Always Too Late

Micalea Smeltzer

Contents

—WILLOW CREEK—

Always Too Late

Never Too Late

Chapter One - Never Too Late

—WILLOW CREEK—

Mathias Wade may be the lead singer of Willow Creek, but he didn’t start out that way.

Once upon a time, he was simply a boy that loved a girl, but their story ended in tragedy.

This is the beginning.

© Copyright 2017 Micalea Smeltzer

All rights reserved. This book or any portion thereof may not be reproduced or used in any manner whatsoever without the express written permission of the publisher.

This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, businesses, places, events and incidents are either the products of the author’s imagination or used in a fictitious manner. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental.

Created with Vellum Created with Vellum

Always Too Late

REMY

“You’re kind of weird.”

The guy watched me with shrewd silvery-gray eyes beneath heavy dark brows. My words were rude, but he seriously was weird.

“Are you going to help me or not?” I pointed to our biology work laid out on our double table.

Why did Mrs. Ferris put me with this guy?

Mathias Wade and I didn’t exactly have the best track record. In fact, he was probably staring because I burned him with one of my cigarettes yesterday.

“You know those will kill you, right?”

I looked up to see the good-looking guy from my biology class standing in front of me. His messy dark brown hair fell into his eyes, and he gave me that blinding smile that had most girls spreading their legs for him.

“Do I look like a care?” I puffed out some smoke right in his face.

He didn’t cough or flinch away.

“Give me one,” he said.

I raised a brow. “They’ll kill you, you know?” I mimicked his voice.

He smiled slowly and straightened. “Something’s going to kill me one day.” He shrugged. Something dark flashed in his unique gray eyes. “I might as well do the killing. I’m already screwed.”

I handed him a cigarette and lit the tip.

“Enjoy, because you’re not getting anymore freebies from me.”

His lips twitched with the threat of a smile before he settled with a brooding stare and leaned against the brick exterior wall of the school.

“How’d you find me out here?” I asked.

He pushed his hair out of his eyes. “I followed you,” he admitted, not ashamed.

I stared at him. “Why?”

“Why do you think?” His eyes were serious and his mouth was a straight line. I found myself staring at his lips. They were slightly plump and pouty, but not in a girly way. They tempered the sharp cut of his jaw, and I wondered if they were as soft as they looked.

I shook my head free of those thoughts, focusing on what he had said.

“I’m not sucking your dick,” I sneered. “That’s a vicious rumor Jake started because he’s an asshole.”

His eyes glinted dangerously and my stomach stirred with something I’d never felt before. Not lust, I’d felt that plenty. It was something else that made no sense.

“That’s not what I wanted, but now that you mention it…” He reached for his zipper. “Ow!” He yelped when the tip of my cigarette burned the skin between his thumb and forefinger. “I was only joking. Fuck.”

He waved his hand through the air.

“That’s not something to joke about.” I squared my shoulders. “And for the record, I’m not against blowjobs, I just don’t want to be forced to give one.”

He stared at me like I was the most mysterious creature he’d ever seen.

“I don’t want to have sex with you…well, I’d like to,” he admitted sheepishly, “but that’s not why I followed you out here.”

“It’s not?”

“No.” He stared at me intensely. “I’ve been watching you, and I’ve realized that you’re a lot like me.”

“I am?” I looked at him like he was crazy.

He nodded and leaned close to me. “You’re not like the other girls here, who piss their pants if they see a fucking spider. You’re wild. You don’t care what people think of you. You’re the bad girl they scoff at, but all secretly want to be.”

“And you are?” I asked, lighting a new cigarette.

“I’m the fucked-up bad boy everyone wants to save,” his voice lowered, “but you wouldn’t try to save me, would you, Remy? Because you’re just like me.”

My breath stuttered and he grinned at having made me react.

“I don’t understand what you want.” I stood tall and my voice never quavered.

“You.”

He started to walk away, but promptly turned back around. He dug something out of his back pocket and I realized it was a pack of cigarettes. He handed me one of the slender white sticks and grinned. “No freebies, right?”

Mathias was a confusing guy. He was hot, probably the hottest guy in our school—well, him and his identical twin brother, Maddox. But he didn’t like people. He kept to himself and only hung out with his twin and his friend, Ezra, who was also their foster brother. I’d also noticed them hanging out with an older student, Josh; I thought his name was.

I poked Mathias sharply with my pencil. “What the fuck was that for?” he snapped, waving his hand through the air.

I mock pouted. “Aw, did I hurt the baby? Quit fucking staring at me and help me with this.” I pointed to the worksheet we were supposed to be filling out together on DNA.

“Go out with me.”

A girl in our class squeaked behind me. Her name was Josie and it was a known fact she had a crush on Mathias.

I stared at him, blinking. “What did you say?”

“You heard me.” He didn’t smile, giving me no indication that he was joking.

