love?” asks the taxi driver.

“Yes please,” replies Mum. The taxi driver drives off down the road and takes us on route to QA Hospital.

~

“Look at him,” whispers Mum. “What a mess.”

I look through the small window into Resus. “He looks terrible,” I say. “But he’s in the best place.”

Mum walks over to the row of seats and breaks down into tears. “If he dies,” she says. “I don’t know what I’ll do. I regret everything I’ve ever done to him.”

I don’t really know what to do. I can’t really say anything that I’ve already said. It won’t be the same. “He’ll pull through,” I tell her. “He won’t leave us. Not like this.”

Mum shakes her head. “But what if he doesn’t pull through?” she cries. “What will we do?”

“Stop thinking like that!” I say. “We need to stay positive. But if the worst does happen, we’ll cross that bridge when it comes to it.”

Mum obviously still isn’t convinced by my words as she stands up again and walks back over to Resus.

I follow her. I don’t want to leave her on her own.

“Stop looking in,” I whisper. “It will make you feel even worse.”

“He’s my husband. I want to keep checking on him.”

“And he’s my dad. But I don’t want to keep looking in as it will only make me feel worse. Come to the relative’s room. I’ll get us some coffees.”

Mum agrees and we go to the relative’s room. “You stay here. I’ll go to the shop,” I tell her. “I’ll be back in a minute.”

It has suddenly struck me that I’m being extremely grown up for my age. Usually, a lad my age wouldn’t really be this grown up – especially the lads at my school anyway. They think they’re so cool and the ‘big men’. Then there’s me and some other lads who are quieter and actually know how to behave properly.

“Can I have one coffee and one hot chocolate please?” I say to the lady at the shop counter.

“Any sugar in the coffee?” she asks.

“Two please.”

She makes the drinks up and I give her the money. “Thanks,” I say. I make my way back to the relative’s room but Mum has disappeared. “For goodness’ sake!” I cry.

~

Dad is awake. “I’m sorry,” he says.

“What for?” Mum says, holding his hand.

“For scaring you like this. I didn’t cause the crash though, I promise. Some idiot on the B-Road kept swerving in between cars. But he misjudged his distance between his car and mine and he went into the front of me.”

“What happened afterwards?” I ask.

“I span around and then a van crashed into the side of me causing my car to flip.”

Mum looks completely shocked. He’s lucky to be alive really. Whenever I hear on the news that something like this has happened, the casualties are either seriously injured or dead.

“The police said they wanted to ask you a few questions when you woke up,” says Mum. “But they’re not here yet. The hospital called them earlier.”

“Okay,” replies Dad. “Not sure if I’m able to answer questions under the stress of police.”

Mum smiles. “You’ll be fine,” she says.

Wow, I’m shook. Mum is actually supporting Dad. There isn’t any of that ‘man-up and stop being scared’ rubbish or any of that ‘men should be brave’ rubbish either. “I’m just going to the toilet,” I say, getting up.

“Alright love,” says Mum.

I leave Resus and head to the toilet. On my way, I spot the police walking in the direction of Resus, obviously wanting to speak to my dad. “Excuse me?” I say. “Are you here to question my father, Fred Harding?”

“We are,” says DC Mayhew. I remember him from earlier.

“Would it be possible for you to come back tomorrow? He’s tired and drowsy from all the medication he’s been given.”

DC Mayhew looks at his female colleague, who wasn’t at the house earlier on. “Of course,” says DC Mayhew. “Let him know we wish him a full recovery.”

I smile. “Will do.”

They leave and I sigh with relief. I don’t want Dad feeling under any pressure by the police.

Hopefully he’ll be glad that I did this for him.

~

Mum and I are back home now. “See?” I say. “I told you he’d be okay.”

“Yeah,” replies Mum. “And what you did today with the police was very kind and thoughtful.”

“Well I didn’t want him to be under any pressure. Not today anyway.”

Mum smiles. “Well you better get off to bed,” she says. “We’ll be going back to the hospital tomorrow.”

“Okay,” I say. “Night Mum.”

“Oh, Ben?”

I turn around.

“I’m sorry you’re not getting a chance to grieve for your grandfather. Stupid drivers on the road, at?”

“Yeah.”

I go back upstairs and close my bedroom door. Rex is fast asleep on my bed. I smile at him. I get changed and climb into bed. Rex jumps off and goes into his bed.

Closing my eyes, I begin to hear noises. Noises I’ve never heard. They’re the sounds of screaming and crashes. Oh no. I’m starting to get the feeling of what it would have been like for Dad in that crash. “Stop!” I yell.

Chapter 17

I hear tingling noises. I open my eyes and see that my room is full of blue smoke – again. My bedroom door has gone – again – and now I’m being dragged over to it. I walk through and suddenly, everything stops.

Everything is black. I start to come around and I wake up. I’m on my bedroom floor. I sit up and see myself stood at the bedroom door. Mum and Dad are arguing. This is when I realize when this is. This is the first time Mum and Dad broke up for a bit when I was 11 years old.

Obviously being quite young then, I didn’t fully understand what was happening and where Dad had gone for a few weeks. “You’re pathetic!” screams Mum. “How you can ever call yourself a man I do not know!”

That’s when I hear a slap. “Aggghhhhh!” screams Mum. Dad has hit Mum. She had it coming. But I don’t believe in violence.

So I am shocked that Dad had to result to that. “Don’t you ever hit me again!” she shouts.

“Well don’t talk to me like I’m something you’ve just stepped in!” roars Dad.

I can’t remember Dad ever being this angry before. I don’t even remember him being this angry when this happened for real. I see their bedroom door open. I quickly close my door slightly, leaving a small gap for me to continue listening and watching. “That’s it!” shouts Mum. “Walk away!”

“Will you keep your voice down?” whispers Dad angrily. “Ben will hear you!”

“I don’t care! At least he’ll know what kind of man you are!”

“Well then he’ll know what kind you woman you are as well!”

Mum stares at Dad angrily. I can tell she wants to hit him. She braces. I can see it in her face; and her hands.

“That’s it!” she screams. She lunges towards Dad and starts attacking him. “Get off me!” he cries. “Get off!”

I run out of my bedroom. “Mum!” I cry. “Stop it! Stop it right now!”

She carries on. “STOP!” I roar as loud as I can. Wow! I never knew I had that in me. Mum stops and looks at me.

“Go back to bed, Ben,” she says.

“No! Not until you stop attacking Dad. Do you think it’s big and cool to hit people?”

“He hit me first!”

“I don’t care! Just walk away from it then! Don’t hit him back!”

“Well I just did so…”

“You’re acting like a child, Mum!”

She stares at Dad, who is quivering in a corner. Mum has clearly scared Dad quite badly. “Dad you should go,” I say. “Get away from this mad woman.”

“Get your things then,” he says.

“What? I don’t need to go anywhere.”

“You just called your mother mad for attacking me.”

“It isn’t as if she’s going to attack me though, is it?”

Dad looks at Mum. “He’s right,” says Mum. “I wouldn’t hurt him.”

“I’m not taking that risk. If you can hurt me then who knows who you’ll hurt next!”

I look at Mum, not wanting to leave. “Ben!” shouts Dad. “Get your things.”

Dad grabs his car keys and opens the front door. There, he sees our neighbours. “What’s going on?” says Emily.

“None of your business, you nosey old mare!” snaps Dad.

“I beg your pardon? Helen, are you alright?”

“Are you serious? I’m battered. Black and blue. And you’re asking if she’s alright?”

“Well you must have done or said something to make her do this!”

“Oh you’re sick! If I had done this to her, you’d be straight to that police station!”

“Yes, I would. What’s your point?”

I stand next to Dad. “My point is, is that what makes it any different that she’s attacked me?” he says.

“You’re a man. You can take it!”

“Sexist,” I input. “Just because he’s a man, it doesn’t excuse a woman hitting him.”

Emily walks off. She clearly wants to get one over on Dad but it isn’t working. “You won’t hear the end of this!” she calls as she enters her house next door.

Dad looks at me. “Come on Ben,” he says. “These women aren’t worth our time.”

We get into the car. I’m fed up of hearing all these stereotypes. And so is Dad. “Where are we going?” I ask him.

“We’re going to stay at Max’s tonight,” says Dad. “He knows what it’s like to be around abusive women.”

“Really? Who abused him?”

“You probably won’t remember her but he had a wife. You must have been about three years old when they got married. He loved her to bits. He treated her nicely, bought her nice things. But the she threw it back in his face.”

“How do you mean?”

I’m really intrigued in Uncle Max’s life. I do feel sorry for him.

“One day, he didn’t buy her a necklace she really wanted. He just couldn’t afford it at the time. They were saving up for a trip to America. Because he said ‘no’, she snapped. She attacked him. She shouted at him. This would happen every day,” explained Dad.

“It got to the point where he had to report it. But the police didn’t believe him purely because he’s a man. He was quizzed about it. The police turned it on him – you know, like they always do. So he filed for a divorce.”

I’m shocked. Why did this happen to Uncle Max? He’s such a kind, gentle man. He wouldn’t do anything to hurt anyone. He didn’t deserve this. “That’s awful!” I say. “Where is she now?”

Dad pauses for a moment. “God knows,” he says. “Prison hopefully. Rats like her belong there.”

I giggle. “So you’re saying Mum is a rat who belongs there?”

“Yes, I am.”

We arrive at Uncle Max’s. “Fred!” cries Uncle Max. “What on Earth happened to you?”

Dad awkwardly smiles. “Helen attacked me,” says Dad.

“Oh I’m so sorry.”

Uncle Max does sound very sympathetic. But it has happened to him before so he can’t exactly laugh about it. “Can we stay here for a while?” asks Dad.

“Of course. You stay for as long as you need.”

We go into the house and sit in the living room. “You go up to bed, Ben,” says Dad. “I need to talk to Max alone.”

“The spare room is already set up from when Jessie stayed round last week,” Uncle Max tells me. “I’ll put some clean sheets on the beds tomorrow.”

I go upstairs and make my way to the spare room. But I don’t want to miss out on the conversation going on downstairs. I sit on the top step and listen.

“I don’t know if I can do this anymore,” says Dad. “It’s getting too much for me and she’s putting Ben in danger.”

“Maybe you should speak to someone. A marriage counsellor?” suggests Uncle Max.

“That won’t work. She’ll just pin it on me and we won’t get anywhere.”

“Go to the police?”

“What? And go through the same as what you did? I don’t think so.”

I feel bad for listening. But I just want to know how Dad is going to handle this situation. How it is going to get sorted. I want them to make things up. But at the same time, Dad doesn’t deserve the bad treatment he’s getting. Mum needs to sort herself out. Otherwise she is going to break up our family.

~

“You okay?” Dad asks as he comes into the room.

“Yeah I’m fine,” I say. “Just upset that Mum is causing all this trouble over nothing!”

“She’ll get what’s coming to her.”

Dad gets into his bed on the other side of the room. “Don’t worry about it though,” he says. “You get some sleep. You’ve got school tomorrow.”

I close my eyes and slowly drift off to sleep.

~

I struggle to catch my breath as I wake up. It’s happened again. I’ve relived my past. And this time, it wasn’t a nice one. “Why is this happening to me?” I whisper.

Chapter 18

“Morning,” says Mum. “We’re going to the hospital at lunchtime.”

“Okay,” I say. I sit down at the kitchen table and pour myself a glass of orange juice from the jug sat in the middle of the table. The police want to speak to Dad today about his accident so Mum wants to be there when they come just in case Dad gets himself worked up about it.

“Dad will be home soon though, won’t he?” I ask.

“Of course he will,” replies Mum. “As long as the doctors and nurses look after him properly.”

~

The taxi sits outside waiting for us to approach. When we get to the taxi, Mum tells the driver our destination and then we get going.

“How are you today, love?” the taxi driver asks Mum.

“Yes I’m fine thank you,” replies Mum. “And you?”

“Yeah I’m good.”

The journey is quite awkward for me. Mum and the taxi driver are deep in conversation and I’m just sat here, not really knowing what to do. On the one hand, I could get involved in the conversation. But on the other hand, I’d rather keep myself to myself.

We turn a corner and we find ourselves in the hospital car park. “That will be £18.45 please, love,” says the taxi driver. Mum hands the money over and then we get out.

I look over to my right and see a police car parked in the distance. The police must be here for Dad.

~

“Hiya love,” says Dad, seeing Mum. “Hi Son.”

We sit down on the seats, either side of the bed. “Have the police been yet?” asks Mum.

“No, not yet,” says Dad. “I’ve been waiting all morning for them.”

“I saw a police car outside,” I pipe in.

“Oh that probably isn’t for me. The doctor giving me medication this morning had to rush off. A man had been stabbed.”

Mum opens her mouth in shock. “Oh my!” she says.

“Yeah,” replies Dad. “But the police might be here for me. I don’t know though.”

Mum smiles. “When you get out of here, I have a surprise for you,” says Mum. A surprise? What surprise? I haven’t been told of any surprise. It better be a good one if she is waiting to tell him when he gets out of hospital.

“Tell me now,” insists Dad.

“No, no. Wait until you get home.”

“That might not be for a while! Tell me now.”

Mum looks at me and smirks. “Well after everything you’ve been through,” begins Mum. “I think we should look towards the future. Our family. So…I think we should have another baby!”

I look at Mum with a shocked face. “Excuse me?!” I exclaim.

Mum smiles, hopeful. Dad has no words. He just looks at me. Then looks back at Mum.

“Is that what you really want?” whispers Dad.

“Yes,” says Mum, beginning to cry with happy tears.

“Hasn’t what happened last time put you off having more children?”

“We mustn’t dwell on the past. We need to look forwards.”

I have no words. Why does Mum want another baby? I’m fine as an only child. I don’t need some rat running around the place causing trouble and annoying me!

“No!” I shout. “I don’t want a brother or sister!”

“You did last time,” says Mum.

“I was younger then. I’m older now.”

“So what? You’re never too old for siblings.”

“I don’t care!”

I stand up and storm off. “Ben!” shouts Mum. I ignore her. How could she do this? Trying to make plans without even consulting me! She’s going back to her selfish, self-obsessed ways again! Why another child? Just get another dog!

I’m sure Rex would much rather have a little friend then I do a sibling!

Mum comes after me. “Wait,” she says. “This isn’t about you Ben!”

I turn round. “Yes it is about me!” I cry. “Because if you have another child, you’ll want it to share a room with me. It’ll be annoying. You’ll expect me to babysit all the time!”

I can see Mum is trying really hard to say something but nothing comes out. “See?” I say. “You know it is about me just as much as it’s about you.”

“But it’s a new life, Ben,” says Mum. “Just think when you’re older and have kids…”

“Who says I want kids?”

“Okay…if you have kids, you’ll want everyone to be happy for you. So why can’t you be happy for me and your father if we go ahead?”

“Because I’d have to live with a snotty, crying, annoying, troublemaking rat for at least another eight years of my life!”

I walk off again. I don’t look behind me.

In some ways, I regret shouting. I regret telling Mum and Dad that they can’t have another baby. It’s just that…well, I don’t know really. Maybe Mum’s selfish ways are rubbing off on me and I’m only thinking about myself here. If Mum and Dad really want a baby, then who am I to stop them? They’ll be the parents and I’ll be the older brother. I won’t have to do all the horrible things.

Maybe I should apologize. Or maybe I should hold it back for now so I don’t look like a complete pushover.

~

“I’m sorry,” I say.

“It’s okay,” says Mum, wiping her eyes.

“Look son, I know it’s a shock. I’m shocked too. But we’ve spoken about it and we’ve agreed we’ll only try if you’re happy with it,” Dad tells me.

“You should try,” I announce. “Who am I to stop you, ay? I’m going to be a brother!”

Mum and Dad smile. “Are you sure?” says Mum.

“Yeah. Why not?”

Mum hugs Dad. “We’re going to have a baby!” chants Mum. I smile awkwardly. It isn’t what I totally want. But hey, it isn’t every day you get to be an older brother. At least I’ll have someone to order around and get into trouble!

Chapter 19

“Right, we’ll see you tomorrow,” says Mum, kissing Dad on the forehead.

I hug Dad and then we leave. Dad got his diagnosis earlier. He’s got a few fractured ribs and a few bruised bones. “You’ll need plenty of rest,” the doctor told him. “And don’t do anything to strenuous that can damage your ribs even more.”

Mum and Dad agreed that they’ll wait until Dad is 100% better before trying for another baby. “I really am sorry,” I say again, as me and Mum wait outside the hospital for our taxi home. “I guess I was just shocked.”

“It’s fine,” says Mum. “At least we know you’re happy for us and you’re looking forward to having a brother or sister.”

“Well, I’m not so sure about the last part. Can you try for a goat instead?” I joke.

Mum laughs. “Not sure that’s biologically possible,” says Mum.

Our taxi arrives and we get in. “32 Willow Street,” says Mum.

“Right you are,” says the taxi driver. We leave the car park and make our way home.

~

It is only three o’clock in the afternoon when we get home. “What’s for dinner tonight?” I ask.

“What do you want for dinner?” says Mum.

“Fish and chips?”

Mum looks at me for a moment before smiling. “Go on then,” she says. “We can treat ourselves.”

The nearest fish and chip shop is in the village which is a ten minute walk from the house.

I told Mum I would go and get it and she can sit at home and relax. Then, I have an idea. “Actually,” I say. “Maybe we could go and spend the evening with Grandma. Make sure she’s okay.”

Mum smiles at my kind gesture. “She’d like that,” she says. “It’s a deal. We’ll go to Pat’s. We can cook her dinner.”

I haven’t seen Grandma since we heard that Grandad had passed away.

I’m not even sure she knows about Dad’s accident.

So today would be a good time to tell her; although with the stress she’s under, this could send her over the edge.

“Should we tell her about Dad?” I ask.

“Well she is his mother,” says Mum. “She does have a right to know.”

“But she might not be able to take all the tragedy much more. First Grandad passes and now Dad was at death’s door only yesterday!”

“That’s true. But she might want to see him. We need to tell her.”

I nod. There isn’t much I can do in terms of helping Grandma. But I can tell Dad any messages she may want to give him if she isn’t up to visiting him in hospital.