“You’re serious?” I stared at him dumbfounded.

I mean, there were crazier things than me going out with Mathias Wade. In fact, we were really kind of suited for each other. I was a bitch and he was an asshole—so clearly, we were a match made in heaven.

He nodded.

“You just told me yesterday that you wanted to have sex with me and now you’re asking me out?”

He shrugged. “Seemed logical.”

“I…” I couldn’t find any reason to say no. “Um…okay.”

He smiled, and I was struck by how something so simple could completely transform his face. His smile disappeared almost as quickly as it came, though, and I found myself missing it. I wanted to find a way to bring it back—I guess I’d have my chance to try on our date.

I smiled to myself, wondering where on earth Mathias Wade was going to take me on our date.

* * *

I was getting ready to go on a date with Mathias Wade.

What. The. Ever. Loving. Fuck.

I must’ve been living in an alternate universe.

Mathias was a guy of few words, so he’d given me no hints about what we’d be doing. So I chose to wear jeans and a loose black sweater. It was early fall, school had barely started, and the weather hadn’t quite gotten cold yet. On my feet, I wore a pair of black combat boots. I applied my makeup and brushed my straight hair.

I bounded down the stairs and poked my head in the kitchen. “Mom? I’m heading out for a while.”

She looked up from the pot she was cooking—smelled like marinara for spaghetti. “It’s a school night.”

“I won’t be late,” I promised.

Her lips pressed into a thin line. My parents didn’t like me going out, and if she saw Mathias; she’d definitely make me stay home. His whole attitude screamed trouble. I thought maybe that’s why I was drawn to him.

“Okay,” she sighed reluctantly and went back to stirring.

Mathias was supposed to pick me up in five minutes. I didn’t think he had a car…we were only sophomores, and since the year had just started; most of us weren’t old enough to drive yet.

I sat on the front steps and waited for him.

A couple of minutes later I saw him walking up the street.

I stood. dusted off my pants, and went to meet him. “Where do you live?” I asked him. “Did you walk all the way over here?”

He shrugged. “Not too far.”

That wasn’t much of an answer but you never really got one with him.

“So, where are we going?” I asked.

“You don’t mind to walk, right?” he asked. “Shoulda’ thought about that,” he mumbled to himself.

“I don’t mind.”

“Cool.” He started walking, expecting me to follow.

I rolled my eyes. Asshole.

Thank God I wore boots and not heels like some girls, or this would suck. As it was, I didn’t really mind. Besides, I’d be a hypocrite if I bitched too much. My neighborhood is in an older part of town, within walking distance to a bunch of old shops and restaurants. I spent a lot of time there, walking around after school to get coffee and hang out.

“Do you like pizza?” Mathias asked, breaking the silence.

“Who doesn’t love pizza?” I countered.

He shrugged. “I thought you might be like some of those idiot girls who don’t eat carbs or whatever.”

“I love pizza.”

His smile flashed again and I made a metal tally of it. That’s twice Mathias Wade had smiled because of me.

We walked side by side on the street, and he didn’t try to hold my hand.

I was grateful for that. I didn’t like hand-holding.

It irked me.

I wasn’t exactly the lovey-dovey type, and I was kind of surprised I’d agreed to go out with Mathias.

The guy was strange, but something about him drew me in.

We reached the pizza place and he opened the door for me, letting me walk in first.

“Thanks,” I mumbled, surprised by his chivalrousness.

“No problem.” He cleared his throat, like he wasn’t quite used to being thanked.

“Take a seat anywhere!” A frazzled waitress called out from the back.

“Looks like we have a our pick of places.” Mathias waved his hand around to encompass the empty restaurant. “Where do you want to sit?” he asked.

“Um…” I pressed my lips together, eyeing the spots. “That one.” I pointed to the booth by the window.”

He nodded and sat down. I slid onto the booth seat across from him. The checkered tablecloth was slightly damp like it had just been wiped down.

“Hi, I’m Meredith. What can I get you to drink?” the harried waitress asked us.

“Uh...I’ll have a Coke,” I answered.

“Coke for me, too,” Mathias echoed.

“I’ll be right back with those. Menus are on the table.” She pointed.

I picked one up, though it was unnecessary. I’d been here many times and practically had the menu memorized.

“What do you want?” Mathias asked, his dark brows drawn together as he inspected the menu. He looked angry, he usually did. It was like his face had naturally settled into that irritated look.

“Cheese pizza.”

He looked up from his menu. “Just cheese? That’s it.”

“Yeah,” I replied. “I don’t like peppers, or onions, or meat, or anything else someone thought to put on a pizza. Cheese and sauce—I like it simple.”

His lips quirked again. It wasn’t quite a smile but I was counting it as one.

Three.

Our waitress returned with our drinks and took our order. I, of course, got cheese pizza, while Mathias ordered a supreme.