“What time should we go round?” asks Mum.

“Five?” I suggest. “That way, we have time to relax after today before we go.”

“Okay.”

I sit down on the sofa and Rex jumps up on me. “Hey Rex,” I say. “Have you been a good boy?”

He wags his tail at the words ‘good boy’. He snuggles into me and goes to sleep. I’ve noticed that Rex has been sleeping a lot recently. It is definitely out of character for him. “Mum,” I say. “Should I be worrying about the fact that Rex has been sleeping a lot recently?”

“Hmmm…” murmurs Mum. “It can be a worrying sign. I’ll phone the vet and see what they say.”

I smile, looking down at Rex. I hope it isn’t anything too worrying.

~

“Hiya love,” Grandma says to me. “Hi Helen.”

She invites us into the house and we sit down in the living room. “What do I owe the pleasure?” she asks.

“Oh we just came round to see how you were doing Grandma,” I say. “And we wanted to cook you dinner.”

“Oh that’s very kind, dear. I’ve been alright. Tired and stressed, but that’s because I’m on my own now. Anyway, where’s Fred?”

“That’s something else we wanted to talk to you about,” says Mum.

“Oh he ain’t dead as well is he?”

“No, no,” laughs Mum. “He was in an accident yesterday. But he is fine now. A few broken ribs. Nothing major.”

“Silly man!”

The three of us sit in the living room for a while. I look over at the chair in the corner. Grandad always used to sit there and if anyone else sat there, he’d poke us with his walking stick. “Oi, get off,” he would say. “That’s my seat.”

We’d all laugh but whoever was sat there would move. Most of the time, Dad would be sat there just to annoy Grandad. Times were fun. And now it’s the end of an era. But it’s the start of a new one. “What were you thinking of cooking then?” asks Grandma.

“We hadn’t really thought about that,” I say. “What do you like?”

“Oh well I like shepherd’s pie. Just without onions…they make me gassy.”

I laugh. Even with Grandad gone, Grandma still has her sense of humor. “Shepherd’s pie it is,” I say.

“I don’t have any mince though. So you may have to pop into Tesco Express down the road.”

I stand up. “Mum,” I say. “Can I have a fiver for mince please?”

Mum hands me a £5 note and I leave Grandma’s house to go to the shop.

As I walk down the road, I bump into Kai. “Hi Ben,” he says.

“Alright?” I reply.

“Where you been at school these past few days?”

“My Grandad passed away two days ago and my dad was involved in an accident yesterday.”

“Oh my God. I am so sorry to hear that, Ben. Are you okay?”

“I’m fine. I’m looking after my Mum. She’s a bit stressed about Dad and Dad is stressed about Grandma. He’s struggling to cope with his grief I think.”

“If there’s anything you need, give me a call. Anyway I best get home. See you around.”

“See ya!”

I carry on walking down the road and I eventually arrive at the shop.

~

“It should be ready in about half an hour,” I say. I’m quite impressed with myself. I’ve cooked a whole dinner by myself. Although I did get Mum to make sure that it was all ready to go into the oven before I put it in.

“Sounds great,” says Grandma. “You are a good boy.”

I smile. Grandma has always said that to me. It’s just a typical grandmother thing to say to their grandson isn’t it?

“So has Fred told you how his accident happened?” asks Grandma.

“He said that some idiot was drifting in between cars on the B-Road into Cosham. But the idiot driver misjudged his distance between his and Fred’s car and smashed straight into the side of him. And then a van smashed into him as well causing his car to flip,” explains Mum.

“If you ask me, people who drive like that should be banned from the roads for good. Not just given a fine.”

Grandma nods and hums. “That’s why I don’t drive,” she says. “I don’t want some idiot crashing into me.”

I don’t really know what to add to the conversation. But I don’t want to change the subject because that would just seem rude. “How’s school?” asks Grandma. Oh okay, Grandma has changed the subject. No need for me to do it.

“Yeah it’s going good,” I say. “Obviously I haven’t been in for a few days because of Grandad but I think I’ll be ready to go back next week.”

If I’m honest, I’m ready to go back now. I can’t exactly grieve for Grandad whilst I’m looking after Mum who is stressing and worrying about Dad.

“What about your grades?” she asks.

“They’re alright. Science is down a bit but that’s because my teacher never teaches us. She just gives us a PowerPoint, she reads off of it, tells us to copy everything on the board and then gives us paper to make revision posters!”

“So no information actually goes in then?”

“Not really.”

“I’ve never told anyone this but I studied science at university a few years before I had your father. I didn’t complete it because I fell pregnant but I was quite the science nerd,” Grandma tells me.

“Really? I didn’t know that,” interrupts Mum.

“Well, like I said…I never really told anyone.”

~

“That was delicious,” says Grandma. “You can’t beat a bit of shepherd’s pie.”

“Yes,” says Mum. “It was very nice. Thank you Ben.”

“That’s alright,” I say. “It’s nice to be able to cook dinner for once.”

“Oh, you’ll be doing it more often at home then?” laughs Mum.

“If you want me to. I did do very well in food technology last year.”

Mum smiles. “I’m only joking.”

Grandma sits back into her chair. “You alright, Pat?” asks Mum.

“Yes dear, I’m fine. Just a bit tired,” says Grandma, tiredly. Mum looks at me, suspicious of Grandma’s sudden feeling of tiredness.

I look back, confused at her suspicion. “Right, shall we stay for another half hour or so and then make a move?” Mum asks me.

“Yes, sounds good,” I say. “I want to check on Rex and make sure he’s alright.”

“Oh what’s wrong with the little mite?” asks Grandma.

“He just seems to be sleeping a lot. More than usual. So I’m a bit worried.”

“Bless him. You should get him to the vet.”

“Mum said she’d phone the vet later.”

Grandma sits back again and closes her eyes.

“You two get off,” she says. “I’m a bit tired. I’ll give you a call in the morning so we can go see Fred.”

“Alright Pat,” says Mum. “See you tomorrow.”

Mum holds Grandma’s hand for a brief moment and then leaves. “Bye Grandma,” I say, kissing her on the cheek. Me and Mum step out of Grandma’s house and close the door behind us. “Something’s not right,” says Mum.

“With Grandma?” I ask.

“Yeah. She suddenly has the urge to sleep. She was fine earlier.”

“Maybe she got bored of us.”

“It isn’t funny Ben! When we go to the hospital tomorrow, I’ll ask a doctor to see her.”

Mum is really worried about Grandma and she isn’t even Mum’s real mum – she’s her mother-in-law. “Right come on,” says Mum. “Let’s go home.”

Chapter 20

We arrive home at about half past seven. “What shall we do?” asks Mum.

“I don’t know,” I say. “Maybe just sit down and watch telly?”

Mum smiles for a moment. “You pick a good film from the DVD rack,” she tells me. “We can snuggle on the sofa and watch a film.”

I go over to the DVD rack and browse the hundreds of DVDs we have slotted in the rack. “Not a soppy film!” calls Mum. “I hate them!”

I laugh. “Don’t worry, I wasn’t going to pick one anyway.”

I browse some more and I finally see one. “What about Pirates of the Caribbean?” I suggest.

“Yeah, go on then,” says Mum. I walk over to the TV and put the DVD in the player.

“Go get a blanket from the airing cupboard,” says Mum. “I’ll set the DVD up when the screen loads.”

“Okay,” I say.

~

I’m in bed now. It is half past ten and Rex is snuggled up next to me. Mum called the vet during one of the boring scenes in the film and we’ve got an appointment next Monday. I hope it isn’t anything bad. Hopefully he’s just being lazy or something because I can cope with that. If he’s ill, I won’t be able to. I peer over at his bed and I see him curled up, snoring away peacefully. I smile. He is probably the best pet I’ve ever had. But he’s a dog. Who doesn’t love dogs?

I lay back down again and stare at the ceiling. I just can’t seem to sleep. My bed is really uncomfortable tonight. I groan. I groan some more as I toss and turn in bed, trying to get myself into a comfortable position to fall asleep in.

It doesn’t really work. I just can’t sleep! And it happens every single night! Maybe I should talk to Mum about it tomorrow and ask her to take me to the doctors to see if they can help me.

~

It’s 23:56pm and I’m still wide awake.

Rex is still snoring away next to me in his bed. I don’t snore but right now, I wish I was peacefully snoring. At least I’d be asleep then!

Minutes pass. And suddenly, my blue stone starts flashing. So that’s it then. I know that it is the stone for sure that is causing all these flashbacks and making me relive my life again. I suppose it isn’t too bad.

But it does keep me awake even longer at night. My bedroom window fades into a blue portal. “Here we go again,” I say. I slowly walk towards my window and climb through. I fall deep into the portal and everything then goes black.

I open my eyes and look around me. It’s my thirteenth birthday. Oh this was a day I certainly did not want to remember.

“Happy birthday to you,” sing Mum and Dad. “Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to Ben, happy birthday to you!”

I smile cheerfully as I sit up in bed and look at Mum and Dad. It is seven o’clock in the morning. Luckily for me, it’s a weekend so I don’t have to go to school.

“Come on!” says Dad. “Get out of bed and come downstairs.”

I climb out of bed and make my way downstairs. The living room is covered in banners, balloons and presents. There is even a table at the back for the food and drinks later for my party. I’ve invited all my closest friends and then there is my Uncle Max, Grandad and Grandma. My other family members can’t make it, sadly. But I’m sure it’ll be just as fun. “Come on then,” says Mum excitedly. “Open your presents.”

Dad smiles. “Give the boy a chance, Helen,” he says. “He’s just woken up.”

“I’m going to start with the cards,” I say.

I always find it respectful to open cards first and open presents after. I don’t know why I think that way – I just do. “Okay,” says Mum. “Whatever you choose.”

I pick up the cards on the table. One is obviously from Mum and Dad, and then there are a few more. I believe one of them might be from my cousin Louie, who is Uncle Max’s son, from his ex-wife, Katy.

I never hear from Katy anymore – thank God – but I still hear from Louie.

He’s the only cousin I hear from now. I’ve never gotten a letter or a card from my cousins who live in Australia.

I open my first card. It’s got a monkey on the front. I open it and it is from Louie! “It’s from Louie,” I say.

“Aw,” says Mum. “I’m glad you two keep in contact. Even if his mother is a complete psycho.”

I look at Dad who is looking at me. We both know exactly what each other is thinking. I open the next one. The word ‘Son’ on the front gives away to me that it is from Mum and Dad. I open it up and a £10 note falls out. “Thank you,” I say.

“That’s alright,” say both Mum and Dad at the same time. They’re the only two cards I’ve got at the moment. But I don’t care because I’ll probably get more later. I move onto the presents.

There are four presents. Three of which are quite big. The fourth one is a bit smaller. Probably a box of chocolates.

I start with the bigger ones, presumably from Mum and Dad. The first present is a skateboard. I’ve wanted a skateboard for a while now but could never afford it. So I am glad I’ve finally got one. “Thank you!” I cheer.

I place the box to one side and lift up the next one. It’s a little bit smaller but still has a bit of weight to it.

“I wonder what this is,” I say. I unwrap it and smile at its contents. It’s a controller for my Xbox. “Thank you,” I say.

Again, I place it to one side and open the next one. This one is the smaller one which I think is from Louie. I look at the tag and I’m correct. I unwrap it and smile. Obviously it isn’t as good as my other two so far but it’s the thought that counts. It’s a box of Cadbury’s chocolate.

“Delicious,” says Mum, licking her lips. I laugh. “These are mine,” I giggle. “I’m only joking. I will share.”

Mum and Dad laugh. I put the box of chocolates on top of the skateboard box and bring the fourth and final present over to my lap. Again, it is shaped like a box and is quite heavy. I slowly peel open the wrapping paper and jump for joy when I see what it is. “Oh my days, you didn’t!” I cry. “Oh my God, thank you so much!”

It is a Canon EOS 500d DSLR. I’ve wanted one for years but have never been able to afford it. I have tried saving but to this day, I only have about £48 saved. Nowhere near enough!

So Mum and Dad have obviously been saving for a good few months then to be able to afford this camera for me. “We knew you’ve wanted one for ages,” says Dad. “And you better look after it!”

“Don’t worry,” I say. “I will look after it.”

I don’t want to put the box on the floor with the others – it is too valuable. “I’m going to put this in my room,” I say, standing up and walking towards the stairs.

“Alright,” calls Mum as I make my way upstairs. “Don’t go back to sleep though!”

Don’t go back to sleep? It’s quarter past seven in the morning! Of course I want sleep. I wasn’t expecting to get up until at least half past nine.

But I don’t want to disobey Mum so I place the camera box on my bed and go back downstairs. I’ll need to buy myself a camera bag though as I haven’t got one today. But never mind. As I reach the bottom of the stairs, another card comes through the letterbox. “I’ve got another card,” I say, entering the living room.

“Who’s it from?” asks Mum.

“I don’t know, I haven’t opened it yet.”

I sit down on the sofa and open the card.

“It’s from Ethan from school,” I say. “He has put a note in saying ‘sorry I can’t come today, something has come up. As an apology, here’s twenty-pounds’.”

Mum shakes her head. “I hate people who let you down last minute,” she says. “It isn’t good enough.”

“He did say something has come up,” I say. “That can’t be helped.”

“Anyone who doesn’t give you a specific reason doesn’t have a real good enough reason.”

I don’t want to argue. Not today. “Okay,” I just say.

My party isn’t for another few hours so I don’t have anything to do in the meantime. “Why don’t you try out your new camera?” asks Mum. “You’ve got plenty of time until your party.”

I debate this in my mind for a moment. “I don’t have an SD card,” I say.

“I might have one in my study somewhere,” says Dad. “I’ll have a look.”

Whilst Dad goes looking for an SD card, I go upstairs and get ready for the day. Then I take my camera out of the box and set it up.

“I found one,” says Dad. “Now, it has some old family photos on it so don’t delete them!”

“I won’t,” I say as I insert the SD card into the camera. “I’m just going to take pictures of the back garden.”

“Alright. Just don’t get any of the neighbours’ things in the background. They’ll cry about it otherwise.”

“Okay.”

I make my way into the back garden and Rex follows me. I play around with the camera settings to get different effects. “Rex!” I call. I throw a ball and capture a photo at that exact moment. It looks very good. “Good boy,” I say.

~

My party is in one hour and Mum and Dad are making some final preparations in the garden. Luckily it is a nice day today so my party can definitely happen outdoors.

“You excited?” asks Dad.

“Yes, very,” I say.

The back garden has been decked out very nicely.

We have a marquee in the shed that we use whenever we have barbecues in the summer so Dad put that up and put the food table and chairs inside it, just in case it rains. I’m also having a barbecue too but because there’s no room in the marquee, Dad has set it up on the decking by the backdoor.

“It looks great,” I say. I walk over to the fence going around the garden and look at all the banners and bunting. “Wow!” I gleam. “I love it.”

“I’m glad you do,” says Dad. “It took us all morning!”

I laugh. I go into the kitchen and take out two plates of food for the marquee. They’re wrapped in tinfoil so they won’t go stale whilst outside.

“Can’t wait to eat all these sausage rolls,” I laugh. “They’re my favourite party food.”

“There’s still some in the fridge if you want some now,” says Mum. “I think I got too many.”

I don’t really fancy eating party food right this second but I will definitely eat them as soon as my party starts. Seeing my family and friends at my house is quite thrilling. I get to spend time with my family having fun – which I hardly ever do – and I get to spend time with my friends outside of the school environment – which again, I hardly ever do. So I am extremely looking forward to it.

I go back inside where Rex is whining at the door.

“What is it, boy?” I say. I look out the little window on the door and someone is stood there. I open the door. “Alright, mate?” says Uncle Max.

“Hi!” I cheer. “Come in!”

“Happy birthday.”

Uncle Max hands me a card and present. “Thank you!” I gleam. I take him through to the living room. “The party is going to be outdoors in the marquee,” I tell him. “There aren’t any alcoholic drinks by the way.”

“What you trying to say?” laughs Uncle Max. We laugh as I open the card and present. The present is a jigsaw puzzle.

I’m not into jigsaws but I often do them if I’m bored.

“Thank you,” I say.

“I don’t really know what you like,” explains Uncle Max. “Do you like puzzles?”

“I often do them,” I tell him.

“That’s good. It’s an owl.”

“Yes, I can see that.”

Mum and Dad walk in and smile when they see Uncle Max. “Hiya Max,” says Mum. “How are you?”

“I’m very well thanks Helen,” replies Uncle Max. “How are you?”

“Oh I’m not too bad.”

“And how are you bruv?”

“Yeah I’m good,” says Dad. “Been busy, busy, busy this morning though trying to organize his party.”

“So I’ve heard. I can’t wait!”

~

It’s twelve o’clock and no one has arrived yet – except Uncle Max of course. “Where is everyone?” I say.

“Give them a chance,” says Mum. “It’s only just turned twelve!”

“I know. I just like everyone to be on time. Otherwise it makes me feel like they won’t even come.”

“They will, don’t worry.”

Suddenly, the doorbell rings.

I open the door and am greeted by Grandma and Grandad. “Happy birthday!” they sing. I invite them in. “Thank you,” I say. Grandma hands me a card and a neatly wrapped present. I put it in the living room where I will open it later. Now that the party has started, I don’t want to open presents and cards until it is over. My party finishes at half-past two so I will still have the afternoon for cards and presents.

“Mum, Dad and Uncle Max are in the garden,” I tell them. “You can go out and join them if you want.”

Grandma and Grandad walk through the kitchen and out into the garden. “Oh wow,” says Grandad. “You’ve done a great job for him.”

“Hi Mum,” says Dad, standing up. “Hi Dad.”

He kisses Grandma on the cheek and hugs Grandad. “Who did all this then?” asks Grandma.

“Both me and Helen did it,” says Dad. “A team effort. Ben even contributed a bit.”

Grandma looks at me. “Helping out on your own birthday?” she laughs. “You should be getting treated like a king!”

I smile, knowing Grandma is only joking and that in fact, I do not need to be treated like a king. “I’m not a king,” I say, laughing. “I’m a God.”