When she was gone, he crossed his fingers together and laid them across the table.

“Remy.”

I mimicked his pose. “Mathias.”

He shook his head, smiling again.

That’s four.

“Why’d you ask me on a date?”

He sat back in the booth, tilting his head to appraise me. “Because you’re like me.”

I snorted. “What the fuck does that mean?”

He swallowed thickly and seemed to be thinking very deeply. “We’re not like the rest of them…we’re hard.”

“If you’re referring to the state of your dick, that’s just gross.”

He shook his head. “Fuck, Remy. No, that’s not what I’m saying. I just mean…I see it in your eyes, okay?”

“What?” I asked. “What do you see in my eyes?”

“The darkness,” he whispered.

That caused me to pause. “What kind of darkness?”

“One that speaks of hatred, neglect, and pain…so much fucking pain.”

I wet my lips with my tongue and pressed them together. His words had hit a little too close to home.

“How do you know?”

“Because my life is the same. It’s easy to read something in someone else when it’s all you fucking know.”

I bit my tongue so hard I tasted blood. I’d never had someone say that to me before, and he took me by surprise.

My parents weren’t the worst out there, not by a long shot, I knew that, but they’d always favored my older brother while I’d been cast aside. It’d always been more neglectful than hateful, though my dad did have a temper if I fucked up.

Which was often.

“You don’t have to tell me about it,” he continued, picking up his Coke and taking a sip. “I sure as fuck don’t want to talk about mine, but I just want you to know that I see, and I understand.”

I pressed my lips together. Mathias noticed more than I gave him credit for. He clearly wasn’t the thug I originally made him out to be.

The waitress placed our pizzas on the table and we both dug in.

“So,” I began, “tell me something about you I don’t know.”

He picked a piece of stringy cheese off his pizza and placed it back on the platter. “There are lots of things you don’t know about me yet, Remy.” The way he said yet gave me the impression he thought I’d soon know all those little things about him. “I sing,” he finally answered.

My eyes widened in surprise. “Really?”

He grinned and I added it to my list.

Five.

“So shocked that I could actually have talent?”

I laughed and shrugged. “Sort of,” I admitted. “You kind of come across like you don’t care about anything.”

Darkness flashed in his eyes. “It’s easier to pretend I don’t feel. If I don’t feel, I can’t hurt.”

I frowned, my heart tugging for this dark, mysterious boy. Just this short time with him showed me that he was the kind of person I’d like to know.

“I can understand that,” I admitted.

He nodded, turning his attention to his pizza. “What’s something about you that I don’t know?”

“I’m really not all that interesting,” I mumbled.

He grinned slowly. Six. “I beg to differ.”

I bit my lip, thinking. Why was it that when someone wanted to know about you, suddenly you couldn’t even remember your own name?

“I hate caramel.”

He smirked. “Come on, you can do better than that.”

“What?” I defended. “It’s a legitimate answer.”

“All right, all right.” He sighed.

“Tell me more about singing,” I pleaded, wanting to turn the conversation back to him.

“Well, my brother, Maddox, and I want to start a band with a our friend, Ezra. We need someone else, but so far we haven’t found anyone we click with.”

“Does your band have a name yet?”

He shook his head and grabbed another slice of pizza. “We have a couple we like, but nothing has stuck yet.”

“What’s the top choice?”

“Kinky Kisser.” His lips tipped up into a smirk so I’d know he was joking.

“It has a nice ring to it.”

“I think so, too.” He grinned and my heart soared. I didn’t know what was happening to me. Yesterday, I couldn’t stand the guy, but after today…I thought I might have a little crush. Mathias was enigmatic and enticing—a complicated puzzle I was desperate to put together so I could see the whole picture.

* * *

From that day on, I found myself spending every minute I could with Mathias.

My parents, of course, didn’t approve of him, but that didn’t stop us.

When you’re young, and falling in love, you’ll do anything to be with each other and the rest be damned.

Tap. Tap. Tap.

I smiled from bed and jumped up, throwing back the covers.

I crept over to the window, and as quietly as I could, slid it up, peering down into the dark yard at Mathias. When he saw me his whole face lit up. I was learning that I was one of the few things that made him smile.

He climbed the trellis up the roof outside my window. With an agility that shouldn’t be possible for a guy as large as he was, he managed to slip into my room.

He rubbed his hands together as I shut the window, locking it closed.

“It’s freezing out there,” he complained, shucking off his jacket and shirt. His pants came off next and he was left only in his boxers. I stared at his chest for a little too long. He was muscular, but not overly so, his body still leaning more towards boy than man.

He’d been sneaking in my bedroom window and sleeping with me for months now. Just sleeping. While our high school class would like to believe I was a slut, I was actually the complete opposite. Yeah, I talked good game, but I was actually kind of shy. Mathias and I hadn’t had sex yet, but we had fooled around. We were young, so we couldn’t help it. The temptation is too much to bear sometimes.