Mum, Dad, Uncle Max, Grandma and Grandad burst into laughter. “Got that teenage attitude started early,” jokes Grandad. “I remember when your father turned thirteen.”

“You’ve got to tell me!” I say.

“Oh please don’t Dad!” cries Dad, a little embarrassed.

Grandad smirks. “Well,” he begins. “He woke up pretty early in the morning – he was very excited. He raced downstairs and there I was…in the kitchen…standing with your grandmother. We decided to play a prank on your father.”

Grandad pauses – obviously for dramatic effect – and then carries on. “We told him that we had completely forgotten that it was his birthday,” laughs Grandad.

“It was the funniest thing! At first, he didn’t believe us but our amazing acting soon convinced him that we had really forgotten.”

Dad sits with his head in his hand, very embarrassed. “What happened next?” I asked, smiling. At that moment, the doorbell rings. “I’ll get it,” says Uncle Max.

“Well,” says Grandad. “We had a treehouse in the back garden from when he was a kid – we didn’t bother getting rid of it. Your father and your uncle Max used to go up there every now and again – either to fight or to get some peace when they’re annoyed.”

“He went in there?”

“Yes. He stayed up there all morning. But whilst he was up there, that gave us the chance to organize a huge party for him. We lived in a big house back in the day so we had the space. But anyway, we called for him to come down. The garden was decorated as well for the barbecue. We had a trampoline too…”

“Oh no,” says Mum. “You’ve got to tell what happens now!”

He eventually opened the curtains to the treehouse and opened the window. “’You forgot my birthday!’ he cried to us. ‘Why would you do that?’” says Grandad. “We told him it was just a joke and that we wanted him to have a distraction so we could organize his party. So he opened the door, and took a step out. He missed the ladder.”

“Okay Dad, you can stop now!” laughs Dad.

“He fell all the way down, but luckily he had a soft landing – the trampoline. But it was a little bouncier than we expected. He fell straight onto it, bounced right back off and landed face first into his cake!”

This is when we all break into hysterical laughter.

“Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha!” laughs Mum. “Oh my days, you silly man!”

Grandad and Grandma are in absolute hysterics. Uncle Max comes back out. “Ben,” he says. “Your friend is here.”

I turn round and it’s Kai. “Happy birthday, mate,” he says. “I put your card and present in the living room.”

“Thanks, mate,” I say. “Where’s everyone else got to?”

“Oh…um…I saw them on the way…they said that there is no way they’d be seen dead playing pass the parcel and eating jelly and ice cream with you.” Kai explains.

I look at Mum and Dad. Suddenly, everyone forgets what Grandad has just told us and they all look at me and Kai. “I’m sorry, mate,” he says.

“Don’t worry about it,” I say. “At least you’re here. At least I know who my true friends are.”

He sits down next to me. “So what have I missed?” asks Kai, trying to bring light back to the group again.

“Grandad just told us about my dad’s thirteenth birthday,” I say, grumpily. I can’t laugh about it anymore. My ‘friends’ have really angered me. Why would they do this to me? Why?!

~

I wake up scowling. Reliving that was tough. I never spoke to those ‘friends’ again after that day. I cut them out of my life completely. Kai is my only true friend now.

Chapter 21

“I’ve just had a phone call from the hospital,” says Mum. “Your father can come home today.”

“That’s great news!” I say. “Is Grandma coming to the hospital with us today then?”

“Yes. The taxi is picking her up at lunchtime and then will pick us up and we’ll go to the hospital from here.”

I sit at the kitchen table, wondering. “Mum,” I say. “At the beach a few weeks ago, I found a blue stone.”

“That’s nice, dear,” says Mum.

“It’s in my room. But I think it’s cursed or something.”

Mum laughs. “Cursed?”

“Yeah. Ever since I got it, I’ve been reliving my life. First it was my birth, then it was my first Christmas, then it was the first time you and Dad broke up, then our trip to Blackpool and last night, it was my thirteenth birthday.”

“Maybe you were just dreaming those things. Reliving old memories.”

“That’s exactly it. Reliving, not dreaming.”

Mum shakes her head. “You’re mad. Let me see the stone,” she tells me.

I take her to my room and show her the stone. “It looks like an ordinary stone to me,” she says. “Nothing cursed about it.”

“That’s what it wants you to think,” I say.

“Ben!” shouts Mum. “There is nothing cursed about this stone! Stop worrying. But if you are worried, then just get rid of it. Put it back to where it came from.”

“Okay.”

I think about putting it back for a moment. When can I do it? At what time? Does it have to go back to the beach, specifically? So many questions!

“Can we go to the beach this evening then?” I ask.

“What for?” says Mum.

“To put the stone back!”

“Alright, alright. Keep your hair on. Yes, we can go tonight if you want.”

Mum leaves my bedroom and I put the stone back on my beside table. Finally, this part of my life will be over. I can be normal again. I won’t have a lot of sleepless nights anymore. Everything can go back to how it was before I discovered this stupid stone.

~

The taxi horn beeps outside. Mum and I are already ready to go to the hospital so the driver isn’t kept waiting.

“Hiya Pat,” says Mum. “How are you today?”

“Still a little bit tired,” says Grandma. “I didn’t get much sleep last night.”

“Why is that?”

“I’ve just been thinking about Fred. And the funeral.”

Mum holds Grandma’s hand. “It’ll be okay,” she says, comfortingly.

Something tells me that it won’t be okay. Merely because when Mum said it’ll be okay, Grandma’s face dropped and she looked downwards, like she is hiding something. “Why are you looking down, Grandma?” I ask.

Grandma looks up and smiles. “Oh no reason,” she says. “My neck plays up so I like to exercise it.”

She starts circling her neck. I can tell she’s lying though. It is so obvious. And I am determined to find out what it is she is hiding.

The taxi driver looks through his mirror. “Everything okay back there?” he asks. “The elderly lady seems a bit…off.”

“A bit ‘off?’ What do you think I am? Sour milk?!” shrieks Grandma.

I smile. “She’s fine,” I tell the taxi driver.

Grandma shivers and quickly places the palm of her right hand on her side. “Are you alright?” I ask.

“I’m fine!” snaps Grandma. “Why do you keep asking me that?”

I look at Mum. “You’ve been acting very strangely lately,” says Mum. “You’ve been tired a lot more than often and now you just shivered and put a hand on your side. What’s going on?”

Grandma sighs. “I’m not telling you in here,” says Grandma. “This is private information. I’ll tell you at the hospital.”

Mum looks out of the window. “We’re almost there now anyway,” she says. “And you better tell us the truth! Then you’ll tell Fred – unless he already knows?”

“He doesn’t,” replies Grandma. “No one does.”

“Not even Norman?”

“Not even Norman.”

I’m surprised. Something is clearly wrong with Grandma and she didn’t even tell Grandad before he passed. But to be completely honest, Grandad’s passing was completely unexpected. Maybe she was building up to tell him – but never got the chance? I don’t know. But whatever it is, now is the time for Grandma to open up about it. We turn into the hospital car park and we get out of the taxi. Mum hands the driver the money and we enter the hospital. “Right,” says Mum. “Before we see Fred, we’ll go into a quiet room and you can tell us what is going on!”

We find the relatives room and luckily, it is empty. I sit down next to Mum who sits opposite Grandma. “In your own time,” begins Mum. “Tell us what’s wrong.”

Grandma takes a deep breath in.

“I went to see a doctor a few weeks ago,” says Grandma. “My bones ached. I almost collapsed at home. He did a few tests and I got the results back just a few days before Norman passed away.”

“What did they say?” I enquire.

“I’ve…I’ve…I’ve got bone cancer.”

Grandma begins to cry. Mum rushes over and gives her a hug. I don’t know what to do. “He gave me a time scale of how much time I’ve got left,” she says.

“Can’t you have chemotherapy?” asks Mum.

“No. It is terminal. It’s too late for chemo.”

I don’t want to ask this but I can tell Mum isn’t going to. “How long did he say?” I ask, holding back tears. Mum shoots me a glare but I can tell Grandma wants to tell us. She breathes deeply again. “No more than a couple of months,” cries Grandma.

“Oh Pat,” whispers Mum. “I’m so sorry.”

I pause for a moment. “I’m going to see Dad,” I say.

“Don’t tell him about me!” cries Grandma. “I want to tell him in my own time!”

“I won’t tell him.”

I open the door, leave the room and close it behind me. First Grandad and now Grandma is slowly leaving us too.

~

As I enter Dad’s private room, I see him packing a bag. “You alright, mate?” asks Dad as he spots me.

“Yeah I’m fine,” I say. “Just happy to have you finally home.”

“Right. Well you can help me pack then. Where’s your mum?”

“In the relative’s room with Grandma.”

“What’s my mother doing here?”

“She wanted to see you.”

Dad smiles. “Well you can take me to the relative’s room and she can see me there then. I don’t think she’d want to see me in here.”

“Okay,” I say. I pass Dad his book that Mum had brought in for him yesterday. I don’t know why Mum even brought him loads of things – he’s only been here a few days!

Dad zips up the bag. “I’ll take your bag,” I say. “You can’t be carrying that weight around with you whilst your ribs are fractured.”

I take the bag from the bed and turn around. “Come on then,” says Dad. “Let’s go.”

We walk towards the relative’s room. “Fred!” cries Grandma. “Oh it is so good to see you well!”

She gets up and hugs Dad. Mum and I frown at each other. “Before we get too happy though,” says Grandma. “I’ve got something to tell you. Sit down, love.”

I sit next to Mum and Dad sits next to Grandma. Grandma takes a deep breath in and tells Dad straight. “I’ve got cancer,” she says. “And it’s terminal.”

A tear runs down Dad’s face. “I’m so sorry, love,” cries Grandma as she hugs Dad again. “I’m really sorry.”

“You’ve got nothing to be sorry about,” says Dad. “Is there any treatment you can get? Chemotherapy for example?”

“No. It’s terminal, love. It’s too late for treatment. I’m dying.”

I hug Mum as I begin to give in to the tears.

“Come on,” says Mum. “We should get home. We can talk about everything there.”

We weren’t expecting to be at the hospital for only ten minutes so it’s been a bit of a waste of journey in my opinion. But Dad’s coming home and we’ve got Grandma to focus on now. Make sure she’s comfortable when her time comes.

I don’t want her to go. Well, I do. But not in a horrible way. I want her to be at peace and not in pain. But I don’t want her to go because…well, that’s kind of obvious.

~

We’re home.

Grandma said she wanted some time on her own, no matter how much we insisted we should go back to her house with her.

So we’re now just sitting down watching TV. What is there we can do? Nothing. Absolutely nothing.

Dad can’t be active because of his ribs. Mum can’t do anything at the moment because she’s got to tend to Dad. And I can’t do anything because I get bored with everything I do. Rex is asleep so I can’t go on a walk with him. “What time do you want to go to the beach tonight?” Mum asks me.

“About six o’clock?” I say. “After dinner.”

“What are you going to the beach for?” asks Dad. “Can I come?”

“Oh he thinks this stone he found is cursed. So we’re taking it back so his theory can end. And no, you should be resting.”

“Doesn’t mean I need to be kept prisoner in my own home!”

“Dad, just stay here. We can’t have you stressing if the stone does anything to me at the beach,” I say.

“Ben, the stone is not cursed!” shouts Mum from the kitchen. “Nothing is going to happen to you!”

I scowl. I know what the stone is doing to me. Mum has no idea. But there’s no point trying to explain it.

She’ll only shrug it off.

Chapter 22

It’s almost six o’clock. I’m nervous about getting rid of the stone. I’ve gotten so used to having sleepless nights and reliving parts of my life that it is going to be odd not having those experiences anymore.

But I have to go back to school next week and I need sleep. I don’t want the stone causing me health issues if I end up getting so overly-tired that I collapse at school because of lack of sleep. The stone has to go no matter how much I argue with myself about what to do with it!

“Ben are you ready?” calls Mum from the bottom of the stairs.

“Yeah” I call back. “Just give me a minute!”

“You better not be giving that stone a heartfelt goodbye speech!”

I smile. I stare at the stone. Something inside me tells me that the stone knows what is about to happen. And I feel like the stone is watching me. But that’s impossible, right?

I pick the stone up and put it in my coat pocket. This is the last time the stone will ruin my life!

~

“We’ll be back soon,” Mum tells Dad. “Don’t be doing too much, will you?”

“Don’t worry,” says Dad. “I’ll still be in one piece when you return home.”

Mum sighs. “Right come on then,” Mum says to me. “Let’s get rid of this ‘curse’.”

I know Mum is mocking me. But right now, I couldn’t really care less. I know what this stone has been doing to me and the power it holds. But I am hoping no one else takes it home. What’s been happening to me can quite easily happen to someone else too. And knowing what it does, I don’t think I could feel any guiltier than what I might do if someone experiences their life again – especially if they’ve had a bad life. Or had things happen in their life that they do not want to remember or relive again.

Mum and I are walking to the beach. After all, it’s only a ten to fifteen minute walk away from the house.

“Once this stone has gone,” says Mum. “Will you please stop going on about stupid curses?”

“This is the first time I’ve mentioned it!” I shriek.

“But still, do you promise never to mention it again?”

“Promise.”

Our walk is a quiet one. We don’t really have a conversation like a normal mother and son would whilst going on a walk. And when we arrive at the beach, I know that this is it. This is the moment my life can go back to normal. It isn’t dark enough yet. “I think we’ll be here for a while,” I say. “The moon needs to have risen properly.”

“What’s the moon got to do with it?” asks Mum.

“Just…just watch.”

We sit on a bench for a while until the moon rises and sits in its position for the night.

“This is it,” I say.

I take the stone out of my pocket and hold it in my hand. “Oh get on with it!” snaps Mum. “I’m cold!”

I look back at Mum who doesn’t move a muscle. It’s obvious she’s just going to stay sat on the bench. “Are you staying here?” I ask.

“Um, yes.” Mum says.

I walk away from her and make my way across the stones towards the sea. The waves are quite rough this evening. They splash harshly against the rocks as if to hurt them without much success. “This is it,” I say. “This ends now! My life will go back to normal.”

As I walk further towards the sea, the waves get harsher and the stone begins to glow. I look behind me. Mum is still sat on the bench, not giving a care in the world what is happening. But then again, she’s got things on her mind.

“I am Ben Harding!” I shout. “I will not be controlled by a stone! I will not be made to live my life again whilst I’m sleeping!”

Slowly, I hold the stone up to the moon. “I am hope!” I call. “I am life! I am success! I am brave! I am…”

Suddenly, a sharp, stabbing pain rushes through me.

I cannot finish my words. “Agghhh!” I cry. The stone continues glowing as I hold it still, up to the moon. “I…I am the…”

I can’t get my words out.

The pain is too strong and overpowering. Suddenly, my body begins to spark. “Ben!” shouts Mum. “Ben what’s happening to you?!”

My body lets off small, blue sparks. “This is the end!” I shout. “The end!”

And at this very moment, the sparks come off harsher. Larger. Longer. “Agggghhhhhhh!” I scream.

“Ben!” cries Mum. “Noooooooo!”

I feel like an overpowered plug socket. “Agggghhhhh!” I scream, again.

I fall to the floor. And suddenly, all sense of sight, touch, smell, taste and hearing disappears. It’s like I’m dead.

Chapter 23

“He’s coming round,” I hear a voice say. “Ben?”

My eyelids flicker before I slowly manage to open them. I feel weak. I feel limp. I’ve got no energy left in me. What happened? “Ben?” says a man. He appears to be a doctor. “Ben, can you hear me?”

I look around, dazed and confused. Why am I in hospital? Where are my parents? I want my mum and I want my dad! I open my mouth to speak but no words come out. “He’s trying to say something,” says the doctor. “Ben, what is it?”

Gradually, I’m able to get my words out. “Where’s…where’s my…mu…mum?” I whisper, catching my breath.

“She’s just here,” replies the doctor. “And so is your dad.”

Mum and Dad slowly walk over to me. “How are you feeling?” Mum asks.

“Weak,” I say. “I can’t feel my arms.”

Mum looks at the doctor. “That’s perfectly normal for what has happened. His tests showed no suggestion of paralysis.”

Mum sighs. “Looks like you were right,” says Mum. “That stone was cursed.”

“Told you so,” I say, in pain.

Dad looks at the doctor, wanting to say something. “What happens now he’s awake?” he asks.

“Well, I want to keep him in for a few days for observations,” says the doctor. “The electric charge is still active so we need to make sure that he doesn’t come into contact with anything that could deteriorate his condition.”

“Is that why he isn’t connected up to any machines?”

“That’s correct. Any electrical impulse that enters him or if he touches anything electrical, for example, a plug socket, a phone charger or even a TV, it could shock him.”

So basically, I’ve now got to stay here until the charge leaves my body. “One of the nurses is currently looking for a wooden block. If he touches this, the wood will absorb the charge and it will gradually leave his body,” explains the doctor. “However because the charge is extremely strong, he will need to do it every day. I will explain the process when the nurse comes back.”

I feel so guilty. There’s so much stress within the family at the moment and now I’ve added more. Mum and Dad now have to take care of Grandma and me! If I hadn’t found that stone…if I hadn’t run away from home…then I wouldn’t be here right now.

Why am I so stupid? “I’m sorry,” I say.

“What for?” Mum replies.

“For this. Giving you another stressful situation to add to the list.”

“Don’t be silly. You’re our son. It’s our job as parents to be stressed about you…even if there’s nothing to be stressed about!”

I smile. I still feel bad though, no matter what Mum says.

It’s my fault. A nurse comes into the room. “Doctor Keen,” she says. “Here’s the block you asked for.”

“Thank you,” says the doctor. He comes over to me. “This is the block that will be used to absorb the electrical charge that is still present in your body,” he informs me. “Every day, you will place your hands on this block, one at a time. This will slowly reduce the amount of charge in you.”

“What happens when it’s left me?” I ask.

“We will do a few more tests, just to make sure it is all gone. Then we will slowly introduce you to electrical products again. If you get a shock, you’re still positively charged. If not, you’re negatively charged and we can discharge you within a few days of doing the tests.”

“So how many days will he be here for?” asks Dad.

“However many it takes for the charge to leave. The wood is extremely solid so it won’t absorb the charge quickly. It will gradually take the charge from Ben.”