“Nice shorts.” He smirked, pointing at my super short-shorts with cherries on them. I wouldn’t lie; I picked them out solely because of how amazing they made my legs look.

“Thanks.” I tucked a piece of light blonde hair behind my ear. My heart raced in my chest. Tonight. Tonight, everything changed. I felt it in my gut, whether Mathias knew it or not. He must’ve sensed it because he stepped closer, placing a hand on my waist, just above my butt, and pulling me into his body. He was hard where I was soft, my curves melting into him.

“Remy,” he breathed my name on a whisper, running his thumb over my bottom lip.

I moaned, kissing the pad of his thumb. I ran my hands up his chest, twining them around his neck.

“I’m ready,” I confessed.

His eyes flashed with desire, but a saw a little worry there too. “We don’t have to—” He started and I shook my head, silencing him.

“I want this. I’m ready,” I assured him.

He brushed his nose against mine. “I don’t want you to regret this. To regret me.” His sad eyes met mine, and I understood what he was saying. His own mom didn’t love him, and he was scared to lose me.

“That’s not happening,” I vowed.

I never thought I’d love someone the way I loved Mathias. The two of us…we were one in the same. He was my perfect other half. I didn’t know if we’d be together forever, at our age, forever seemed so long, but right now I knew I didn’t want anything but him.

He cupped my cheeks in his hands, angling my head back. He kissed me long and slow, taking his time. His chest was warm pressed against mine. My heart beat a mile a minute in my chest, and I wondered if he could feel it. It felt like it was going to fall out of my chest and roll away.

He backed me up slowly, until the back of my legs hit my bed.

I fell onto it softly, his body rolling on top of mine. He caught his weight on his hands so he didn’t crush me.

I felt so small beneath him.

Swallowed whole.

His lips were soft against mine, but firm.

His hands skimmed under my shirt, pushing at the fabric, and goosebumps broke out across my skin, making me shiver.

He noticed and pulled back. “Remy?” he probed, his eyes questioning.

“I’m okay,” I rushed to assure him.

He stared at me a moment longer, assessing the situation and my sincerity before continuing.

He pushed my shirt up farther and I sat up to help him take it off.

His eyes lingered on my bare chest and I bit my lip.

“You’re so perfect,” he breathed, his eyes flashing.

He was on me again in an instant and we sank into the pillows.

Everything blurred as we removed our clothes and joined. I expected it to be clumsy and awkward, and maybe one day I’d look back and think that, but for now it was perfect.

* * *

“You guys are gross,” Maddox groaned, dropping down into a cafeteria seat across the table from us.

Mathias removed his tongue from my mouth and flipped his brother off. “You’re just jealous because you don’t have a girlfriend.”

Maddox picked at his cold school pepperoni pizza, making a face. “How do they expect us to eat this?”

Ezra, their friend, overheard him as he joined us. “It’s the government. They’re trying to kill us.” He plopped down beside Maddox, across from me. He pushed his floppy black hair off his forehead.

“The government?” an upperclassman muttered, passing us. He circled back and collapsed into the seat beside Maddox. “They totally are. Did you know they allow rodent hair in peanut butter?”

I looked down at the peanut butter and jelly sandwich I packed from home and gagged. “That’s disgusting.”

“Who the fuck are you?” Mathias asked the newcomer.

The guy held out his hand. “Joshua Hayes. I go by Hayes.” He had blond hair and a goofy smile.

Mathias didn’t take his hand, so Maddox did instead. “I’m Maddox. That’s my twin, Mathias, Ezra, and Remy.”

“Nice to meet you.” Hayes waved. “I’m sorry to just drop into your conversation, but I heard you mention the government so I couldn’t help myself. They’re all a bunch of crooked shits.” He stood, pushing to his feet. “I have to get to band class.”

“Band?” Ezra asked. “What do you play?”

“Electric guitar.” Hayes mimed that he was playing. “I’m a little too rock ‘n’ roll for them but we make it work.”

Ezra smacked Maddox’s arm and motioned to Mathias, silently communicating.

Mathias shook his head and mouthed, “No.”

Ezra argued right back. “Hey, Hayes?” he called when the guy started to walk away.

Hayes jogged back, his steps light and bouncy. He grinned crookedly. “Yeah?”

“We have our own band, and we need a guitar player. You interested?” Ezra asked.

“Hell yeah.” Hayes fist bumped him. “I’m so in.”

Mathias rolled his eyes and I poked his side. “Be nice,” I hissed under my breath.

Hayes exchanged numbers with Ezra and clasped hands with Maddox.

“Welcome to Willow Creek,” Maddox told him.

I glanced up at Mathias. “You guys finally decided on a name?”

He nodded. “Yep.”

“Willow Creek,” I repeated. “I love it.”

* * *

“Where are you taking me, Mathias Wade?” I groaned, trooping behind him through the thick brush.

He stopped, turning around to offer me his hand. “Be patient.”

I took his hand and he helped me over a thick root. “If you’re taking me out here to push me off a cliff, just know, I’ll push you first.”

He chuckled, pushing his way through thick trees.

They finally opened up and I gasped, taking his hand so I could stand beside him.

“You can see the whole town from here,” I gasped, bringing my eyes to his.

We gazed down at the whole city, the river, and the mountains.

“It’s beautiful.” I felt a little bad for bitching at him now—but only a little.

His eyes lingered on my face, moving down my neck. “I wanted you to experience what I feel when I look at you.”

My lips parted at his words. “Mathias,” I sighed, dreamily. He wasn’t usually the most romantic, but when he did things like this, he totally rocked it.

I laid my head on his shoulder and he kissed my hair. “I love you, Remy.”

“I love you.”

If you’d told me a year ago that I’d fall head over heels in love with Mathias Wade, I’d have told you that you were crazy.

Life is weird like that.

* * *

I stare at the two little lines on the pregnancy test, my heart stopping.

No.

I slap a hand over my mouth, running for the toilet. I empty the contents of my stomach.

I lay against the cold tile, sweat covering my body.

I roll my shirt up, pressing a hand to my flat stomach. There’s a baby in there.

Mathias’ baby.

What was I going to do? We were too young to have a baby. We couldn’t do this, but…but I knew I couldn’t get rid of it. That was still a baby, our baby.

I began to cry, unable to keep the tears at bay.

I was scared, terrified, really. We’d been careful, but apparently not careful enough. This was one mistake I couldn’t erase, and I knew it was yet another thing my father would hold over my head.

I could never do anything right.

I was a fuck up and that’s all I’d ever be.

* * *

“Rem? What’s wrong?” Mathias probed, staring at me.

We sat outside during our lunch hour, and the summer sun was hot. School would be over in a matter of weeks and I still hadn’t told him about the baby. Every time I tried, the words would get stuck in my throat. It wasn’t that I didn’t want to tell him; I was just scared. A baby is a big deal, and while Mathias said he loved me, he was a guy; he could easily run.

“Rem?” he said again. “You’re not eating.”

I shrugged, poking at my turkey sandwich. My stomach rolled, threatening to revolt. “I’m not hungry.”

“I’m starving. I’ll eat it.” Maddox’s hand whipped out lightning fast and he stole my sandwich, eating half in one bite.

“That’s her sandwich,” Mathias defended, reaching out for my sandwich.

Maddox pushed him away. “She didn’t want it.”

Mathias shook his head. “Do you want me to get you something else?”

“No.” My stomach rolled again at the thought of food. “I’m good.”

“I need to smoke,” he muttered, sneaking one from the pack. “You want one?” he asked me.

I shook my head, turning him down like I had ever since I found out I was pregnant.

His brows knitted together and he gave me a funny look.

“Are you sick?” he asked.

“No,” I replied, looking toward Ezra. He was busy chomping away at the…actually, I didn’t know what that was. Cafeteria mystery meat for the win.

“You’re acting funny,” he observed.

“I just don’t want to smoke,” I snapped, more bite to my tone than usual.

He shrugged. “Suit yourself.”

He stood and snuck off to our usual spot to smoke. It was a little alcove outside that hid you from the sight of the teachers on duty.

It also came in handy for hot make out sessions and heavy groping.

Maddox finished my sandwich and frowned at the empty spot in front of him. “I’m still hungry.” I stared at him in horror—I’d just witnessed him eat two slices of pizza and my sandwich. He stood, grabbing his empty tray. “I’m going to see if they have anything left. You guys want anything?”

Ezra and I both shook our heads.

Maddox headed inside to get more food. I had no idea where he put it all. He wasn’t a big guy; in fact he was leaner than Mathias.

Mathias returned, the heavy scent of cigarette smoke clinging to his shirt.

“I’m gonna be sick,” I cried, jumping up from the table and running to the nearby bush.

I threw up everything in my stomach, which wasn’t much.

Mathias came up behind me and grabbed my hair. “I knew you were sick. You’re such a fucking liar, Rem.”

I wiped the back of my hand across my mouth. “I’m going to the nurse.”

“I’ll go with you.”

“No,” I cried a bit too loudly. “No,” I added softer. “They’re just going to send me home. It’s okay.”

I grabbed my backpack and he watched me go inside. When I glanced back, he looked as helpless as I felt, and he didn’t even know yet.

Once he did…I feared that look might never leave his face.

* * *

“We’re moving.”

The words were the final nail in my coffin.

“W-what did you say?” I stuttered.