Dad nods. “But he will be okay afterwards?”

“He should be. If anything weird happens within the time after he is discharged or if he gets shocks from even the smallest of electrical products, he must be brought back in,” the doctor insists. This sound very serious. I know I keep saying but…why did I have to be so stupid?!

~

I don’t know how long I’ve been in hospital now. Could be hours. Could be days. Could even be weeks! I decide to ask Mum. “How long have I been here for?” I say.

“Two weeks,” she tells me.

“Two weeks?!”

“Yes…the shock put you into a coma. But you just had to come round on your own…the hospital couldn’t connect you up to any machines to help you stay alive.”

“I could have died?”

Mum seems shocked by my question. “Let’s just focus on the present,” she says.

She didn’t deny what I just asked. So yes, I could have died. If I couldn’t keep myself alive, I wouldn’t be here right now. Now I’m curious about something else.

“If I’ve been here for two weeks, why didn’t the doctors just put my hands on the block rather than waiting for me to come round?” I enquire.

“Because they’re not allowed to touch you,” says Mum. “You’re actively charged.”

I sadly sigh. The stone has caused so much more trouble than I would have expected it too. Stones like this are meant to be beautiful, decorative objects. Not evil, cursed objects that put teenagers into comas!

“There’s something your father needs to tell you,” says Mum. “He’s gone to get some coffees. He’ll be back in a minute.”

“Can’t you just tell me?” I ask.

“No. It needs to be your dad.”

I’m worried now. What’s so important that it needs to be Dad that tells me and not Mum? Is it Grandma? Please don’t let it be Grandma. Dad comes in with two cups of coffee. “There you go,” he says, handing one to Mum.

“Where’s mine?” I joke. Mum and Dad laugh.

“You’re nil by mouth,” says Dad. I look at Mum and then gaze my look over to Dad.

“Mum says you have something important to tell me,” I say.

Dad looks at Mum, annoyed. “Helen,” he says. “I thought we were going to tell him when he was more up to it.”

“I am up to it. Now tell me!”

Dad looks to the floor and breathes. “Grandma passed away a few days ago,” he says.

I look at Dad, sadly.

“Please tell me you’re joking,” I choke.

“I wish I was,” says Dad. “It would be a pretty sick joke though.”

Mum puts her arm around him. “So that’s both my parents gone in a matter of weeks!” he says. I can understand why Dad is so upset. Of course it would be difficult to cope if you lost both your parents within a matter of weeks. I want to cry. But I want to stay strong. As upsetting as this is, I need to focus on my recovery. I want to be well enough to go home so I can attend the funerals. “We’ve decided to have a double funeral for them,” says Mum, on behalf of Dad. “It’s going to be a lot to organize but it’s not about us.”

I look away. Doctor Keen comes back in. He spots tension. “Is everything okay?” he asks.

“Yeah fine,” says Mum. “We just told him the news about his grandmother.”

“Oh yes, I remember you mentioned it. Very sorry for your loss,” he says. “I came in because I’ve come up with a schedule for you to do the block. Every day, you will do it at eleven o’clock in the morning and then seven o’clock in the evening,” began the doctor.

“I believe by doing it twice a day, more charge will leave you and you will hopefully have a speedier recovery.”

He brings the block of wood over to me and places it on my bed. “Obviously I can’t touch it because the charge could be transferred to me,” says Doctor Keen. “So you’ll need to place your hands, one at a time, onto the block.”

I pick the block up and hold it for a few seconds. “Okay and the next one,” says the doctor. I swap hands and now the charge is being transferred from my left hand.

“That’s it for today,” he says. “If you could place the block into this bag.”

He opens up a bag for me and I place the block in there. “I’ll need to put this in a cupboard away from anyone else,” he tells me. “It’s extremely important no one touches it except you.”

He leaves the room again. “I’m sorry we had to tell you whilst you were here, Son,” says Dad.

“It’s fine. I’m glad you told me sooner rather than later,” I say. “At least I can help with preparations when I finally get out of here.”

Mum and Dad smile. “Of course,” says Mum.

~

Being in hospital sucks. There are doctors constantly coming in and out of the room when I’m trying to sleep.

And it disturbs me. It is now Thursday morning. The doctor hasn’t been in yet for me to do the block again. It is frustrating that I have to keep doing that everyday, twice. But it’s got to be done.

I didn’t think stones could hold that much electrical power. I didn’t think they had electrical power at all to be honest. I wonder who had it before – and why they left it at the beach. Or was it the beach that made it do all those things to me? There are so many theoretical possibilities about it. I want to investigate it when I get home.

“Mum,” I say. “Do you think it will be a good idea to do a scientific experiment on the stone?”

Mum looks at me like she’s just seen a ghost. “Are you serious?” she says. “Ben, that stone put you in hospital!”

“I know but…”

“The answer is no! You don’t go anywhere near that stone again. In fact, you don’t go anywhere near that beach again. Do you hear me?”

“Yes.”

“Good.”

Chapter 24

“Good morning,” says the doctor. “Are you ready to start releasing the electrical power?” he asks.

“I certainly am,” I say. He comes over to me and puts the wooden block on my bed. “Whenever you’re ready, just pick up the block with one hand and hold it for ten seconds,” he tells me. “Then do the same with the other hand.”

I pick the block up with my right hand and hold it for ten seconds, just like the doctor said. Then I switch hands and hold the block for ten more seconds with my left hand. It is going to be an absolute pain doing this twice everyday but it’s got to be done. After all, I don’t to be a walking phone charger.

“If you could put the block into this box,” says the doctor.

“This box will be put away somewhere safe from other people.”

I nod. I don’t really care where the box goes to be honest. All I care about it getting rid of my charge. The doctor leaves the room just as Dad comes back in. “How are you feeling today?” he asks.

“A bit better,” I reply. “The doctor just had me do that block thing.”

“How did it go?”

“All I had to do was put my hands on it to release my charge. It’s hardly brain surgery.”

My sarcasm doesn’t seem to be having a humorous effect on Dad today and he walks out of the room. I look at Mum guiltily and then she gets up to find Dad. Honestly, why couldn’t he just see that I was only joking? I get he’s upset because both his parents have now gone but…surely he can still see the funny side to some things?

I’m upset about their deaths too – but I’m trying to have a fun time as well as grieving for my grandparents.

They wouldn’t want us moping around all day feeling sorry for ourselves. They’d want us to be out enjoying life – not that I can enjoy it at the moment – but that isn’t the point.

Mum and Dad come back in. “I know you were only joking,” says Dad. “I’m sorry for walking out like that.”

I smile. “You don’t need to apologize,” I say. “I shouldn’t have been so sarcastic.”

Mum sits back down, followed by Dad who sits next to her. “I really want to hold your hand, Ben,” laughs Mum. “But if I do, you’ll charge me up.”

“Well, we all need our batteries restarted every now and again,” I joke. Mum laughs. “That’s a good pun,” she says. At least I can joke about my situation whilst at the same time, feeling sorry for myself about it. I mean, I can proper milk it if I really want to. But I’m not. I’m not like that.

~

I’m bored. I have nothing to do and it is literally killing me. Staying in bed all day, every day is not my idea of a fun day out. I want to be out doing something, not staring at these same four walls for every second I’m in here.

Mum and Dad have gone home now as they need to keep an eye on Rex. Oh didn’t I say? Mum took Rex to the vet whilst I was at the hospital.

He’s just got a bug that he must have caught from another dog in the park or something so that explains his tiredness and laziness. I have to say I am relieved that it is just a bug and not anything more serious.

I don’t think I can be dealing with anymore drama and tragedy right now. What’s even more annoying about being stuck in hospital is that I can’t even go to the toilet without supervision. Anything around the hospital can shock me. Really, I think I should be in an isolated room that can contain the charge without causing anything to shock me. But I’m just in an ordinary hospital room. Luckily, I have my own room and don’t have anyone else in there except visitors and doctors.

The double doors open and Kai walks in. “What’re you doing here?” I ask him.

“I just came to see how you are,” he says. “What happened to you is really odd.”

“Yeah it is. But it’s over now. I’ve just got to get rid of this charge and then I can go home.”

Kai smiles. “How long will that take?” he asks.

“However long it needs to. It depends on how much charge leaves me at one time,” I explain. “If a small amount leaves me each time I use the block, then it’ll take longer. But if a larger amount leaves me, then it’ll take less time.”

Kai looks at me confused. To be honest though, if it was him in my situation and he had to explain that to me, I’d be just as confused as the next man.

“Where are your parents?” asks Kai. “Surely they’d want to be here with you?”

“They had to go home,” I say. “Rex has a bug so they have to keep an eye on him. They’ll probably be back later though.”

Kai nods. He doesn’t like hospitals. His sister died here. It was a tragic time. She was on a night out with her friends and some drink-driver drove into her and her friends. She was the only fatality. Her friends survived but had serious injuries.

The driver was found and he was sentenced to four years. Personally though, I think he should have got longer.

Kai doesn’t really talk about his sister much anymore though. The pain and trauma of what happened is still within him and whenever anyone mentions his sister’s name, he goes mental and breaks down. So I try my best not to do it. I don’t want to lose my best friend over it.