“We’re moving,” my mom repeated.

Everything spun.

This couldn’t be happening.

No.

* * *

The stifling humidity of the summer heat made my clothes stick to my body. I was tempted to take my tank top off and leave myself in my bra and jeans, but I was still on school property, and I wouldn’t put it past one of the teachers to report me, even though it was the last day of school—and after school hours.

Mathias’ hand was clasped in mine as we walked together.

My heart beat irregularly in my chest.

I had to tell him that I was leaving.

I’d been putting this talk off—and the one about the baby—for weeks.

But time had caught up to me and now I was left with no choice but to break the news.

I figured I’d tell him about the move, and then baby. The move wasn’t as bad as the baby, right?

“Mathias?” I spoke, stopping in my tracks.

He stopped too and looked at me questioningly. “What is it? You’re not sick again are you? You’ve been looking a little pale.”

“I’m fine, but there’s something I have to tell you…”

He stopped and crossed his arms over his chest like he knew whatever was going to come out of my mouth was going to be bad.

“What’s going on, Remy?” he asked. “Is this some sort of intervention? I didn’t drink that much at that party, I swear.”

“No, it’s not about that,” I mumbled, thinking about the party we went to last weekend to celebrate school ending.

I shook my head, tears clinging to my lashes. I never cried, so Mathias knew this was bad.

“Rem?” he prompted.

“We’re moving.” I choked on the words like they were something physical lodged in my throat. “We leave in a week.”

“Moving? Where?” he asked, his dark brows furrowing into a straight line.

“Arizona,” I squeaked.

“Arizona?!” he roared. “Next week?! That might as well be all the way across the world!” He threw his arms in the air.

“Mathias,” I said his name calmly, “we can do the long distance thing.”

He shook his head roughly back and forth, his shaggy brown hair falling into his eyes. He pushed it back and slapped his baseball cap on backwards.

“No. No. No.” He seemed to be in a state of disbelief. “You can’t fucking leave me.”

I closed my eyes. He’d once told me he had abandonment issues. His dad had driven his car into a tree on a drunken binge and his mom was in jail. Even though his foster parents were great people, I knew he feared they’d grow tired of him and kick him out.

“I’m not leaving you by choice.” I reached for him and he flinched away from my touch. “This is my dad’s job, I have to go.”

A look of hatred settled over his face. “Just go then.”

“Mathias—”

“GO!” he yelled right in my face. “I always knew you would! I knew you were too good for me and that’s why I fucked Josie!”

“What?” I gasped, taking a step back and clenched my heart like I’d been shot. Josie? Josie Miller? The girl that was always batting her eyes at him in our biology class? How? What? When? Why? We spent so much time together, I didn’t see how…

“You heard me,” he seethed. “I fucked her, because you’ll never be enough for me.”

Tears coursed down my cheeks at his cruel words. “You cheated on me?”

I’d fallen in love with Mathias in a way I didn’t know you could at sixteen years old. I’d given him parts of myself I never shared with anyone. He knew everything about me, and right now he was destroying me.

He nodded, his teeth clenched together. “Did you really think I’d settle for you?”

I flinched. Those words were like a slap to my face. “I don’t know what I thought.” My voice came out as no more than a whisper. I was normally a strong girl, but right now all my strength had left me. I felt like a piece of me was dying.

“She wasn’t the only one. There’ve been more.”

He continued to drill holes in my heart.

“How many?” I asked, gasping for air.

“More than you want to know,” he spat.

“I hate you!” I shouted, a sob cutting through my throat.

“Good, because I hate you too!” he yelled back.

“You’re nothing but a lying, cheating, filthy bastard, and I’m sorry for thinking there was more to you than that.” Then my hand reared back and connected with his cheek. My hand left behind a red imprint on his cheek.

He nodded once, like he was agreeing that he deserved that, and then he turned and walked away.

He left me standing there, crying in the school parking lot, as my entire world blew up in my face.

When his body was nothing but a speck in the distance, I whispered, “You’re going to be a dad.”

Then I fell to the ground in the fetal position and cried until a teacher found me.

Never Too Late

Remy and Mathias’ story continues in Never Too Late. Available everywhere.

I’d never met anyone quite like Mathias Wade. 

He was brooding and arrogant, but I loved him anyway. 

Together we were wild and uncontained—a hurricane raging. 

Then I had to leave, and words were exchanged that could never be undone.

But now I was back, and Mathias better watch out, because this bitch wasn’t finished with him. 

Game. Set. Match. 

All is fair in love and war, right?

Mathias Wade, the lead singer of Willow Creek, is used to getting everything he wants. Except for Remy Parker—the one that got away. Childhood friends that grew into more, Remy was the one constant in his life until she moved away. In anger, he lashed out and broke the only girl he ever loved. With temptation around every corner, Mathias drowns his sorrow in women and alcohol. When the band returns to their hometown for the holidays, the last thing Mathias expects is to run into Remy—but she’s back, and she’s not done with him.