“Hate these places,” he says. “They bring back horrible memories.”

I look at Kai and smile. “It’s okay,” I say. “If you want to go, then go. You don’t have to stay if you don’t want to.”

Kai shakes his head. “No, no,” he says. “You’re my best mate and I’m staying here, no matter how hard it is for me.”

I smile. It is nice having Kai as my mate. He’s the only one who’s ever really been there for me. All my other ‘mates’ are snakes, quite frankly. They either treated me like dirt or don’t contact me anymore. Kai is the one who has stuck by me in all my difficult moments. And I do the same for him.

~

Mum and Dad are back now. They arrived probably about an hour ago. Kai left shortly afterwards.

They were quite surprised to see Kai but they were thankful for him coming to see me. And so was I.

The doctor will be round again soon so I can do the block for the second time today. He came in earlier just to see how I was. Although I’m getting agitated with being in hospital and not being able to get active, I said I was fine. It wasn’t a lie. It just necessarily wasn’t the whole truth.

“We saw the doctor earlier,” says Dad.

“What did he say?” I ask.

“He said that you can start to eat small, easy to digest foods.”

“What about drink?”

“Not yet. He said you should be able to start drinking when the charge starts to decrease a lot more.”

I frown. This is what I mean. It’s an absolute pain being in hospital. I’m basically being starved of food and drink.

I need water. My throat is so dry from not having any drink for days. Weeks even.

“I hate this place!” I snap. “Why did I have to pick up that stupid stone?!”

I’m really annoyed now. Mum tries her best to calm me down. “Ben, it’s alright,” she says. “You’ll be able to drink soon.”

“But I need water now!”

“Tell you what. I’ll ask the doctor if soup is suitable. That way, you’ll have some liquid in you.”

Mum gets up to go and find the doctor whilst Dad is left alone with me. “Don’t worry mate,” he says. “You’ll be ship-shape before you know it.”

I ignore him. I don’t want to be here anymore. I want to be back at home, in my bed, with food and drink and I want my dog! Sounds silly I know but Rex isn’t a person so he won’t judge me or try to make me feel better. He’ll just cuddle me.

Mum comes back a few minutes later. “He said no,” she says. “You need to have solid food.”

I shake my head. “This is an absolute joke!” I scream.

~

The doctor comes in with the block again. “Evening,” he says. “How are you?”

“Fine,” I lie. I couldn’t be further from fine. I’m starting to loathe this place now. The quicker I get out, the better. The doctor puts the block on my bed again. “Same routine as before,” he says. “And when you’re done, I’ll get the cook to bring you some food.”

I do the block again to get rid of more of the charge and then the doctor leaves, with the block in the same box as before. I don’t want to think how long I’ll be waiting now before I get some food.

“You’ll be out of here before you know it,” says Mum, trying to comfort me.

I roll onto my side. I don’t want to be here. End of.

Chapter 25

The Friday morning sunshine glows through the window. I’m still in hospital. I didn’t get much sleep last night because I was just so hot, agitated and uncomfortable. I hope I can go home soon because if I have to spend one more night here, I’m going to lose it.

This place is the worst place possible to be. Mum and Dad aren’t even here yet and it’s ten o’clock! They’re usually here way before now. Are they stuck in traffic? Do they just not want to see me today? I don’t blame them if it’s the latter. I don’t even want to see me today to be quite honest.

The doctor will be round in an hour to give me the block for the first time today. Dinner last night was disgusting. I don’t even know what it was.

All I know is that it was horrible, hospital food that no one likes and no one wants to eat.

But I forced it down as I was really hungry. “Don’t rush it,” Mum said to me. “You’ll give yourself indigestion.”

I really didn’t care. I rushed it so that I didn’t have to have the taste of it in my mouth for much longer.

“Morning!” sings the cook as she comes in. “What would you like for breakfast?”

“What have you got?” I mumble.

“Toast or cereal?”

“Toast please.”

“Jam or butter?”

“Jam.”

She puts two slices of bread onto a plate and gives me two small pots of jam. Is that it? Two small pots of jam? Absolute joke if you ask me.

The cook leaves me in peace and I spread the jam on the toast with the plastic knife she gave me.

I asked her why I had to have a plastic knife and she said it was to do with patient safety. Patient safety? Is she serious? What am I going to do with a blunt, spreading knife?

The plastic knife snaps as I start to spread the jam.

This does it for me. I get angry. I throw the plate with the toast and the blob of jam at the wall and it causes a mess. But I really don’t care. This place…this place is going to be the death of me!

~

“And he can go home?” asks Mum.

“Yes,” says the doctor. “I am quite happy with his progress and the charge is completely gone. I suggest that he doesn’t rush straight into touching or doing anything that involves electricity. He will need to gradually introduce himself back to it.”

“Thank you doctor,” says Dad. Mum and Dad turn to me. “You hear that, Son?” says Mum. “You can go home!”

“Finally,” I mumble. I slowly lift myself out of the bed and stand up. “Easy,” says the doctor. “You’re weak so don’t be putting too much strain on yourself.”

I nod, not really listening. I walk over to my bag and pull out some clothes. “Can I have five minutes alone so I can get changed out of this horrible hospital gown?” I say. Mum and Dad and the doctor all leave.

The clothes in my bag are not the same as the ones from a few weeks back. Mum said that she had to throw them out because of the charge.

So I’ve now lost a perfectly good pair of jeans and my favourite stripy shirt too.

~

I’m ready to go home. Dad is still talking to the doctor. “Well, thank you for taking care of him,” says Dad, offering a handshake to the doctor. “And we’ll be sure not to let him do too much in these next few days.”

The doctor shakes Dad’s hand and then smiles. “Bye Ben,” says the doctor. I smile, acknowledging a goodbye.

We make our way out into the corridor. “When we get home,” says Mum. “Can you charge my phone please?”

Me, Mum and Dad all burst into happy laughter. I haven’t smiled or laughed like this in days. I know Mum’s only joking. And that’s what I needed really. I just needed something to cheer me up. And Mum has done just that.

Epilogue

Yesterday was Grandma and Grandad’s funeral. It was a very emotional day for all of us. Dad was the most affected out of everyone who attended. Mum comforted him and Uncle Max had to say his eulogy because he was too upset and couldn’t do it. “Mum was a lovely, bright woman,” read Uncle Max. “She was always there for me when I was young. When I was five, I fell over in the back garden. Max just laughed. But Mum came over and kissed my knee better. She counted to three and said ‘better’?”

Everyone mumbled a laugh. “Dad on the other hand,” continued Uncle Max. “Well, he was a joker. But he was also affectionate and a great Dad. And I couldn’t have asked for a better one. When I turned thirteen, he played this massive joke on me only for me to then find out he did it so I would keep out of the way so he and Mum could organize my party. I’m going to miss them a lot.”

Uncle Max made his way back to the pew he was sitting in. I could see it in his face that he wanted to cry but he kept holding back his tears. He obviously wanted to be strong. Not only for Grandma and Grandad, but for Dad too.

Dad has been affected the most throughout this whole time between their deaths and the funeral. And I reckon he’s still going to be affected for a long time afterwards too.

At the wake, I met some of Grandma’s friends that I didn’t even know existed. One of them was called Mable. She was lovely. “I used to go to school with your grandmother,” she told me. “She was such a cheeky child.”

I laughed. “I think it was in one of our sports lessons,” said Mable. “Your grandmother would hide in the changing rooms so she didn’t have to do any sport. I did the same once or twice. But we got caught eventually.”

I’m surprised Mable could remember all the way back then. I can hardly remember what I was doing a year ago, let alone 80-odd years.

One of Grandad’s friends, Patrick, was nice too. We had a good chat about how they used to be friends when they were teenagers. They didn’t go to the same school as Patrick went to a private school but they knew each other because they lived opposite each other.

He told me all about how they used to go to the creek on summer evenings.

“We would sit on the bank,” said Patrick. “And we’d talk. Our conversations weren’t that interesting but we liked them. And if I could go back to those days…I would.”

~

“Ben, we’ve got something to tell you,” says Mum. She smiles at Dad.

“Come on then,” I say. “Spit it out.”

“I’m pregnant!”

“Really?! Oh wow. Yay!”

“You are happy for us, aren’t you?” Dad questions.

“Of course I am,” I reply, happily.

I hug Mum and Dad. At first when Mum first said she wanted another baby, I wasn’t too happy about it. But I’ve gotten used to the idea now. The only thing I’m not happy about is that I’ve got to share a room with it.

But I’m going to be a big brother and that is the most exciting thing I could ask for.

I’m not going to dwell on the past. I’m not going to dwell on the present. But I am going to look forward to the future. Because who knows what it will bring for me? To the future. And to new beginnings.

The End

Dear Reader,

Thank you for taking the time to read my novel. I hope you enjoyed reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it.

About the Author

I’m Jake Uniacke and I am a 17-year-old teen author from Hampshire. I began writing novels aged just 14. My first seven novels were published, however they’ve now been taken down from sale due to my writing becoming better. However my most recent novels, Life’s a Gamble, The Dog Who Came for Christmas & Midnight are still for purchase.

Find me on:

Instagram: @jakeuniackeauthor

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