Remy never forgot Mathias or the pain he caused her. When she moves back to the place she grew up, to take care of her ailing grandma, her heart is set on revenge. She’s determined to make Mathias fall in love with her all over again—only this time she’s going to break his heart.

But Mathias never stopped loving Remy—and she soon discovers that her feelings haven’t disappeared either.

Can two people too stubborn for their own good overcome their own demons and find the love they always deserved?

Chapter One - Never Too Late

I never thought I’d end up back here.

Back in the place where my whole life blew up into a million tiny pieces.

When we drove away with the moving truck in tow, I thought I was saying goodbye to this part of my life forever.

I’d been wrong.

Anger simmered inside my veins—anger at the boy I’d loved and lost here. He’d discarded me like I was a piece of trash, just when I needed him most. I was nothing to him.

Back when we were sixteen, he’d been nothing but a bad boy with a scowl on his face.

Now, Mathias Wade was the lead singer of Willow Creek—one of the most popular bands in the world.

I couldn’t escape him.

Everywhere I looked, his face was on a magazine, or one of their songs played on the radio.

At twenty-three years old, I should’ve been over him.

I guess to an extent I was, but the pain and anger had never gone away.

Now I was back home, and according to the copy of People magazine clutched in my hand, so was Mathias.

The pages of the magazine began to crinkle where I gripped it tightly.

I wanted to throw it down and stomp all over it—on him, just like he had done to me.

I wanted him to feel even a smidge of the pain I’d felt when he broke my heart into a million pieces.

I was convinced that once you fell in love with a Wade you could never stop loving them.

He should’ve been nothing more than the boy I loved as a teenager, but he wasn’t.

He was everything.

And I was nothing to him.

“Ma’am?”

I startled at the sound of the cashier’s voice.

“Do you want the magazine, too?” she asked.

I’d basically mauled the poor magazine into oblivion, so it would’ve been rude to put it back on the shelf. “Yeah.” I handed it over. The way I figured it, I could burn it and chant some kind of spell that would turn him into a toad.

I swiped my credit card, and she handed over the bag full of cat food and the magazine.

I’d only gotten back into town last night and realized I didn’t have cat food.

Percy was not pleased.

I made up for it by giving him too many treats.

He still wasn’t happy with me, but at least I felt better.

I made the short drive home—still fuming over Mathias.

I couldn’t believe that he was back in town. Although, I guess he never really left—according to the tabloids anyway. All the Willow Creek boys kept places in their hometown of Winchester, Virginia, even if they did spend a lot of time in L.A.

I pulled into the driveway, staring over at the plastic bag on the passenger seat.

I’d never finished reading the article, and now I was desperate to know everything it said.

I warred with myself, but finally I ripped the magazine from the bag and flipped through the pages.

Basically, the gist was that the guys were home for the holidays before their Coming Home Tour kicked off in the new year.

I ran my finger over the picture of the four of them. I didn’t know the blond one, but I knew Maddox—Mathias’ twin brother—and their best friend, Ezra. While I’d mostly hung out with Mathias, the other guys had been nice to me.

Even with the anger simmering in my veins, I couldn’t hate Mathias’ success. I’d always wanted that for him. When we were young, he’d never seen his own self-worth, but I’d always known he was remarkable. I hoped he saw that now, too.

I still hated his fucking guts though.

I startled at a noise and realized I’d ripped apart the magazine.

Oh well. There goes another one.

Sadly, it wasn’t the first time I’d torn apart a magazine because of Mathias.

I gathered up the torn shreds and put them in the plastic bag. I climbed out of the car, drawing my coat closer around me. After living in Arizona the last seven years, I’d forgotten how cold it got here.

I stepped into the older home—inhaling the scent of freshly baked chocolate chip cookies.

“Grandma!” I called as I locked the door. “You’re supposed to be in bed!”

“I wanted some cookies,” she called back, “so I’m making some God damn cookies, and no one can stop me.”

It was safe to say I got my fiery personality from my grandma.

I stepped into the kitchen and set the grocery bag down on the granite countertop—my parents had paid for the whole house to be remodeled a few years ago.

I kissed my grandma’s cheek. “Here, let me help.” I took the bowl from her so I could mix it. “Go sit down and I’ll finish this.”

She glared and yanked the bowl from my hands with surprising strength for someone as small and frail.

“Grandma!” I admonished. “You’re supposed to be resting. You had a heart attack.”

“And yet I’m still here. It’s going to take a whole lot more than a faulty heart to knock me down,” she huffed.

“Like what?” I asked, hiding a smile.

She thought for a minute, turning her head to the side. Her white hair was fluffed around her head and her duster hung limply on her frail frame. “Hmm, that chick that’s always sticking her tongue out on a wrecking ball. That’s what will knock me down.”

I busted out in laughter—not only at the visual that had formed in my head, but also at the fact that my nearly eighty-year-old grandma knew who Miley Cyrus was.

“Grandma, how do you even know that?” I asked, leaning a hip against the counter. Percy—my black cat—rubbed against my legs.

“I watch MTV. It’s the most entertainment I get during the day.” She frowned. Looking up at me she said, “I saw that young man you used to hang around with on there, one day. He was a bad influence on you.”

I rolled my eyes. “I think we were an equally bad influence on each other.”

She stared at me in disbelief and finally shrugged her thin shoulders. “You go finish unpacking your room while I do this.”

“Grandma,” I groaned, “if I do that then I’m already failing at taking care of you.”

“And like I told your overprotective father, I’m fine. I don’t need a babysitter.” She grabbed a spoon from the drawer and waved it around. “Besides, something is going to kill me eventually. I can’t live forever.”

“Aw, Grandma, and here I thought you were invincible.”

“The wrecking ball will get me one day,” she winked. She began to spoon out the cookie dough onto a pan. “It’s nice that you and your parents are worried, but I’ve been getting by fine on my own for years, and I’ll continue to do so.” She glanced up at me. “You’re young, Remy. You need to live your life, not take care of me. Go get a job, meet a guy, and have some fun.”

I frowned.

“And give me some great-grandbabies before I die.” I flinched at the mention of babies. “That’s an order.” She flicked the spoon at me and a glob of cookie dough landed on my shirt. I grabbed it and popped it into my mouth.

“You know my dad will kill me if I don’t keep an eye on you,” I warned her.

“Your dad is all the way in Arizona, what he doesn’t know won’t kill him.”

I wasn’t really into the idea of dating, or babies, but a job would be nice. I’d already been groaning about how boring it would be lazing around here day in and day out.

Back home I’d been working as a receptionist. I hated it. I wasn’t a desk job kind of girl. I wanted to be moving.

I had a degree in marketing, but I’d never done anything with it—much to the irritation of my parents. I’d only gone to college and studied that because I knew it was what they wanted, and I’d been trying to please them. They’d never really understood me. They both had high-paying jobs—my dad, a doctor, and my mom, a lawyer—and then my big brother was an attorney. They never made me feel like I wasn’t loved, but I knew they never really got me.

I was wild and spontaneous.

I was loud and obnoxious.

I was the girl that wasn’t afraid to be crazy.

I’m sure my dad would bust a vein in his forehead if he knew some of the craziest things I’d done.

Like that one time I road tripped to California by myself and went diving with sharks.

Or the time I was riding in the back of a friend’s truck and ripped my top off, letting my boobs fly free for the whole world to see.

Yeah…it was a good thing my dad didn’t know these things. He’d be the one headed to the grave, and not Grandma.

“All right, I’ll go finish unpacking and see if I can find any jobs online.”

“I’ll just be here, baking cookies, and not dying,” she cackled.

I shook my head and clucked my tongue for Percy to follow me.

Grandma had long ago moved into the bedroom downstairs so she didn’t have to use the stairs.

Fortunately for me, this left the whole upstairs as my domain.

When I arrived yesterday afternoon, she’d been quick to tell me I could do whatever I wanted with the whole space.

I was definitely considering painting my room a dark purple. Right now the walls were a pale green and everything was light and pretty in the room. My mother had clearly decorated it. While there was nothing wrong with her taste, it just wasn’t me. I preferred darker colors.

Percy jumped up on the pale yellow quilt, his black fur already covering the thing. Percy shed on everything. I might find it more of an annoyance if I didn’t usually dress in black.

I hadn’t brought a lot with me from Arizona, just clothes, some towels, and necessities. Unfortunately, I didn’t own much else, since I’d been living with my parents.

I was kind of a failure like that.

I frowned.

I hated feeling like a disappointment, but I did. When I was sixteen years old, I lost all the trust my parents had in me, and I never really got it back. It didn’t really bother me, in the sense that I still always did my own thing, but sometimes I wanted them to look at me the way they did Robert—my brother. I wanted them to be proud of me, but the fact of the matter was I never really did anything worthwhile.

All I did was fuck up.

Time and time again.

It was my specialty.

I sighed, yanking clothes out of my suitcase and dumping them on the floor. I wasn’t a very organized person—but since Grandma didn’t come up here, I didn’t have to worry about anyone seeing my mess.

I leaned my head against the bed and heard a soft meow when Percy jumped down and climbed into my lap.

I scratched him under his chin and looked down at him. He opened one amber colored eye to peek up at me.

“Well, Perce, what kind of trouble do you think I can get into here?”

He closed his eyes and laid his head back down on my lap.

I answered for him.

Lots.